Interesting point/question from the other thread

[Lifeinagoldfishbowl]

and also from recent experience of having had time of work and having had my boss fill in for me

For Nanny Employers / Nannies do your bosses

• Do you know what activities your children do on a day to day basis? Ie do you know that ballet is Wednesday's and Football is Friday mornings but term time only?

• Did you decide your child would do this activity/did your nanny choose it?

• Do you know your childs friends when they mention them and know where they live or where they meet up (thinking more of friends made whilst in the care of the nanny)

• Do you know what the plans are for this half term? Is this because you booked it/your nanny booked it and told you or are you just leaving it up to the nanny to decide during the week depending on the weather.

• If you couldn't get hold of your nanny would you know roughly where to find her ie at an activitiy class (you know where it's held or could find out the number) or be able to call another nanny/visit another nannies place of work etc to see if they knew.

yes my mb knows what activitys i do (throughout the week wedo tumbletots/tennis/music/gym/swimming) just as i know what she does on a thur/fri (ie swim)

we both chose to do a music and gym based one,and the gym one there was a space free on a day i worked and music then mb does on one of her days (as i work 3 days)

yes has met most of my friends/charges either at birthday partys or the teddy bears picnic i hold each summer at work, also has been around on ml and had an operation so worked from home for 3 months and saw my nanny/mummy circle often

no plans as im off but in the summer im working 9 days and i chose what to do tho mb did ask if we could fit in a tennis course for 3 mornings which i was fine with and chose a week to suit me

and yes have plans for beach/zoo/picnics/swimming/tennis as well as normal play dates and just chilling at home

wouldnt always know where i was (unless activity) but has several of my friends phone numbers so sure she could hunt me down if needed

basically my mb leaves me to it as this is my job,just as her boss leaves her to do her job - it comes down to TRUST

when ive been on holidays mb has done my week and knows my tuesday is MANIC and leave the house at 8.30 and not generally back till 5.30 where i throw tea at the kids and then leave at 6 to pick her up - tho obv she doesnt go and pick her self up, so tea is less stressful for her

• I have a timetable up in the kitchen with all our classes written on it - plus contact details below - incl tel/addresses of clubs so a quick look means mb knows where / when things are on

• I ( the nanny) chose all the activities although I do discuss with mb what progress we're making or if we're going to swap activities - she also makes suggestions.

• MB knows roughly who we talk about but can get confused as we have lots of friends with the same names

• Our plans for half term are the same as term time - although some of our groups aren't running so might have to do some extra trips to the zoo or the park. Plans are mentioned in passing, and placed on the noticeboard.

• MB would be able to check our timetable and has a rough idea where I would be - she also has numbers for several of our friends (nannies and mummy friends so could call those)

Will answer for my last job as this one is shared charge, 1 day a week, doing home-ed support!

• No, my bosses had no clue. I wrote them in the diary on a week by week basis in case there was ever a problem. I think she had a vague idea that he did some things at certain times but tbh he was old enough to say if I wasn't there (providing he remembered)

• They decided what he would do, it was up to me to find out when/where/how much and ask for a cheque.

• DB had no clue, MB, well, I have a feeling she didn't really. She knew the ones who lived in our street and the ones who came over to our house on a regular bassis. She definitely knew where one of them lived and that we usually met up in the park but otherwise no not really, although names/addresses/contacts were in the diary.

• It would have been my job to book things and investigate activities. I tended not to book far in advance as she wasn't above coming home and announcing she'd organised a treat but I had a bank of suggestions. I would usually check with her the night before any plans for the next day but some things were obviously weather dependent/needed extra cash. If I was proxy-parenting she wouldn't know.

• There would have been hell to pay if she couldn't have got hold of me. She would have been able to check the diary to see if we had a scheduled activity or playdate and cross-reference with the back to find the place we would be/other nanny's numbers. The only times I wouldn't have answered would have been swimming or the cinema so she'd try to ring a few times then text telling me to call.

That said I know my old MB let me have a very free reign (delegating was definitely her style...), my ex-ex-MB had me text here where we were going every time we left the house, booked all the activities and knew our timtable better than I did and current MB is around dealing with the other children so no need for me to sort anything! Depends on the person...

In my previous jobs I have done pretty much what frakkit said above. The parents said they would like little Jimmy to do swimming, tennis, golf and art, so I would research where/when/how much and let them know and ask for a cheque. In my current job I have been left to totally fill my days myself. I research what is age appropriate and available, book spots, pay (get reimbursed) and then present MB with our weekly schedule. She is 110% happy with it and loves that I plan a varied and fun week for her little munchkin as that means the day and half that she and DB have her at the weekend can just be quality time at home together or with their friends out on the boat. TBH I love the autonomy as I work best when I'm running the ship so to speak. And as MB and DB totally trust my judgement they are relaxed and happy to allow me to do pretty much whatever I like. They see their daughter is happy and healthy, so they know I am taking good care of her.

I am a MB but not sure that my input would be helpful as I don't think I have the usual 'nanny' situation. In fact, I would say that I have more of a mother's help/nanny than just a nanny.

*I do know the daily set activities as I have to drive the DS as nanny does not have a licence and in a slightly rural location. She could catch a bus, 20 minute round trip in the car (nursery drop off) would be just over 1 1/2 hours if by bus and another activity is 15 minutes away by car and would be well over 1 hour away if by buses.

• I chose the activities, was already attending before nanny was hired.

• I know all the friends as I generally make the playdates. I have suggested to nanny that she tries to meet some other nannies in the area and have even given her a link to a nanny forum which one of the nannies helpfully provided on MN once so that she could meet up with them and the children could play with each other but it hasn't happened yet.

• Nothing booked for half term yet, don't think nanny has thought about it but know we don't want to go to any place which would be extra busy because of the holidays. Have enough free time out of holidays to visit those places. I have a few ideas of what I would like to try, but nothing set and not yet discussed with nanny.

• Know where she generally is, but she has a phone which we have provided and we pay for so would always expect to be able to text her and receive one back fairly promptly.

But as I said, my situation is quite different!

Oh and part of the reason I take one of the DSs to an activity while she looks after the other DS at home so that I can spend some one on one time with my DCs.

its nice you can do one to one, tho tbh suprised you hired a nanny who cant drive if you really need one to be able to drive to do school runs etc

suprised she hasnt made any plans for ht and even more suprised she didnt take you up on the offer of meeting nannys local to her through nannyjob

Driving DS1 to nursery has given me the opportunity to meet other mums so I have enjoyed it. And the other activities are ones that I enjoy doing with the DCs.

At the moment her not driving is not a big deal, and she had agreed to take lessons before we hired her (she had done ad hoc babysitting before and she was really fabulous with my DS1). But she can't do it now due to her finances and I'm not comfortable with paying for her lessons.

Will I stay happy with it? Maybe, maybe not. But for the moment its ok. The mixed role of mother's help/nanny wouldn't be appealing to most nannys so I think I am quite fortunate to have found someone who genuinely likes and is good with with my DCs, is willing to do some housework (not just for the DCs), doesn't mind the MB being around (that's quite a big one for most nannys!!!) and who I actually genuinely like (most of the time ).

• Yes

• We chose the activities.

• Yes

• Yes. They still have classes and we have set up playdates as DH is a teacher and will want to do things with them.

• No, I don't know where she is EVERY SECOND of the day but our nanny would never dream of not having her mobile charged and with her. I can't even imagine being in this situation. Our AP is slightly less reliable in this regard and it was the nanny who pulled her up on it and stressed the importance of her/us always being able to get in touch with her. So, a very unlikely scenario and one I wouldn't tolerate.