Devastated - just been told my 3 yr old DS needs 2 fillings

[LorLa]

Help. I was totally devastated today when I took my 3 yr old son to the dentist to be told he needs 2 fillings. I can't believe it. We are (relatively!) educated people who eat healthily and are very vigilant about our children's eating habits and personal hygiene. I have always been so strict with what he eats and he didn't have chocolate until he was about 2 and even now only on very rare occasions. He only had his 1st ever check up 7 months ago and we were told everything was fine. Can this be true???

I have just booked an appointment for him at another dental surgery for tomorrow to get a second opinion. I need some answers here - if he does need fillings then I need to know why.

I feel like such an awful mother and am very upset about it all. Has anyone else had experience with such a young child?

Eh? Chillax, it's not your fault!

He might just have weak teeth AND it's not his adult teeth.
(said kindly) get a grip !

I think I needed that! But I am 30 and have no fillings. He's only had teeth for 2 years. I just don't get it.

Devastated? You need a bit of a reality check!

Perhaps your ds just has particularly weak enamel or something - ask your dentist whether having them painted with fluoride would help.

I would be very upset too, can totally understand your pov. No advice though, let us know how you get on.

Thanks mumblechum1 I will ask. Is this more common than I realise then? The dentist said to me "don't worry too much, these are milk teeth, you get another chance" - how bad did she make me feel.

Can I ask if you give your LO raisins and other dried fruit regularly? I was shocked to find out it is now a major cause of tooth decay as they stick to the teeth. My neighbour's daughter has just had to have major dental work done due to this, and her parents are very careful about diet.

Does he have a lot of juice. At least you take him to the dentist, lots of parents don't. Try not to feel bad.

LorLa- My DD (3) has also just had 2 fillings. We are careful about brushing etc (Lots of dentists in family). Both her dentist and the specialist paediatric dentist said that there was a problem with the 2 teeth (both in the same position on opposite sides of the mouth) and they probably hadn't formed properly. All her others are fine. The fillings were really quick and it was more like a bit of paste being put in- no drillings etc.
I also felt really guilty but they said there wasn't a lot I probably could have done to prevent them. (she was a bit premature which may have had something to do with it).

Thank you all so much for your advice. Yes pixipie151 I do give ds lots of fruit, dried fruit - if he is ever extra hungry I carry fruit bars with me thinking it's a good snack. Shocked to find out this could be doing the damage. Also I tend to brush ds's teeth after dinner but before milk as he often falls asleep having his milk - this could have caused the damage as well I have discovered.

I went to another dentist today and they were fab. I no longer fee like a bad mother. She said they will not inject him in order to do the work which was something I was really worried about. I am more confident in this dentist and ds seemed happier here too so were going in on Thursday morning to get them done. It has definitely opened my eyes to the sugars that are in healthy food though.....we are 3 times a day brushers now!

Thanks for all the support.

DD (also 3) was absolutely fine. No injection, v quick and she was really good. Good luck!

Thank you tvfriend.

It's ok! My milk teeth were terrible - I had lots of sugary antibiotics as a child which caused all the enamel to come off the bottom front teeth. I had to have a tooth taken out because it was breaking away!

I'm now 27 and don't have any fillings in my adult teeth, so just because your DS has fillings in his baby teeth doesn't mean his adult teeth will suffer! The teeth that need to be filled will fall out soon anyway!

My teeth are a picture of health - see

Just to add - brushing your teeth too often can weaken the enamel and you shouldn't brush straight after eating as this also weakens enamel.

My dentist said to avoid fruit juice other than a glass at breakfast, and to wait 30 minutes after eating before brushing teeth. It's surprising what is bad for teeth.

We use squash instead of fruit juice, which seems really unhealthy, but it doesn't have so much sugar and acid in it. And also go for chocolate rather than jelly type sweets if you're having a treat. But agree, may well be weak enamel and nothing to do with anything you've done.

I had a very austere '70s childhood with very few sweet things or drinks. I have a mouthful of fillings as an adult, despite brushing regularly. I think it's hereditary in a lot of cases.

Hope it goes well with the fillings.

Please don't feel bad, my then 6yr old had to have 3.....and I am a (non working) dental nurse! I really dropped the ball when her sister was born & didn't look after her teeth as well as I should have!

It happens, and unfortunately fruit, although better than sweets is a very good cause! Chocolate is actually better, as it doesn't linger on the tooth & in gaps.

Cheese is a very good snack. Plain Popcorn too.

I am sure he will be fine having it done.