Help! My nanny is pregnant ...

[WineFlu]

Love, love, love my nanny but she's pregnant and as a result not only is the support suffering a little due to all day morning sickness (poor thing) but lots of appointments and last minute days off and it's very early days. I work full time but job will be under threat if I keep taking so much time off with no notice to cover - what do I do???

Totally feel for you but tread carefully. Can she plan her antenatals etc. to give you a but more notice? Do you have any local support, grandparents etc. that could help? Does she know how long she wants to work for?

God I feel for you! Sorry nothing constructive to add but however lovely a nanny is (and I genuinely loved both of ours) it is a complete PITA (not pregnancy-the letting down) I wish you loads of luck and wished I had a solution....

does your nanny have any nanny friends who also know your children who could cover?

More of my nanny friends work 4 days a week (or less) than actually work 5 days a week, and therefor i personally know a nanny (who also knows my charges / their house / routine etc) who is having a day off every day of the week.

If the same is true for your nanny, one of her nanny friends might be able to cover at shor notice?

Can she take your DC to appointments with her?

Also second nannyl's idea for cover if she does have a good nanny circle. Otherwise the number of a good temp agency will be necessary if you don't want to keep taking time off!

Why is she having last minute days off?

If she's too sick to work then there's not much she can do about it. And as she has a legal right to paid time off for antenatal appointments then she may not want to take the children with her - I know I wouldn't.

Why are there last minute days off though? Is that just for sickness?

im the same as nannyl - know lots of nannies who could cover me if i were off work

snd yes she has a legal right to time off

if she is early stages then she shouldnt be having that many appointments and they are usually arranged a few weeks ahead of time - well mine have been

I know she is entitled to all the appointments and sick leave and don't begrudge that a bit - just becoming hard for me to cope with dropping my office in it too!
I'll check out her nanny circle but I think she only has a couple of friends, one of whom is leaving the country shortly! thanks for the tips.
The last minute sickness seems to be related to all day morning sickness but I tend to get advised really late on a Sunday night and then again each evening if it continues!!!
Family not close which doesn't help, I know, oh for the old days!

Oh love.
I know that you must be pleased for her but it is hard when you are a one woman 'business' and bear the brunt of maternity leave. I nearly lost my job because the nurse I hired went off sick alot with morning sickness which means I had to keep cancelling my job as not allowed to work without cover. It was a nightmare.

Can the children's father not cover any of the sick leave?

I wouldn't take the DCs to appointments with nanny. What if (heaven forbid) nanny got bad news at a scan or something? Appointments are relatively easy to cover because they are at least known in advance.

My last nanny had a very troublesome pregnancy. I still owe friends and neighbours some babysitting as a result! If your nanny doesn't have mates who can cover for her, do you have SAHM friends, or part timers who could do you a favour?

do you have any sahm who are friends who can help you out?

Shit Missus 84 - that is an amazingly good point!!!!

Have you a DP who can also have a bit of time off work?

When I said appointments I meant blood tests or seeing a doctor about the chronic sickeness. If it's early stages she shouldn't have that many appointments?

I wouldn't take charges to a scan, but have done to other appointments, not pregnancy related though!

Ermmm...Every pregnancy is different. Some posters seem to be saying that "if it's early stages she shouldn't have that many appointments" simply because they didn't, and that's pretty unreasonable.

I had loads of appointments with all of my pregnancies in the first trimester. For all manner of things. And I went to every damn one because it was my baby and more important than my job. Lucky you if you didn't have to do that and just toddled up to the hospital for a scan at 12 weeks, but please disabuse yourself of the notion that that is how it is for everyone.

OP you have my sympathy, it's very very difficult for you I can see that. But I'm not sure there's anything you can do in terms of the nanny's attendance (other suggestions about back up, other nannies etc seem very good though). And that is the crappy side to having a nanny, because if she can't make it in to work then you're in the poo. Unfortunate, but there it is.

If she's sick she's sick - it's hardly ideal having someone completely incapaciated with morning sickness looking after your child anyway. It's not like she'll be up for super energetic races round the park and museums etc if she's clutching the toilet wishing she were dead. (My own toddler is watching far too much CBeebies at the moment simply because all I'm good for is lying on the sofa and moaning).

Good luck with getting alternative arrangements sorted and I hope she feels better soon (for both your sakes).