Celebrating being childfree

[Yippet]

Far too often society shuns women for choosing not to have children. I’ve been called selfish, a weirdo, crazy cat lady, will never know what real love is and my favourite “what you doing on mumsnet if you’re not a mother” etc

Let’s celebrate our choice without judgment and tell me the things you love about being childfree.

*Don’t want to offend anyone who is without children not by choice.
*This is not a parent/children bashing post

I’ll go first, I love

Getting up when I want on days off
Having money to spend on myself
If hungover not having to deal with anyone apart from feeding the cat
Time to myself
Freedom to go days out/trips/travel the world when I want
Quitting my job and going back to uni to retrain

I wanted to say, I do think there are people who thrive being parents. That it gives them meaning and purpose and they can juggle family life and work etc and be very happy and fulfilled.

I am not one of those people. In order to be happy and fulfilled, I need to be childfree.

Absolutely. And me too.

@Chewings
*I love that I don't have to worry about children.

My friends who are parents are always worried about something - it never ends!*

This is a huge thing for me. I remember as a teenager watching my grandmother, then a frail 80-something year old, worry herself sick over her son, my uncle , who was getting divorced. She was absolutely distraught and wanted to move heaven and earth to be with him. And I can remember thinking to myself that the worry of being a parent must never end. My pour grandmother didn’t have peace in what turned out to be the last few months of her life, because of her adult son. Who would choose that??

I think being childfree is the better way of living and, by my age (mid 40s), it feels unspoken among my friends that this is the case. Not that my friends with kids would wish them away (necessarily) but if they had their time again and knew what they know now...

So if there's any pity it's definitely not in my direction.

Any woman who wants to be free and financially comfortable and live fully for herself should think very carefully before having kids.

Awful that you've been called those names op! I can only think it's jealousy

Indeed. Everyone is selfish - some people are just better at planning how to meet their own needs.

Presumably at least some people who have kids do it because they’re meeting a need of their own - the ones who aren’t pushed into it through social pressures etc anyway.

In times past I was very happy to be able to travel overseas a few times, twice with my mother and three times on my own.

At all times I'm very glad to have nothing to do with children - I didn't like them when I was one! I'm also glad never to have to be on guard for my cats because there are children around.

I'm glad never to have been a parent; I'm not cut out for it and wouldn't want to inflict my efforts on a child. It's strain enough being my mother's carer.

It is a great thing and when times are tough, being childfree makes me feel better.

Today, I am doing some financial planning. I was going to stop work at 50, but it seems I can stop earlier than that 🤗

My friend ferrys her newly teenaged children to their sports stuff, she gets 2 evenings a week she isn't freezing her tits off watching a training session or a match. When she tells me about it it makes me so grateful to be childfree. My none work time is my own.

That was actually a key factor for me in the final decision. I can’t imagine anything more irritating than spending all your free time driving people around.

I absolutely love being childfree.

I'm an introvert and like others really don't like noise. I like nice food, nice wine, reading, yoga, and quiet. Honestly having children sounds like torture to me.

So much of it looks like drudgery, mess, body fluids, hassle, stress, noise, chaos, and drama.

Some of my friends have kids and several of them have admitted to regretting it, as much as they love their kids.

I'm incredibly happy with DH and my cat!

'So much of it looks like drudgery, mess, body fluids, hassle, stress, noise, chaos, and drama.'

Totally agree. We went to stay with my sister, BIL and 7 year old nephew recently. My nephew is just delightful and I love spending time with him. But their house is FULL of plastic tat, there is stuff everywhere, and he needs near constant attention / entertainment. I really don't think I could live like that. We didn't even see the Saturday morning football, and homework every evening, and birthday parties, and laundry, and hair washing, and the million other jobs that need doing every day or every week. I wouldn't swop my clean house and early nights and free time for anything

My brother and SIL had their child quite late, she was 43 and he was 49. Having seen how knackered they were all the time made me glad it didn’t happen for me, though I love DN who is 15 now to bits.

I also love being child free, and have never regretted my choice.

I find it interesting that quite a few posters have mentioned sleep. I am also someone who goes to bed early and has daytime naps whenever possible. I cannot imagine how unhappy, exhausted, stressed and unhealthy I would be with years and years of just not enough sleep.

If my foster cats keep me awake at night I can shut them in the living room where they have comfy beds & toys. And I’m not worried about whether they’re getting enough sleep.

Kids on the other hand….