Help! Our nanny has given notice & her last day of work is...today!

[Maria2007loveshersleep]

I have already posted a thread here a few days ago about our situation & some of you have given me great advice.

I'm posting a new thread because our situation has changed & I'm very stressed! Our nanny, as I said in the previous thread, told us yesterday that there was a possibility of another job in her previous field (journalism) which meant she might have to resign. She is only able to legally work 20 hrs per week (which is what her new job would be) but offered to stay with us & get paid cash in hand until we find someone new. I don't really want that because I don't want to do anything illegal, but I'm sure she'll come by & visit our DS since they have an excellent relationship.

The problem is, today she did the interview, was offered the other job & is starting...(get this) tomorrow! This means that, for one thing, all appointments etc I have for tomorrow I've now had to cancel. She has given us no notice & I haven't shown my unhappiness to her at all because I care for her, we have an excellent relationship & she loves our boy (and he her). But I feel very hurt & tbh a bit angry mainly because I'm at the last stages of finishing my PhD- submitting in january- (which she knows) & am under a huge amount of pressure, so will have to lose loads of time now to find new childcare asap.

Anyway, rant over. As I said, the main thing for me is to remain on friendly terms.

In any case, I'm now on a mad hunt for a part-time nanny for 27 hrs a week. After all the info / advice you've all given we've decided to offer 9£ per hour net & then to look for a nannyshare after we find our nanny. I feel that with 9£ per hour is a fair price for this area of London.

Any advice on what's the best way to find someone quickly? Any good agencies in North London that you recommend?

And there is another nanny out there who is better for you, will love your child and will not treat you like an inconvenience.

Maria, I think you are taking the right attitude towards this... not much you can do to insist that she stays.

Why the 20 hour limit? Student visa? If so, I wouldn't suggest taking them back on a CIH basis... especially as they have already been in the country for 12 months, so their visa may have expired - not your issue any longer if you will no longer employ them. Leave their new employer to sort that one out with immigration.

Good luck with your search for a new nanny. You may find that you like the new nanny even more than than you did like the old one.

Yes she's on a student visa. It's still current (no problems with immigration).

I came down to talk to her in the afternoon & she was kind of blushing & embarrased & told me she really doesn't want to let us down, & that she wouldn't just get up & leave just like that, and that she would really be relieved if I understood her position. I told her that I know her well which is why I understand.

It's all sounding very magnaminous & adult, now that I think of it! Believe me I don't feel that way

aww maria - i am SO sorry this has happened to you

what she has done is very unprofessional

you may value her friendship but obviously she doesnt feel the same or she would have given you notice

def dont rush into hiring a nanny - much better to get a temp in and find the right person

have a look on netmums

there is a nanny i know looking for work, but miles away - maybe you could both help each other out and temp for each other for a few weeks?

though she would have to live in for those 3 days - let me know and i can give you her email address

[email protected]

Thanks Blondes... that's all very thoughtful of you!

Today I'm feeling even worse. Its becoming clear that things are hard, its not going to be easy to find the right nanny. 90% of the responses I'm getting so far are crap, and tbh I'm not even getting any good responses!

Also, the CIH thing with our nanny is not going to work. She came today for 2-3 hrs & it was clear to me (not sure if it was to her) that she's already 'gone' ifkwIm. For example, she was reading through stuff about her new job (instruction manuals etc) plus texting the whole time she was here. PLUS (and this is the worst bit) she told me:

'Well as you know my boyfriend is coming tomorrow, so we've planned to go (somewhere) after work from thursday until sunday. But if you need me for tomorrow or friday or saturday let me know!'

As if I would tell her 'no, don't go on your planned trip with your bf & stay to work with us'.

So no childcare until Monday but even then I don't think I want her back.

There is some good news though. A friend of mine from back home who does nannying at home & is between jobs has offered to come & stay with us for 3 weeks, do some nannying as I interview people & do my PhD work. It's great if it works out, because it means we can then be relaxed about the recruitment process & also I can get to do some work. She even said she can do the same in january if needed. Its all in exchange for the plane ticket & some money which all in all comes much cheaper than what we pay now for our current nanny. Plus she's a friend & its great if she comes anyway.

Think I've found your advert on Gumtree. Assuming I have right advert (your DS is 15 months, you aren't a native english speaker) it looks reasonable in terms of saying what you are wanting. Is the problem therefore that you are getting people contacting you, who don't meet that specification?
Would tightening the person specification help to get more suitable applicants?
Would including salary level help to avoid people expecting more money than you can afford to pay from applying?

Sounds to me as though you may be getting quite a lot of people enquiring... which is great... but it means you need to weed out those who are unsuitable. Would a pre-interview questionnaire be useful? (AtheneNoctua's Nanny Interview Questionnaire (Adapt it to suit your particular job, then send a selection of the questions to applicants to answer, then select candidates to interview based on their responses.)

great your friend can help out

hers hoping you find a good/right nanny soon

Thanks Nick & Blondes. It is a great relief, yes, if my friend manages to come (we're still talking about it, will be confirmed soon).

Nick, I'm getting some ok responses, but most are really bad. The really bad ones I just delete immediately . I think it's a matter of time, really.

I have kind of decided I would prefer not to go down the agency route. The cost is horrendous!! I hadn't realized immediately just how high the cost is, but now that I've understood this I'm shocked. However, if we were to find a family for a nannyshare (I'm frantically looking!) we'd probably be able to cover the agency costs together (maybe).