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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

Advice needed please

18 replies

pinksmarties · 03/03/2010 10:20

Hello, I'm a cm and fetch 2 sibblings from school. They are lovely and I have a very good relationship with their parents.

The other day mum said that one child wanted to do a class after school so I wouldn't have her on that day and so as I wouldn't have to feed her etc could I deduct the fees for that day.
I was taken aback but said ok. I really value her custem, she's lovely, so are the kids, I couldn't wish for better, and she pays cash so no annoying vouchers although I think she actually would like to use vouchers.

Yesterday she said child 2 wanted to do a class after school too, once a week just for an hour and would be brought to me by another parent when the class was over.

She assumed that she could deduct payment for that too and I was a bit dumbstruck so didn't say anything.

She paid me yesterday with the deductions which actually leaves me £100 a month short.

As I said, I don't want to loose her but I know they're not well off and I know there are are cheaper cms than me which she could use.

Not sure what to do or say, I'm starting to feel peed off.

Any advice would be welcome, I'm seeing her later.

OP posts:

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FabIsDoingPrettyWell · 03/03/2010 10:27

Who is going to pick the child up if they become ill or the class is cancelled at short notice? If she expects you too then she has to pay you as a retainer imo.

Original poster

pinksmarties · 03/03/2010 12:03

Thanks, yes I hadn't thought of that.

OP posts:

Poledra · 03/03/2010 12:06

I pay my CM when my children are in classes after school as she is in loco parentis - i.e. she is still responsible for my daughter and, as Fab says, is the one who will go get her if there is a problem etc.

That said, my CM only charges half-price for the 3 mornings a week my DD2 is in preschool, but this is her own policy and not something I requested.

onadayliketoday · 03/03/2010 12:29

If the child is ill they should not go to the Child Minder anyway. (Perhaps they should not be in school either?).

The mother would probably suggest paying for the session only if the class was cancelled.

My stance would be to tell the mother that as I couldn't offer the time to someone else as it is only one afternoon per child then you still require payment. It's a difficult one though, if you think she might give notice if you wanted to be paid for that day. Do you look after them in the School Holidays as well?

If so she will possibly expect to bring the two children on each of the days she used to use. In that case a retainer in school time for those days would be appropriate.

ayla99 · 03/03/2010 12:29

I charge session fees after school - I drop off at rainbows, football etc but I can't have another child while the child is at the activity.

So parents pay me £15 for the 3-6pm regardless of how much time they use. That way, if the club is cancelled or the child quits, the space is here for them.

In any case, if the parent drops hours or days this should be done by terminating the current contract (with the required notice) and then agreeing a new one. Just as you would give the required notice if you were upping/changing your fees.

llllll · 03/03/2010 12:37

I had the same problem with an after schooler. I didn't charge when he went to his football club which was on a set day every week. Then it changed to a different day so I explained to the mum that if she wanted me to be available every day then she would have to pay for that space. She wasn't happy in fact she was quite rude to me. Sometimes these clubs are for one term only to let other children attend.

Original poster

pinksmarties · 03/03/2010 12:45

I don't have them in the school holidays but I did have them for a couple of snow days and charged her as if I was looking after 1 and not 2, ie half price as they are so good and don't need looking after in the way that pre schoolers do.

I also sometimes drive them home if she needs me too as a favour.

Maybe I should just thank my lucky stars that I've got them at all but it is bugging me and I'm not good at all this money side of things.

OP posts:

Danthe4th · 03/03/2010 12:59

Pink you made a mistake the day you only charged for 1 child when it snowed 'because they are good' you kind of set yourself up for under charging and driving them home as a favour. She is using you.
Put the balance back by doing a contract review and getting paid in advance for what is contracted and making it clear that you may not be available if the after school class is cancelled if she does not book it.

lollipopmother · 03/03/2010 13:44

Yes it's funny how you do people a favour and instantly it starts a sticky slope to them taking the pss - I'm with Dan*, she's trying it on because she knows she can.

