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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Gah - two good candidates, but each with glaring faults! WWYD?

39 replies

Pennies · 06/02/2010 14:12

OK candidate no. 1 - heaps of experience with children of all ages, but mainly babies (although has done older children of similar age to mine). She has to date preferred to temp, with only two long term jobs. She is older and has life experience - which we need, but never done nanny / housekeeping, but I think will rise to the challenge well. She's CRB checked and got her NNEB and first aid qualifications. Very strong character that I will have to make sure doesn't dominate over me, even though i also have a strong character. She is more expensive AND wants more money than we're offering (she's used to temp rates) and has agreed a compromise rate, which I think doesn't bode well for her longer term loyalty - loyalty is key here (need her to stay with us through my chemo treatment and beyond, so at least a year).

Candidate no. 2 - first foray into formal childcare. Looks after a mum at school's DD (babysitting, playing with her to give mum a break occasionally) and looks after her nephews. She also used to work for the same mum in an office job. The Mum says she's hardworking and very loyal and highly recommended her. Her CV shows she's stayed in jobs for good periods of time. She seems kind and got on well with the children. However she's younger, and a bit green to it all. We weren't 100% convinced that she wanted to get into childcare, but we didn't feel she'd not get on well once in it IYSWIM. She's a whopping £8k cheaper than no.1.

DD1 liked candidate nno. 2, DD2 liked no. 1. Typical.

There's the option of choosing neither of course, but we've been looking for 6 weeks now and need someone ASAP.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
ChippingIn · 08/02/2010 19:20

Pennies - there has been an overwhelming 'vote' for #2, however, as someone else mentioned, it could be just the way you worded your OP, regardless of what you were talking about (nanny, house, car) you were 'selling' #2 better.

I think more along the lines of what your best friend said. Having someone who can just get on with it and do everything as you would on the days you are feeling rough, beats having someone 'mouldable'.

Also, there can be on MN (hmm, not sure how to put this without offending the masses...), but there can be a strong tendancy to want a nanny you can 'control/mould/micro manage' when sometimes people would do well t remember being a nanny is a job/career and (some/most) nannies are good at what they do.

My suggestion would be to invite them both back for a second interview with your best friend there and the girls for part of it and then make a decision. When making your decision listen to what your bf & girls say (take into consideration which of your girls will 'need' the nanny most (or which girl is least adaptable) and listen to your gut.

Who do you LIKE?

mistlethrush · 08/02/2010 19:55

On the basis of what you've put in your post, I'd go for No2, and, if necessary, help her out with getting a cleaner for a couple of hours twice a week.

I would also have a BIG list of things to do that you would like her to do with your dd - cooking, painting, puzzles, reading etc etc etc, and a list of things for her to do outside the house - ideally sort out a number of activities for the younger one - music groups, gym, etc etc - there are likely to be times when you will find it a relief just to know you have the house to yourself for a few hours and can just snooze on the sofa.

However, you might not have been selling No.1 very well! And she might be the ideal person to just sort things out when you're not feeling good.

frakkinaround · 08/02/2010 20:34

IME strong willed mothers andcstrong willed nannies clash unless singing from exactly the same hymn sheet. When it works it works brilliantly but when it hoes tits up it's horrendous.

However as you are going to be at home it's whoever you get on best with and won't mind having around the house.

FabIsGoingToBeFabIn2010 · 08/02/2010 20:37

No 2 definitely

FabIsGoingToBeFabIn2010 · 08/02/2010 20:41

I also think with number 2 you will have money to give her extra as a bonus if and when she deserves it and that goes a long way to make you do that extra mile. Nanny 1 would probably think quite right too when you gave it to her.

allaboutme · 08/02/2010 20:47

no 2 definitely

MollieO · 08/02/2010 20:54

I would choose 2 because you have the potential to mould her into the nanny you want. No 1 will do that to you - mould you to the family she wants. Might be fine but may be an almighty clash.

nbee84 · 08/02/2010 21:03

I still think one of my biggest concerns with nanny 1 is that she may not stick around for the year. She is going to be earning less than she usually gets and doing a job that is also harder work than her usual nanny jobs given the housekeeper aspect of the job. The op really does not want to be into a course of chemo and looking for a new nanny.

I take Chippin's comment about nanny being able to take over completely if you are very rough, but as frakkin pointed out unless you are singing off exactly the same hymn sheet it has the potential to be a very stressful time for you if things are not being done how you would like.

Pennies · 08/02/2010 22:06

I decided against no. 1. Mainly because of potential for personality clash.

No.2 coming over for a full day trial this week and on the same day a local nanny who isn't able to do this job (gutted, coz she was utterly lovely) is coming over to talk to her about what I want because she has done exactly what I'm after (looking after family with a mum in my boat).

OP posts:
mistlethrush · 08/02/2010 22:20

I think that the last thing you want, when feeling unwell, is someone in your house doing things in a way that you wouldn't choose. I hope it works out with #2!

FabIsGoingToBeFabIn2010 · 09/02/2010 08:12

Good call Pennies and your other local nanny sounds lovely to help.

Blondeshavemorefun · 09/02/2010 16:06

hope trial goes well

kkey21 · 14/02/2010 13:51

Hi Pennies

How are you getting on? I am local to you and able to work 2 days a week for the next few weeks if you are stuck?

x

chitchat07 · 17/02/2010 16:02

No 2!

No 1 sounds like she has the potential to be a real pain in the rear. If you are worried that you won't be able to stand up to her now, what will it be like when you are going through treatment? Not to mention that you will be in the home, and lots of experienced nannies find it hard to have a parent at home while they are working.

We have a 'new' nanny, but she used to work in a nursery. She is fabulous with the kids, energetic and willing to pitch in. A bit of direction needed occasionally but otherwise worth her weight in gold.

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