First time poster - opinions on male childminers needed

[BandMsDad]

Good afternoon Mumsnetters !!!
First time poster here, just joined the forum but am feeling a little out of place as I'm not a Mum, I'm a Dad.

Just to give you a bit of background, I'm the proud dad of 2 boys (4 1/2 and 2) who are both in the same nursery 2 days a week, with a Nanny 2 days a week and looked after by my much better half for the remaining day.

Circumstances are due to change over the next 2 - 3 months when No1 son starts school in September and our Nanny leaves to start a new job to be closer to her family and friends. We've looked at various options (wrap around care at school for No1 son, hiring another nanny, childminder for No2 son who can pick up and drop off at school, going part time etc.....) but the best option we've come up with is I leave my current job (I'm a project manager) my better half continues to work (she's a lawyer) and I begin the process of becoming a registered child minder.

I've already set the ball rolling by speaking to the council to find out the next pre-registration days and by speaking to a neighbours sister who already works as a CM. I've found out that only 5% of child minders in the UK are male, so I was wondering what your experiences, feelings about and opinions are of male childminders ?

Sorry it's such a long first post, just trying to guage general feeling about this.

I know male CMS, and they are FAB

it's so good to have male role models in caring situations

Don't know any but would be perfectly happy to consider using one if I needed a CM. DCs need to see that childcare isn't just "women's work".

I wish there were more male staff at DS's nursery; all the staff are lovely but there are only two men and about fifteen women.

I echo what everyone has said. I would love DS to have soem more male role models in his life. All teh carers at his nursery, and all the teachers at our village school are male!

yyy do it

There's a real need for male childcarers imo but there will be a small portion of loons who will look at you funny for doing 'women's work' and at the same time happily stab someone who suggests women can't be lawyers or surgeons or soldiers or plumbers.

NannyNick is a mner who is a nanny - he is hugely knowledgeable about all sorts of stuff and has been nannying for yonks. And I imagine there are even fewer male nannies than childminders. Seek him out!

Thanks for the replies, very positive. I think realistically I could care for 2 children plus No2 son. I know it's not an easy choice but it's a great solution for looking after No2 plus I'm really excited about a total career change where I'd imagine I'd actually enjoy working !!

I've even started looking at people carriers with a view to trading in the Mazda so I can do the school runs, if needed :-)

BandMsDad
check out www.childmindingforum.co.uk
lots of male childminders on there.

I know a couple of male minders and they are fabulous and always full!!!

I'll be realistic and say it can be a tough sell. Having worked with children one way or another for 20 years I can say that reactions from parents is better now than it was in the past. However some parents won't ever consider a male carer.

You won't know how it is in your area until you try. Try not to be disheartened by those who cancel an appointment to meet you, once they realise you are male... just let them go to someone else, you don't want them anyway!

Get to know other childminders, so if they get enquiries they can't take they can pass the enquiry on to you.

I would suspect that most male childminders who are co-childminding with their female partner. Does anyone know of a male childminder whose partner is NOT a childminder?

i say go for it

imo it doesnt matter what sex a child carer is.... its how they are with the children!!!

Yes NannyNick, I know 7 male minders who do not co-mind.

There is a particuarly fun gent over on the childmindingforum who has struggled a bit getting initial work, until some colleagues stepped in (they are from the forum) and wrote an article about him for the local newspaper - he is now got his spaces filled and getting rave reviews.

My CM are a husband and wife team. I love what the male CM brings to the dynamic. I think it must be really nice for the over 8s to see/have a male CM.

Good luck!

Sorry that didn't really make sense about the over 8s. I think that the younger ones aren't really aware of male/female but the older children appreciate a male precence especially if they are from a single (Mum) parent family.

Sorry that didn't really make sense about the over 8s. I think that the younger ones aren't really aware of male/female but the older children appreciate a male precence especially if they are from a single (Mum) parent family.

And now I posted that twice. STEP AWAY FROM THE THREAD.

My husband works from home so is always around when I am working. When he first started working from home, one local minder told me quite categorically that parents would probably be very concerned if there was a "man" around the house all day.

I have to say that I have found the response from parents to be entirely the opposite and two of them have actually said that bringing their child to a house where there is an an adult male as well as a female is much more like a normal home environment.

I don't think my husband will ever get registered as a C/M but the children do love seeing him around and sitting eating meals together with us.

