Can you please help with a plan ? I need some help with my mindee who is not settled after 8 months.

[Summerfruit]

Hi ! A bit of background. I have this little girl who is 14 months and she has been with me since may. I have her 2 days a week. Every morning she seems very happy to come with me then the trouble start. I put her on the floor and she starts crying. Then I try to get ready and the girls for school and she cant bear if I touch my dd (2), she hits her and even bite her once. From 9 to 12, she is ok as she has all my attention and we go out etc, we play one on one etc..

Then from 12, it all start again as I have dd back. It looks like she really cant bear me looking after my dd. When I have my dd in my arms, she comes running screaming and try to push my dd out of my lap.

I need to come up with a plan and submit to the parents (they aware of the situation). Can you please give me some tips ?

That's not really not settling though is it, so don't label it as that as it's almost making excuses for her behaviour.

What have parents said? What is she like at home?

What have you already tried?

Do you think I'm making excuses for her ? But she is only 14 months old, still a baby no ?

She is an only child, the parents dont have this behaviour at home apart maybe the bitting but it has been sorted.

When she cries, sometimes I try to ignore her and then when she doesnt cry I praise her a lot. Her routine in my house is the same at her house, I have respected to the minute.

Before her, I had a little boy who took about 4 months to settle in and now he is having a fab time and he is very much part of our team ! That is what I want for this little girl.

I'm really concerned about her and she is always in my tought even if I dont look after her. I dont want to give up but it is really getting hard.

Will she play with your DD at all, if you sit on the floor and play something with both of them together? It can be very simple at their age - she has your attention in the morning, then your DD comes home and takes her attention away. She will be used to 1:1 attention at home, being an only child and needs to learn to share toys and adults. Only you can see if this will work.

8 months is quite a long time and is definitely beyond the normal 'settling in' period.

We do a lot "lets play all together" but while we are doing it, she grab me by the clothes to get my attention. What I was thinking doing is to take my dd from the playgroup for a week so she can be with us in the morning and take it from there. What do you think ?