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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Can we talk au pairs? How does it work?

21 replies

lowrib · 11/02/2010 11:46

So how does having an au pair work exactly?

Am I right in thinking

  • they are usually young women (can be men) looking to come to the UK and learn English
  • you welcome them into your family, help them find an English course etc
  • they help with the DCs
  • you don't pay them a wage as such but give them a small amount of money each week

Have I understood it correctly?

I have some questions ..

  • How many hours work a week would be acceptable?
  • Do they do the same things a nanny would (e.g. school pick up) or is it just meant to be help while you're there too?
  • How much do you pay them?
  • How do you go about finding one?
  • anything else you think I should know?!

I'm totally new to this. We're just looking at childminders for the first time, but later this year we're going to move into a bigger place and it occurred to me that an au pair might be an option.

Any advice would be gratefully received!
TIA

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
lowrib · 11/02/2010 12:06

anyone?

OP posts:
iheartdusty · 11/02/2010 12:26

What you have described was how it used to be.

Now, changes to employment & visa laws and the European Community mean that an au pair is more usually:
a person from an EU country with a right to work in the UK; or
a young person from Australia/ New Zealand/ Canada (poss USA?) who is eligible for a visa under the Youth Mobility Scheme (which means they have to have a stash of money and can work for up to 2 years in UK);

may be relatively unqualified in childcare, but could be anywhere from a trained teacher to a teenager who has done some babysitting;

and is an employee of the household who expects to live in BUT who generally works for so few hours that his/her earnings don't come up to tax/nat insurance levels.

English courses may or may not feature.
Hours per week are up to you, but typically would be 20-30;
the au pair is entitled to minimum wage (save that live-in domestic staff have different rules), paid holidays, and all other employment rights.

mumof2222222222222222boys · 11/02/2010 12:28

There are lots of threads on this. So I would suggest you have a flick through some of them. also go on a couple of websites to see what they say. a lot of MNetters seem to use Au Pair World. I have used Au Pairs by Pebbles several times, and am happy with the service they ahve provided.

  • they are usually young women (can be men) looking to come to the UK and learn English YES
  • you welcome them into your family, help them find an English course etc YES
  • they help with the DCs YES and a bit of cleaning.
  • you don't pay them a wage as such but give them a small amount of money each week NO. THEY are your employee, but min wage doesn't apply. You pay them by means of board and lodging AND a wage. We pay ours £70 per week. We also pay her when we are on holiday / she is on holiday. Those dates coincide.
  • How many hours work a week would be acceptable? 25 - 30.
  • Do they do the same things a nanny would (e.g. school pick up) or is it just meant to be help while you're there too? Mine does pick up and drop off and about 2 hours looking after them in the evening before I get home. No sole charge (or v limited) of under 3s. Also 2 nights babysitting a week.
  • How much do you pay them? Me £70 pw, but factor in cost of food, car insurance etc.
  • How do you go about finding one? I use agency and pay agency £25 monthly.
  • anything else you think I should know?!
Are you happy to share your house with a stranger? See other posts for interesting AP stories!

It works for us, and I suspect we'll be having APs for the next 10 years or so.

frakkinaround · 11/02/2010 12:28

That's basically the concept of an au pair but they do count as employees (workers if you want to be technical, but same difference under employment law)

That means they get a wage - not subject to NMW as live in - and a contract, paid holidays etc. If you pay them over the threshold you need to factor in tax and NI but most APs don't get paid that much. Pay depends where you are, rural locations might need more perks to attract and keep an AP!

  • How many hours work a week would be acceptable?

Most au pairs work around 25 hours a week, 5 hours a day and not weekends. They can work more, unless they're from Romania or Bulgaria, as there's no legal restriction. A max of 35 hours as a general rule, otherwise they would have no time for English classes! They could do more in the holidays but it would be courteous to pay them more.

  • Do they do the same things a nanny would (e.g. school pick up) or is it just meant to be help while you're there too?

Depends on the capabilities of an au pair. Most are capable of doing help with morning routine, school drop off, some household chores a nanny wouldn't do, school pick up and preparing a simple tea. As a general rule au pairs shouldn't have extended sole charge of young children.

  • How much do you pay them?

Where are you? Anywhere between £60 and £100 a week, depends on experience, hours and any other perks.

  • How do you go about finding one?

You can look by yourself on greataupair.com, aupairworld, nannyjob, gumtree etc. Or you can use an agency. Even if you use an agency check their CV and references thoroughly yourself and do double check the legal advice agencies give as some of them are very suspect.

  • anything else you think I should know?!

Don't think of it as a cultural exchange. You will have an employee and a live in one at that. Are you prepared to have another adult/teenager in your house? Younger au pairs can be quite unreasonable and need a lot of hand-holding because they are still quite young. Look for an au pair who has some experience with children your age such as youth groups and not just babysitting and who's had a job before. French ones may have worked as an 'animatuer/animatrice' which is GREAT experience. Test their level of English in writing AND on the phone.

You'll want a good handbook and chores list so the au pair has something written to refer back to. You can't always rely on them having understood what you've said. If it's written then they can look up things they don't understand in a dictionary. It's also worth setting aside a while to show them HOW you like things done.

Good luck!

frakkinaround · 11/02/2010 12:33

iheartdusty not USA. The tiered visa system includes only NZ, Aus, Canada and Japan for Tier 5.

