What do I do?

[Nibbles83]

My husband has had a stag weekend away and he had the best time. I’m so jealous and got massive FOMO. Most of my friends have kids or don’t drink so wouldn’t want to go on a girl’s weekend letting loose, they’re just not interested.

Me on the other hand, no kids and wishing I could go away for a weekend with the girls but just no chance. Even my buddy at work who I used to have a couple of drinks with after work is pregnant. I feel bored and suppressed.

Any ideas?

You and the husband go away and let loose together.

Are you sure the friends with kids won’t want a night out?

Find some friends younger or older than you? So either no kids yet or older kids. Or go with your husband!

Gosh my friends would LOVE a weekend away from family for a couple days. Some seem inseparable for sure but are you really sure a friend or two wouldn’t welcome a break?
If not, there are organisations for solo women to go away and I bet more than one would be happy to let lose. Or, as PP suggest, go away with your DH.

On the rare occasions we meet up for dinner it feels rushed, must get home to the kid, “mum guilt”. No chance I can get them away for a weekend

Would be nice to have a girly one though

It isn’t going to change anytime soon if the hey all have kids or are just starting to have babies.
Go away either with your DH or on your own. Learning to be happy and have fun on your own is a fantastic life skill to have. If you don’t, you will miss out on a lot life has to offer and that brings regret.

So, if going with your DH doesn’t work for you, go and book an indulgent spa weekend for yourself - well worth doing as zero criticism!!!! Or maybe you would prefer to learn a skill - in which case book yourself a weekend away to really immerse yourself in that one thing. Or go somewhere you’ve always wanted to go. There is never a better time than now to book and have something to look forward to, rather than moaning at home alone. You never know, you may meet someone to have a fun chat with or an existing friend may just ask if they can go with you next time - because you went and had fun anyway.
one life. Live it. Don’t wait for others because that will never happen. (Even if it does - there will be complaints about it!)

Learn to love your own company and go away on your own for a few days

Learning to be happy and have fun on your own is a fantastic life skill to have. If you don’t, you will miss out on a lot life has to offer and that brings regret.

I agree. I travel and do stuff solo - art exhibitions, etc. - and love it. Met so many lovely people that way, even if only for a chat.

I'd hate to be lying on my death bed saying "I wanted to see the world but had no-one to join me."

That's great but humans are a social species so it's completely natural to want to be able to do things with other humans. I don't think it's helpful to shame people for that.

@compactmotif no one is shaming anyone. This is life advice gained the hard way.
Yes humans are social species - hence why three of us are all saying go and have that trip/holiday/experience even if you do it solo, BECAUSE you will get into conversations however long or short with other people and have social interaction and a shared experience. Sitting at home alone, wishing you had someone to do something you want to do, and getting FOMO is NOT a receipe for happiness. Plus is sitting at home alone means you don’t get any social interaction! If DH or someone else accompanies the op - fantastic! But don’t have regrets that you missed out because you held yourself back from enjoying your own company and what life does have to offer.

Not helpful now, but give it a few years and those friends will be desperate to go away for a girls weekend without kids 😆

Hopefully OP will explain it’s too late by then.

Once people start having kids, if you don’t want them yourself it can be so much easier to walk away from the friendship

They will be back and available again in a few years, but meanwhile you need some other friends for going out. Lots of women don't have children and older ones may be empty nesting.

Thats assuming you want to wait around for them to deign to take up with you again

To be fair, they are probably knackered if their children are very small.

Possibly but I wouldn’t wait around for however many years for someone with vastly different priorities.

agree with this.
you don't have to dump your old friends but just like they'll be making new mates at NCT/mum and baby groups/school gate you can make friends with people who have a more similar lifestyle to you at this moment in time.

My city has a thriving CF group but even if you don't want to be that specific, joining a group relevant to your interests will help you meet new people. If it's specifically travelling you would like to do more of you could do one of those tours aimed at solos etc.

Why would you waste time waiting for them to come out the other side?

Walk away when they are pregnant and there’s no conflict

Are you planning to have children too? You need some friends in the same situation as you.

Isn’t that when you make friends with other pregnant women/mothers?

Maybe there's local groups you can join on Facebook or advertised in your main library or other sites where people meet up for social evenings, walking , over 40s 50s get togethers/ hobby types, you can make friends from there and some might enjoy going out for a drink or weekend away Good luck