about to employ a live-in nanny. advice needed please on accomodation etc

[silverfrog]

well, we are hopefully to soon be employing a nanny, anyway. advertising currently.

so, accomodation wise - what will she be expecting? we have a nice house, but Buckingham Plaace it ain't

We have set aside: bedroom (obviously!). Has double bed, chest of drawers, small wardrobe. It isn't the hugest of rooms, but not pokey either.

Since it is not a large room, we also have a second room set aside (next door, and leading through into bathroom - nanny's own, not shared) as a sort of sitting room. this is not so that nanny will never spend any time with us in evenings - more so that she has space that is not her bedroom for her evenings/weekends should she choose to spend them in the house.

We have put a small table and chairs in, a comfy chair, will have TV/DVD player sorted. A bookcase and a bureau/desk.

How does that sound? Is there anyhting we shold be considering?

what would you want in your room?

What bathroom is she using?
As live in, I HATE sharing a bathroom. Would give up a sitting room for my own bathroom.

What ground rules have you set? E.g. visitors, overnight guests, internet use etc
If you do not let her have visitors over then she will not last long. Opposite sex (or same sex if that is her preference) people sleeping over is a big thing too. I don't do it as I find it wierd but each to their own.

If the nanny is not local to the area then get bus maps etc for her to familiarise herself with the area.

Write out a manual that shows/tells where everything is. Schools, fusebox, doctors numbers etc.

Do you have a petty cash stash or will she have a card linked to your account?

Have you a diary ready for her to write the days events in.

That sounds lovely - especially the second chill-out room!

Off the top of my head thoughtful finishing touches - pretty bedlinen, decent curtains, a rug on the floor, picture on the wall and a bedside lamp - go a long way to making the place look welcoming and homely.

Would you consider a sofabed/futon type thing (if you allow friends to stay over) in the second room? That way they don't have to share nanny's bed or sleep on the floor!

A kettle in the sitting room would be nice so she doesn't have to go through the house every time she wants a cup of tea/instant hot chocolate. A mini-fridge for milk would also be handy - with enough space for milk and chocolate! If you're feeling really lovely you can ask her favourite type of chocolate at interview as a random question and then put some in the fridge to welcome her [warm, fuzzy memories emoticon]

Could you spare a few books for the bookshelf? Chicklit/second hand bookstore finds would probably be fine - I don't know how much stuff she'll bring with her. Or of course if you end up with a male nanny then a few blokey reads (bit hazy on details, poss not military history/theories of war like my DH). That was one of the nicest things I ever found upon arriving, after the mini-fridge with chocolate.

TBH as a nanny I wouldn't expect the second room. My last live in job in the family's house I had a bedroom with fitted wardrobe, single bed, chest of drawers and lamp beside the bed then they eventually go their act together to provide a TV and an ensuite bathroom. It was nicely decorated and adequate, but really impersonal.

You sound like such a lovely employer caring about your nanny's room Good luck with your search!

thanks for the replies.

nanny will have own bathroom - she is on a separate floor to the rest of us anyway, the only other room up there is the guestroom, so she will be mostly undisturbed. Bathroom is not to be shared, btw - access to it is from nanny's sitting room, so we consider it to be her own. guests will have ot pop downstairs to the family bathroom.

we have house file anyway, as we are renting and landlords are really organised. so fusebox layout etc all detailed in htere.

hadn't thought of bus maps etc. we too are new to area, so might not be much help with those! but we can try.
things like bedside lamp, rugs etc are a given.

hadn't thought about kettle and/or mini fridge - very good point. If it were me, the last thing I'd want to do on weekends etc would be to traipse through the house disturbing the family (NOTE this is not how I feel about a nanny doing htis, but how I would feel if I were the nanny!) will sort that out.

haven't yet thrashed out friends/partners staying over. dh and I have talked baout it, but he is away now until end of week.

tbh, as long as I don't have to do the preparation, and as long as furniture is treated well (and why wouldn't it be?) I owuld have no problem with guests using guest room, I think (as long as we don't have anyone booked fo rthat time, obviously!) It would make no difference ot me, as long a snanny did the sheets/towels etc (which she owuld do for her guests if staying on a futon, anyway)

do you think I should put up picutres/books on shelves?

we have plenty to spare (and nanny is more than welcome to borrow any books that take her fancy). I worry that she will end up hating the picture/book selection but be too polite to sya anything

I would put something up/there because any picture or book is more inviting than bare shelves BUT do make it clear that she should feel free to change anything she doesn't like and borrow your books!