You may get applications from students on other courses who are here with a different Tier visa. Unless you are completely comfortable with checking their immigration status and them prioritising their HE studies I would avoid them. Those can only work up to 25 hours a week.

iheartdusty · 11/02/2010 12:34

sorry, I meant to add;

The amount of child care and duties would depend on your needs and their abilities. Typically someone who calls themself an au pair might not have any childcare qualifications and not much experience, so you probably wouldn't entrust a young child to their sole care. But you might be perfectly happy with them picking up a school child and looking after them on their own for a while.

Some other families want help with housework to be the main thing rather than child care. As long as it is all clear and agreed up front, it shouldn't be a problem.

Pay varies but IME outside London for a live-in au pair doing 20 - 25 hours a week you would expect to pay £70-80 p/w on top of all the au pair's board and lodging, possibly to insure them to drive your car, maybe you might throw in gym membership, a travel card, whatever is relevant to your circumstances.

I have always used aupairworld.net or gumtree. There are plenty of agencies around as well.

Bonsoir · 11/02/2010 12:35

A friend of mine (a seasoned au pair employer) likes young au pairs, fresh from living with their parents - she says they are more biddable and have higher standards of hygiene and domestic order. A few years at university and apparently they are bolshy and filthy

iheartdusty · 11/02/2010 12:37

cross-posted!

thanks for clarification re USA.

DadInsteadofMum · 11/02/2010 12:52

One day I will beat both Frakkin and Millarkie to one of these threads - as ever all I can say is everything Frakkin has said is spot on.

I would prefer not to have an au pair straight from home who has always had all their meals cooked for them and their room tidied but would rather have one that has been out into the big wide world and had to cope for themselves .

Bonsoir · 11/02/2010 12:55

I suspect that depends on the particular tasks you wish them to accomplish, and the extent of the initiative and sense of responsibility you wish them to display.

lowrib · 11/02/2010 13:00

That's really useful stuff, thanks everyone!

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Lizcat · 11/02/2010 13:22

Everyone else has covered the legal stuff. Personally had disastrous experiences with Au pair world and Gumtree people saying they are coming and then changing their minds, but not bothering to tell us.
I now use Just Au Pairs great agency really helpful yes not as cheap, but all Au Pairs have CRB check etc in own country.
I find you need to take the first week off work to help them settle in find their college etc. It will then take 6 to 8 weeks for Au pair and DCs to settle together.
Younger APs are more willing to get and floor and play Barbie etc, older APs are able to function independantly much quicker. Whatever age they are they will have dramas and tears (remember what life was like 18 to 25 years old).
We have had some great APs and keep in contact with several one we visit regularly in France.

Pollyanna · 11/02/2010 13:27

I always get my au pairs from gumtree.

I agree with what others have said on this thread - I would always go for an older au pair, have only had disastrous experiences with 18 year olds. (and when I think back to myself at 18, I'm not surprised).

HarrietTheSpy · 11/02/2010 14:32

I think very few agencies are as up to speed as MNetters seem to be on the fact that APs are technically employees and I do not believe this is what APs are anticipating when they get here. Based on my albeit relatively limited experience (one and a half-ish APs), I think you need to expect they could be hoping for time with the family and trips out, i.e. the cultural exchange/part of the family component which has historically been a feature of the whole thing. So, I would clear this up before he/she arrives.

One of the families we know with an au pair that is happiest with whole set up was particularly keen on the cultural side of things, as opposed to principally needing a childcare solution. This suits the AP too.

lowrib · 11/02/2010 14:46

So if the au pair is actually an employee, can you claim a percentage of the money you give them from Tax Credits, in the same way you would with a childminder or nanny?

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frakkinaround · 11/02/2010 15:03

Only if they're OFSTED registered. For this they will need:

A core skills course such as the ICP
A paediatric first aid certificate
A CRB (can be difficult)
Insurance

You will probably need to cover the cost of everything except the insurance, which is £70ish, which will cost you around £350 all told.

lowrib · 11/02/2010 15:10

Oh I see! I had a feeling the answer would be no, but I wasn't sure why!

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frakkinaround · 11/02/2010 15:22

It's not impossible, just really unusual! Some nannies aren't registered so you wouldn't be able to use vouchers for them either.

DadInsteadofMum · 11/02/2010 18:03

I think you can do employee and do the part of the family/cultutal experience things.

I make sure all the legal stuff is covered (contract, 28 days paid holiday etc.) but then always invite them with us when we go out at the weekend (stressing that whatever the kids see it is optional and their decision alone).

But by maintaining a proper employee relationship it has meant the one (of the 4 and a sixth so far) that didn't work out (huge homesickness) was terminated by mutual agreement with a notice period (meaning I had time to get a replacement) as per the contract.

lowrib · 11/02/2010 18:04

Having thought about this a bit more, I think a childminder is right for us now. DS is young (he'll be about 18mo when we move into the bigger place), we're earning less at the moment with me at home, and childcare vouchers will contribute towards a CM, so an Au Pair will actually cost us more money for possibly a poorer service - certainly far less experienced.

I think we'll think about au pairs again later - maybe when DS goes to school. It will suit us better then with DS being older. Also we'll be earning more, and so the tax credits won't make such a difference.

HarrietTheSpy I do like the cultural side of it. If we do go down the au pair route later I certainly would want to make them feel part of the family, and help them get the most out of their time here.

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HarrietTheSpy · 11/02/2010 21:17

Just to be clear,I wasn't saying you can't do the employee and the family/cultural thing, I was simply saying that I think many APs do come at the situation with some expectation of a cultural exchange being part of it, and it's best to have a think about what you can offer as a family on that front and that your expectations match the ap's.

OP if this is of interest to you, I think it's definitely worth revisiting it at a later date, as you may really find it works for you.

But it sounds like you've made the right decision for now re childminder if your children are pretty young.

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