Original poster

pinksmarties · 03/03/2010 14:54

Yes thankyou Danthe4th and everyone, you're right. Why do people think its ok to take the p*ss. She's also phones sometimes to say she'll be late because of traffic etc and I always say fine don't worry, which I do mean.

I think its almost harder having a good relationship with a client as the lines can get blured.

OP posts:

lollipopmother · 03/03/2010 14:57

Definitely, it's difficult being ruthless sometimes. Last week my mindee was off ill for all of his days and although I say I charge half when they're ill I do feel bad about it. I found myself texting the parents saying that if they want to increase his days to make up for it then I wouldn't charge for the sick days , as if I can actually afford to be off work for three full days! Luckily they either didn't get the text or didn't take it up because they paid as they should have AND took up extra days, phew!

Ivykaty44 · 03/03/2010 15:05

my dd goes to an afterschool club, I pay termly and if I pay in the first week of term then I get a 5% discount. If though my dc is off sick form school - I do not get a refund.

If I want to cancel a day afterschool I can with a half terms notice, then I do not have to pay for that afternoon - so if my dd started football after school on a Wedneday and didn't go to after school club then I would have to pay for the first half temr and give notice - then not pay afte that.

I am not sure why you want your parent to pay for her child to be with you - when they are not with you? Sorry

lollipopmother · 03/03/2010 15:51

Ivykaty But you're still paying for your child even though they aren't attending, it's just that you only have to pay for half of the term. I think if there was a notice period then the OP wouldn't have minded but ultimately she's gone from having the kids to suddenly not and thus not being paid even though she hasn't had time to fill their space with someone else. I think that parents don't always realise how hard it is to cope financially when people just pull their kids out with no warning.

Original poster

pinksmarties · 03/03/2010 17:37

Spot on lollipop thank you. x

OP posts:

Ivykaty44 · 03/03/2010 19:21

but what is in the op's contract? Is it a half temr notice or a few days?

what I am saying is if I give the correct notice then I dont pay - if though I dont give notice I mustpay for a place that she isn't attending cos thats what i signed up for.

Did the op put in the contract that it was to be a few days or a half temr or a month?

onadayliketoday · 03/03/2010 21:52

Ivykaty44, most Childminding contracts contain a clause which states that a notice period is required for changes to the contract, in just the same way that your contract with the after school club does.

The parent of the children pinksmarties looks after should have paid for the session for the notice period, just as you were required to do by the after school club In this case the parent did not give any notice, but simply said the children would not be attending one evening per week and reduced the fees herself. It's possible that pinksmarties does not have such a clause in her contracts but this seems unlikely.

I have a mindee who opted to join two extra curricular activities per week at school. If I had filled her place on those two days the parents would have had problems as she only did the activities for a few weeks before dropping them. There were also a few sessions cancelled because the staff member running the activities was off work. It's probably better to forgo the relatively small saving made for one after school session for the peace of mind of knowing that the place is still there if your child needs it.

Ivykaty44 · 03/03/2010 22:05

Then why doesn't the op use the clause, I am sure if I did this with the afterschool club they would soon terminate my contract - and rightly so.

I couldn't go to work if it wasn't for the after school club and there are no cm around here.

I know that they had a copupe of parents take the p**s and not turned up till 7pm when the club finishes at 5.45. So they sent a letter out to every parent stating that they would call both police and ss if the child was still with them at 6.30pm as it wasn't fair on either child or staff. It hasn't happened again.

A letter though is soemtimes better at outlining a rule and if you send it out to all the parents telling them what the rules are this may make them realise that they can't just drop an afternoon adhoc and then restart again and if they want the place kept open they will need to pay.

Could the op send a letter out stating the rules so it doesn't happen again?

Original poster

pinksmarties · 04/03/2010 08:53

Yes I do have that clause but I didn't want to start getting all official with her.

I mentioned it yesterday that I could't keep the place open for child one and she said ok that's fine.

Thankyou for all your responses.

OP posts:

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