My last live-in wasn't a great job but my abiding memory is walking into that impersonal blank room and thinking 'oh fuck, this is home now?'. Didn't really get it off to a good start....

Most nannies (well the good ones anyway ) won't want to hang around with you on weekends anyway. I have to traipse down to the kitchen to get a cup of tea but I do it before anyone is up.

It sounds like you have it all planned out. I hope your find a great nanny.

She may come with her own sheets, towels etc. I did but put some out for her anyway. It is easier if she has her own sets too.

Aww you sound so lovely and considerate

I have only lived in once and was when my live out job moved ad I went with them for 8 weeks

the chill out room sounds fab and if a sofa bed/futon then be nice for friends to stay. A kettle is a MUST ad a fridge fab idea.

You do sound lovely setting the nannys room up nicely I moved to a live in job once and there were dull grey sheets on the bed and nicked from the local hospital towels for me to use, which was not the warmest welcome!

In my new job there was a big bunch of flowers in a vase and a box of Body Shop products waiting for me in my room. Some nice pictures on the wall and a small clock and maybe a handset for the house phone if your happy for the nanny to use the phone would be usefull, saves on the shouting up the stairs when a call comes in for her. Would definatly put some books/DVDs/nice magazines out for the nanny to use. A fridge in the lounge would be great as would a kettle and I have even had a toaster in my room to do breakfast at the weekend.

You all had such lovely room to come to! I had to strip the bed from the last person using it and clean it from top to bottom as it had not been done.

Aww lou. That's awful

really disrespectful tbh

Well I can beat you lou

I was in the the part of the house which was been totally renovated so had to pass through a building site of dust and dirt to get to my room. No carpet, no curtains/blind and no bloody heating. Bathroom was new but no loo seat and no blind.

Needless to say I didn't stay long.

Silverfrog. Your accommodation sounds lovely.

My accomodation as a live in nanny was was separate with my own bathroom. I remember walking in to find a whole bookcase of books (all genres) and a vase of flowers. I felt at home straight away and had a fantastic year (it was a year long contract) and look back with great fondness on the family I was with.

My second job was awful. I arrived and started unpacking my clothes (please note I am very tidy, friends call me 'Monica') and the mother marched through and slammed the door saying "I don't want to look at your mess! I was mortified and it set the tone for the rest of my time there.

My room was next to the fathers office - I had to go through this to go to the loo/bathroom and he would often work until the early hours of the morning keeping me awake.

I stayed for a month and cried almost every day I was so unhappy.

You are doing the right thing, privacy is very important and gives the nanny somewhere to 'escape' to. Also please impress on DC's that the nanny's 'home' is private and to be entered by invite.

Hope that doesn't sound too grand - but DC's don't always understand the term 'morning off work'!

You sound great though, very thoughtful

thanks everyone, this has given me a good idea of what we should be doing.

list made, now to get organising (we only moved in here a few weeks ago, and the nanny's rooms are yet to be sorted...)

re: children giving the nanny space on days off - that's why we thought separate floor would be good (nanny on top floor, rest of us in the middle).

But dd1 will take some training - she's quite severely ASD (post obviously advertised as SN nanny), so hopefully we'll get someone who understands that we're trying our best with that one!

most live in nannies i know that when in evenings/weekend/time off have a rule that if door is open then kids can knock and go in/say hello etc

but if the nanny wants privacy/time out ignore the children etc then door was shut and mustnt knock

i would also advice getting a lock on inside of door so nanny can lock if doesnt want a little hand to open the door and disturb

sounds like lovely accomadation

more than what most live in nannies i know get

It sounds like you have a lovely plan and will make a lovely employer.

With regards to your daughter having ASD I am sure if you set some rules and it becomes part of the house routine not to go upstairs to the nannies room unless invited she will be fine as it will be part of the normal day to day routine and rules of her life.

Hope all is going well with the move from having a sibling with ASD know how difficult a house move can be all the upheavful isnt easy on anyone least of all them so hope things settle down for you and also you get a nanny willing to commit long term for you.

Thanks everyone.

House move went well, thanks, eastmidlandsnanny. Dd1 (and dd2 for that matter) was a real star. Took it all in her stride once we explained what was happening, and has settled down well. Mind you, she's a pro - this is the 5th house she's lived in, and she's only 5

That was exactly why we thought the nanny on a separate floor would work - dd1 doesn't go up there now (unless following me when making beds etc) so there would be no reason for hee to think she should go up there (fingers crossed)

Glad house move went well - 5 houses hey sounds like house moving has become part of her normal life- she will be expecting you to move again in a year!!

I dont pity you hate moving house!

good luck with everything and hope you find a fab nanny.