Huge list for new nanny - is this normal?

[Rebecca41]

I'm returning to work next week when my maternity leave ends, and I am employing a nanny for the first time. She seems lovely, has spent a couple of days with me and my sons (DS1 is 4 years, DS2 is 8 months), and it's all gone well so far.

Anyway, I thought I'd write out some information for her about my sons' likes and dislikes, routines, meal times etc.

But now I've done it, I realise it's like a novel! It covers several sides of A4 (albeit large widely-spaced writing), and I'm worried that some of the detail makes me sound like a precious and neurotic mother. For example "if DS2 gets upset because he's tired while you're sorting DS1 after their bath, DS2 quite likes to chew a particular plastic bath toy". I've shared this information because little discoveries like this make my life so much easier, and I therefore assume they'll be helpful to a nanny too.

Am I right? Or is she going to take one look at my list and think I'm crazy?

I plan to make it clear to her that this is not a gospel that she must follow. I'm happy for her to find her feet and do things her own way, I just want to make it easier for all concerned if possible.

Am I being OTT?

She'll be working 2 days per week (but one day is 13 hours, the other is 9).

if i were a nanny i would be pleased that you have shared all your ds little quirks, its surely better to know.

I agree.

"is she going to take one look at my list and think I'm crazy?" Yes, probably will but there are things on the list which may prove useful to know.

By making it clear that it isn't a handbook to be followed but more a "guide to the children" then your new nanny will find it usual on occasions when DS2 in particular is being overly fussy without nanny knowing the reason why.

Give it to her before she starts so she has time to read it before starting work.

I don't think you're crazy at all! Just a caring mother who wants the children and nanny to get off to a good start. Point out to her that you want her enjoy looking after your children and have put all the things you can possibly think of down on paper to help her!

As a nanny i love getting handbooks like that, it makes the job so much easier and reassured!

Sounds like useful information that will give her a fast-track to tuning into how to care effectively for your children.

It will benefit them enormously to have a new carer with a better understanding of what makes them tick. Afterall you are both working towards their best welfare.

I'd be fine with that. I did, however, work for one Mum who was a little neurotic challenging who would leave me 3 sides of A4 notes every morning which once included a diagram of what size to cut the babies green beans. I was 30 at the time.

Depends on type of person and how they download info; my nannies have been better to have had a couple of things mentioned each time we catch up and gradually pick it up.

Good luck.

Might think your crazy (in the nicest possible way )

but tbh, knowing those little quircks that make life so much easier is Way better then finding them out yourself...the hard way!

If someone else was looking after the 3 i look after (not parents) then there's things i would tell them that seem silly or odd but would be a nightmare without it! e.g. youngest charge will not go to bed unless shes sleepy, try cradling her in your arms if she snuggles up...time for bed...if not...playtime!...

makes a world of differance!

Absolutely love the thought of a diagram of how to cut green beans! inspired!

Absolutely nothing wrong with giving it to your new nanny with a hint that she might like to read it. Whether she does or not is up to her. It's always useful to know childrens little quirks. I always read this sort of thing whether I think the parents are crazy or not because at the end of the day I might have endless qualifications in child development but I don't know or assume to know everything. Parents and nannies should be reading off the same page in an ideal world.

I would welcome a big list.

Better than calling you at work to ask you where is the comfort teddy.

Also, don't forget nannies like a quick handover in the evening. There is nothing worst than finishing a 10-12 hours day, having an appoitment etc and standing there for half hour talking about the favourite toy/song. It saves time for both of you.

I'm sure if you put it to her this way she will not think you are crazy

I like getting information about the DCs quirks and foibles! It means when I start a job I know the little habits that help calm a child down, or signal certain events are about to happen, or just let that child know I know what makes them feel secure IYSWIM? If I got a list of their day, minute to minute, I might be a bit but it definitely helps to have a bit of info on their characters and personalities, likes and dislikes, that kind of thing. It can really help ease the transition if the nanny knows beforehand a bit about what makes the child(ren) tick.

Its a handbook for 2 kids so of course it will be long! Mine for DS1 when he was 6 months old was around 4 pages (routine, likes, dislikes, medicines, emergency numbers etc) and did a similar length one for DS2 when I went back to work and left him with our lovely nanny. I agree - give it to her before she starts so she can ask any questions if need be.

am i the only nanny who has never had a handbook?

some may think you are nutty others may think its useful info

nanny can read and then up to her what you do with it

ebb - what size should they be cut?

Nope - never had a handbook either

But agree that they would be useful.

Important to mention that it's just a guide and that you are happy for her to find her own feet - as you mentioned. Otherwise she may think you are nutty and head for the hills

Blondes About 1.5cm in length if I remember correctly. Was about 5/6 yrs ago. That was the only job I've had with 'directions' so to speak. Ie. Make sure nappies are placed front down in the storage basket as I don't like the pattern on them. Bless! She was lovely just er.....particular. I stayed nearly two yrs until visa ran out but she went through alot a few nannies who couldn't cope with her little ways.

couldnt have been THAT bad if you stayed 2 years