Yep agree with Pippin loads of knowledgable people on www.childmindingforum.co.uk, Great site, do join us :-)

Go for it! My husband works with me as my reg assistant and we get a great response from parents and other minders,its great for little ones who haven't got dad around full time. Good luck

I agree with Nick, there are still parents who dismiss the idea of a male carer without even considering meeting up and making an informed decision about it. That said, female childminders also face similar problems such as parents who won't consider a childminder who keeps animals or one who doesn't drive. So don't let this put you off.

If you haven't already been, I recommend you try and get some time off work and take your children to community groups - toddlers, soft play centres, toy librarys, library story times etc. Get talking to neighbours and parents of your children's friends. Being known in the community is the cheapest & best advert for a childminding business And having excellent relationships with local childminders is the next best ... might be worth meeting up with your neighbour's sister too and find out if there's a childminders drop in you can go to. Good way to start building friendships with colleagues

Best of luck, it can be tough for ANYONE starting out in childminding because parents like to go for people with lots of experience and recommendations. Open/character references from past employers and other contacts will be useful here. Some people take temporary jobs babysitting or at preschool/nurseries just to get a childcare related reference.

Love the idea of getting the newspaper involved! The NCMA can give advice on sending a press release if you want to take this route! Sorry, I'm even longer than your post

I think it can only be positive. You may come across prejudice but then lots of people do for all sorts of daft reasons.

I would just say that your post only talks about becoming a childminder because of logistics. I would recommend that anybody, male or female, who is considering childminding makes sure they are doing it for the right reasons. It is a very intense way to work. The days are long and there's no lunch break. If you are going to care for children for this long you have to really love being with them. I'm not saying this because you're male but because you don't mention loving being around children in your post.

If it is right for you then that is brilliant. I'm sure you'll get lots of great advice here. If you're in Worcestershire I'd be happy to help you out with your paperwork etc.

Blimey, thanks for all the replies and positive comments and suggestions. It's all really usefull.

To answer Al1son's point, I love spending time with my boys and seeing them develop and have lead a couple of trips to watch our local Rugby team for No1 Son and a couple of his friends from nursery. A real lads afternoon out that went brilliantly. I know you can't really compare a coupe of hours on a saturday afternoon to full time child minding, but I genuinely think this is the right move for me.

I figured that one of the biggest stumbling blocks may be lack of credible experience, but there are some great suggestions listed here that I'll look into.

I'll be on here a fair bit in the future so I'll keep you all posted.

If it helps at all, I used to be a chef so I can cook and couldn't care less about the world cup

Well in that case I say go for it!

I don't think lack of experience should be too much of a stumbling block. We all had to start somewhere!

Parents are looking for someone who has a genuine rapport with their child and often someone who shares their eothos on life. Most parents I have minded for made the decision to use me based on their gut instinct when the came to see my setting. The paperwork, first aid courses, child development knowlege etc, are important too but you'll probably find Ofsted care more than the parents about those things.

The cooking skills and thoughts on the world cup would be a great start for me! Can you fake the world cup enthusiasm if you need to? That would really be the acid test!

I think the hardest part could be faking enthusiasm for football, but I'm more than willing to give it a go.

Trouble is, I much prefer Rugby.....and I'm Welsh (not that being Welsh is a disability, or anything)

Take your points though, I have a pretty good rapport with my boys' friends and am fairly easy going. Always like to kneel down to talk to them so I'm 'on their level', if you see what I mean ? I often see alot of adults towering over children whilst talking to them, and I've often thought that could be a little intimidating to them.

Back to the sport for a sec though, I've played Rugby since I was 7 and reckon I can use the values that has taught me to help develop as a CM.
Just hope the lady from the council hurries up and sends through the details for the next pre-registration course.

I can't fake world cup enthusiasm... I tell anyone who asks that I hate football, rugby (and I'm Welsh by birth), come to think of it any sport really. I was never good at playing those back in my school days, so just didn't like them. Far more into science, technology and trains!
Mind you I do work out at the gym quite a bit these days... though that is only a recent development.

BandMsDad
"Always like to kneel down to talk to them so I'm 'on their level', if you see what I mean ? I often see alot of adults towering over children whilst talking to them, and I've often thought that could be a little intimidating to them."
You are getting the right idea already. When working with young children you need to get down on their level - that can mean rolling around on the floor!

Try to gain more experience whilst you await the pre-reg course. Help out at various groups, Children's Centre, Church, Youth Groups etc. It will help get to known in the community plus give you some experience of working with children of various ages.

Thanks Nick, good advice. I've applied for my pre-reg course on July 14th so I just need to wait to see if there's any spaces left.

Told work of my intentions, so I'm really going for it. Now to get myself out and about volunteering to get a bit of experience