is this what I should expect from a babysitter?

[Makipuppy]

I work the odd day away from home and sometimes have to stay overnight, or get back very late.

I found babysitter via a website - she's 20. She came round to meet us and seemed very nice and responsible. The first time she babysat she planned to take DS out in her car - we said no as we live in the centre of town and there's no need. She took him out for 2 hours (DP was at home most of the time and started to get worried). The next time she had him out for four hours. He's nearly four months.

Is this normal? It seems to me she's organising her day around her own needs not DS who would rather stay in, play in his bouncer or gym or whatever and nap in his cot rather than sit in his pushchair for hours.

But then, I do trust her and she has offered to have him the night before when I do overnight trips which would be great.

She charges 8 an hour, which I don't think is particularly cheap. Her references are good.

What do you think?

really sorry for brief hijack but no idea how to contact you otherwise...

will go there now

obv being thick/blind/blonde

cant find it

my name is in the title?

found it on page two - took me a while to reliese was a page 2.3.4 etc

agree very weird she is texting you to say miss's him - esp if only looked after ds twice

if the only reason you are getting her in for night when you are away, is as dh sleeps through noise/alarms then think you need to have words with hubby

Here Blondes

JP yes, I think that texting is weird. I am presuming it is an ad-hoc arrangement, so OP would contact babysitter when required, not the other way around.

OP - don't keep using someone you are not fully happy with. Look for someone else.

I didn't like the texting thing either. She texted me before she was due to sit to remind me to give DS more formula so he would take the bottle with her which I found a bit bossy. She also texted to say DP has said we would need her again soon so what were the dates - he definitely hadn't.

I know she was out for four hours because DP was in most of the time and I'm sure she was shopping because when he phoned to ask her where she was she said she was in the shopping area. Honest at least!

I quite agree DP should wake up but he's worried he won't. Also he has to work with numbers all day so I don't know if it would be a good idea for him to be knackered.

I think 4 hours in the pushchair is too much, although he does like it.

I won't use her again - it's just hard to find someone for odd days. I'll have to rely on swaps with friends.

Thanks everyone.

where are you? maybe one of thre CM/ nannies on here can help?

I'm in central Brighton. Offers welcome!

Make sure you tell her. You don't want her popping round to see if you are okay do you?

"She texted me before she was due to sit to remind me to give DS more formula so he would take the bottle with her which I found a bit bossy."

This would really annoy me TBH! Its bad enough when family interfer, let alone a babysitter that has only been twice!

If there is nobody else you can ask, you might be better off sitting down and telling her all this. TBH she might think that you don't mind her going shopping, as long as baby is happy.

Jenny I know! And when I didn't reply because I felt so annoyed, she phoned me up to ask what was wrong. So irritating.

And I just checked with DP, when she got back she actually told him she'd been shopping.

So, I'm on the hunt for a new daytime nanny/babysitter person...

I think you are right to look for someone else and maybe having a couple of people you can call on would be useful so when one isnt available another is maybe a couple of part time nannies who do ad-hoc days for other families (blondes does this as she only works part time!)

I would look for someone who has a couple of years experience sole charge with babies under 6mths min, with qualifications and a crb and be looking to pay £8-£10 gross an hr.

indeed i do but immore exp than £8

Thanks eastmidlands, I'll try. I don't mind more per hour because it's only occasionally and I'd rather have the peace of mind.

you are about an hour away from me - if you are happy to pay travelling time to and fro, so prob an extra 2hrs pay on top of hours that you need - then feel free to email me if you need someone on a thursday or friday

[email protected]

cant promise i am free, but always worth an ask

though can we wait till snow has gone please as i cant even get out of my road, let alone my town to come to you

thanks blondes, I'll send you an email and you can send me your rates etc.

I also remember you posting about this and not being too happy with long trips out. Personally I wouldn't be keen on staying indoors but would be looking for age appropriate child centred activites not shopping. If you're working then it's not paid personal shopping time with a baby in tow! Plus I try to stay in the first few times with a baby until I get to know them and their routine/needs and I remember that last time she wanted to go out in her car and see ducks and go to the ball pond which was a big trip for a first day with a first time parent. Not saying that you're particularly protective or anxious but I tend to take things slower with first timers so I don't alarm them as someone on their second or third tends to be more relaxed about carting baby around. Anyway at the end of the day you're the boss so in answer to your question, no if that's what you've said you want.

Hope you find someone else soon that you're happy with.

I absolutely agree frakkin, when I have to be away from him on a work trip I'm much happier knowing he's tucked up at home with DP to keep an eye on things. I'm on the hunt for someone else!