what do you think? 4yr old expelled from school

[dmo]

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1230238/Boy-expelled-school-aged-School-says-attacked-teache rs.html

the link again so it will open in a new tab

That is very sad and its very sad that the parents refuse to accept that their child has problems. However it does seem very extreme to exclude a child who is so young.

However my son was almost kicked out of pre school at two years and 8 months. It was only the intervention of the community paediatrian that stopped my son from being excluded from a private pre school.

It took several months to find the root of the problem. In the end we discovered that my son was deaf and once that was corrected my son's behaviour problems cleared up overnight.

Often very simple things like glue ear can cause massive problems.

rs.html or even

Nope my link doesn't work either - oh dear

The mother maintains that her DS is just normally boisterous, as many 4 year olds are. Does she really think that the school aren't aware of what "normal" boisterous-ness (?) is?

ooopppssss

try this?

thanks guys i am rubbish at links

The school would be willing to work with him, it say so in the article, however it has to be in partnership with the mother. If she won't cooperate, and even worse, admit that he has problems then there is nothing they can do. It is sad for the particular DC, but the school have to put the needs of the majority first. It is very upsetting for other DCs to have a DC who won't listen or follow simple instructions. ' Please leave the light switches alone' should be enough for any 4 yr old-it should certainly be enough if they say 'Please leave the light switches alone because......'
I wonder how old he will be before she works out that it is more than boisterous, high spirits? My guess is when she can't do anything with him, the neighbours all complain and he is in trouble with the police.
It is so sad, especially as I expect that she thinks that she is a good mother and working in her DS's interests.

As usual only half the story in the paper, I would like to know how he was at playgroup as he has probably started school with some of the same children, there is no way the school will have taken this decision lightly, they have vast experience of all typse of behaviour.

Anyone else hate those t.shirts that he's wearing!!! its almost as though the parents think his behaviour is funny.

if His parents have refused to agree to a special action plan to deal with his behaviour then there is nothing else the school can do

wonder if will be kicked out of next school

Peversely, they may have done him a favour. I work with children with behavioural difficulties, and all too often, they are 'contained' in mainstream education which does not meet their needs, learning very little.

'Inclusion' is more than being in the same room.

IME, the local authority does nothing to find (and pay for) a suitable placement in an EBD setting for example, until the child is permanently excluded from a mainstream school/s.

Sad but true.

I wonder if the exclusion has more to do with the parents refusing to accept that their son has some behavioural problems (whatever the cause) and refusing to work with the school to improve his behaviour.
I have children with SEN and remember very clearly the SENCo telling me that in her experience, the most difficult situations are caused by parents refusing help for their children.
This child may well have particular problems affecting his behaviour, however if the parents can't see that, there is very little that the school can do. The school must also take into account the impact this child's behaviour has on the other children in the class and the teaching staff.

but how many behavoural difficulties are down to a diagnosed cause or just stupid lazy parents who cant control, or wont control their kids and blame everyone else for the behaviour.

If my 4 year old wouldnt stop touching the light switch when told to do so I am afraid he would have only done it once.

stupid parents, and yes hate the t shirt, kids like these learn no control or submit to authority and she may be trying to blame the police/council/school when he is an antisocial little git as a teen.

lets hope liberal governors dont force the poor teachers to have him back..

"but how many behavoural difficulties are down to a diagnosed cause or just stupid lazy parents who cant control, or wont control their kids and blame everyone else for the behaviour."

I'm not sure it matters tbh... the behaviour presents in the classroom; as a teacher, there's not a lot you an do wrt to parenting- you put strategies in place at school to change the behaviour. Getting angry with parents tends to be counter productive.

Some children have SEN/EBD and poor parenting.

What wonderful comments left by the readers of this newspaper. 'Nothing that a good hiding wouldnt sort out' so good he posted it twice.

just wanted your thoughts this little boy actually came to me for a little while for breakfast club

My thoughts are that the parents are probably the problem. I don't know how it came to be in a national newspaper unless they cooperated. I wouldn't splash my DCs face all over the country.

The t shirt has a skull and cross bones on it, not a slogan stating "I'm a little twat whose parents want to kick your fuckin head in"

If you are on a limited budget in a small town it is extremely difficult to get t shirts WISHOUT some sort of slogan on them.

As for excluding a four year old - well, you send babies to school, don't be surprised when they behave like babies.

Not all four year olds do as they are told. My ds1 couldn't have done it on pain of death. He couldn't do is on pain of severe punishment, as I found out when he was four. it is NOT necessarily the parents fault.

The light switch thing sounds exactly like ds1. He used to stand and fuck about with light switches too.

'If you are on a limited budget in a small town' sorry since when has it been acceptable to judge that 'poor' children behave any less well than better off kids. Poor parenting is poor parenting.

The parents would have had to give permission to print the boys name and story as he is so young.

thats the sort of parents they are..

on the issue of boys, my 2 were naughty and mischevious but if they had repeatedly ignored a direct order from a teacher I would have been ashamed of them and me.. thats the difference I guess.. these parents seem proud of his naughtiness.. what a shame for the child..

dmo - what was he like at breakfast club?

Very strongly suspect parents are the main problem here: how many of us would be happy to see our offspring in the papers in this kind of context? It does seem as if they think any attention is good news.

It may well be that the poor little mite has SN, on top of having these parents, but he's not going to get any help, is he? Just keeping him in the school might not have been much help to him either if the parents won't consent to him being investigated.

My nephew had 3 years of junior school disrupted by no less than three children, almost certainly with SN, whose parents did not cooperate so no investigations could be done. It ended with the teacher having a breakdown (and btw this was in Sweden, so no reflection on UK school system).

thebody Wed 25-Nov-09 08:36:35
'If you are on a limited budget in a small town' sorry since when has it been acceptable to judge that 'poor' children behave any less well than better off kids. Poor parenting is poor parenting.'

Colditz' remark was made in the context of the T-shirt, not in the context of the parenting. No reason at all poor parents should settle for worse behaviour, but they may well have to settle for less tasteful T-shirts. (ds also owns T-shirt with skull and crossbones, but all teachers remark on how well behaved and polite he is; there just happen to be a lot of these T-shorts around in the 2ndhand shops)

thebody, do you have English as a second language?

My comment about the small budget in a small town was directed at the snotty comments about the child's T SHIRT.

wow colditz!! am I to take that as a racial remark/slur... lol.. dont get your knickers in a twist.

and on the low budget shite.. I shop at primark and grew up in Handsworth in Bham.. lots of non didactic T shirts there if you look.. btw that means no motto on it...

just thought you might be confused with my poor Englidsh/English....

Enough of the T shirt issue anyway.. just seriously how sad that parents cant control a 4 year old and feel that thats ok. trust me I have boys of 20,18 and 16 so do know what I am talking about.. if you cant control them at 4 than they will control you at teen level...