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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

How on earth do i find an au pair?

23 replies

clareygill · 09/11/2009 20:10

I live in the sticks & have recently gone back to work 13 months after the birth of DS2 - part time (work that is, not the birth, or DS2). DS1 is at school in year R. Childcare arrangements are bearable but long days for both kids, lots of running around for me & obviously £££££. Am thinking of looking into getting an au pair but noone i know has one, has ever had one or has ever thought of having one. Can anyone help? please!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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iheartdusty · 09/11/2009 20:16

browse a website or two, to get some ideas.

I have used aupair world a few times, or look at gumtree.com

and of course browse back through MN on this topic for tips!

iheartdusty · 09/11/2009 20:18

should have said, if you feel a bit unconfident, plenty of agencies will sort out an au pair for you - you pay extra, but for the first time this might be a good way forward.

Keep a look out for a poster called Millarkie, she lives somewhere rural-ish and has lots of AP experience...

Original poster

clareygill · 09/11/2009 20:26

cool, thanks. We don't live up a mountain or anything that rural, but definitely no bright city lights anywhere near!

OP posts:

mumof2222222222222222boys · 09/11/2009 20:26

Do check out the old threads on APs on here - quite a few want similar advice to you.

You do say you live in the sticks. Will you be able to provide a car / is there public transport / young people for AP to meet / socialize with / a college for her / him to attend language lessons???

The other side of it is relatively simple (AP world or an agency). We used an agency the first time, and have used same agency for all our 4 APs.

Good luck!

iheartdusty · 09/11/2009 20:37

One further thought - 13 months is pretty young - you would need to look carefully to find someone with the right kind of experience of taking care of such a young child on their own.

could your budget stretch to a nanny, maybe recently qualified?

Original poster

clareygill · 09/11/2009 20:41

yes, I've had a quick look at old posts on MN & now I'm worried that 13 months is too young. Have no idea how much a nanny would cost...? I guess i could think about a part time nanny? If such a thing exists?

OP posts:

nbee84 · 09/11/2009 21:58

Part time nannies definitely exist - there are quite a few of us on here that do a 3 or 4 day week.

Rates vary widely across the uk anything from £7 gross per hour to up to £15 gross per hour for an experienced London nanny. You also have to factor in the extra costs - employers ni, increased heating and food bills at home, activities kitty, petrol costs etc.

nbee84 · 09/11/2009 22:00

Nannynick - can I have a brownie point for stating gross salary per hour

Millarkie · 09/11/2009 22:23

I'm rural (well, I'm in a village) and have an au pair but my kids are school age. I agree that you would be lucky to find an au pair who would be able to cope with a 13 month old (but it is possible, my first au pair had 18 months experience as a nursery nurse). You might be able to use an au pair to take the children to day nursery/school and pick them up so they are at home snug when you get back?
Otherwise a nanny - which might be about the same cost as au pair plus nursery but would probably give you longer term cover (au pairs tend to stay for 6-9 months, hard to get longer unless you accept someone with little/no English which doesn't work for very young children!)
I recruit au pairs from aupair-world.net and pay over the odds to get someone who speaks English well, drives (so they can escape the village, no need to drive for the job), and is prepared for village life rather than the bright lights - there are not vast numbers of au pairs who fit my criteria but we've been ok so far.

Original poster

clareygill · 10/11/2009 21:31

great - thanks. Am thinking about part time nanny now. Was told by school today (well my mum was!) that DS1 isn't coping well with such long days - he's 'away with the fairies'! More stress! I wish I was away with the fairies! Makes me wonder why I'm worrying about who can look after my children while I go out to work to pay for someone to look after my children. why don't i just do it? We'd all be much happier...that's another thread, isn't it?

OP posts:

dreamteamgirl · 10/11/2009 22:40

Hi clarey

I have an AP, and we are not bright city lights. She does get a bit stir crazy but she does ok.

I think you are right to be looking towards nanny - AP can only really do 25 hours (or 35 for an Au Pair plus) which doesnt sound as if it would be enough

booboo78 · 10/11/2009 23:29

Hi Clareygill

We have had au pairs for the past few years and it's worked out well for us over all, we're not rural (live in fairly big city) but I do have some contacts if you want them.

It is possible to find an au pair with suitable skills, knowledge and experience to care for a baby, my last au pair is a qualified paediatric nurse and my current au pair an assistant manager in a nursery.

moseskoeln · 12/11/2009 16:19

hi
I was an au-pair/ am for the next month.
when i began baby was 11 months, tbh i dont think either side had problems with the age.

a recent conversation with parents was saying how glad they were they chose an au pair like me for her at that age. how much i have taught her which they never would have thought to and how great its been that the child sees me as a part of the family.

I found my family though au-pair world, and this does appear to be the first point of call for most au-pairs i know.

I would class myself as experienced though, having worked with children in many situations and places the last 4 years. i would maybe do what others have said and just enquire a bit more about experience.

on a positive note my time as an au-pair has been very rewarding. i probabbly work 40+ hours a week sole charge, but wouldn't change my time here for anything. I am looking into qualifications and becoming a live in nanny on my return to england..

please remember an au-pair should also be part of the family like i have had, NOT just cheap childcare you couldn't care less about

Original poster

clareygill · 13/11/2009 10:36

thanks for all these positive hints & tips. It's a whole new world out there. Still haven't got my head round the whole idea. I showed my husband aupair world & he's suddenly very keen! Can't imagine why...
booboo if you have any contacts that you think may be useful I'd be grateful. We live on the south coast.

OP posts:

catepilarr · 13/11/2009 10:49

moses, are you in germany? but even then, why are you called aupair?

booboo78 · 13/11/2009 23:29

Clareygill

When do you need an au pair to start?

booboo78 · 13/11/2009 23:30

And how many hours do you need the au pair to work?

Original poster

clareygill · 14/11/2009 20:29

booboo i think the start of the winter term (ie beginning of Jan 10) would be ideal although this maybe short notice? I would want someone to work 2 1/2 days a week, 8am - 6pm 'ish then maybe 1 evening a week babysitting. Is that reasonable?

OP posts:

cazH · 15/11/2009 18:13

I would really suggest an agency for your first, then they have lots of references, doctors references, school references etc. Phone the overseas people though because we have been given one which were translated by the agency and were not accurate to what the person had actually said about the person. If you get one who is already in the UK talk to the parents but make sure they really are the parents and not just a friend

Sallymum85 · 16/11/2009 10:47

Hi Clareygill

We've had lots of au pairs and found them ourselves. We use nannygps.com now as unlike au pair world they do not display any contact information for my family to all who pay the fee (I was never comfortable about having so much personal contact and family routine info available on the Internet). Our last au pair was a qualified primary school teacher from Spain so the kids got to learn some Spanish as well.

I would advise that you reference check all candidates before offering a job.

Good luck. It's a great flexible childcare option and can work out really well for the family when you get the right person.

Sally

Sallymum85 · 16/11/2009 10:55

Forgot to say we got our first au pair when our youngest was 10 months old. She was a gorgeous person who genuinely loved being with kids and she loved the girls. The au pair was 26 at the time and had lots of experience with children. We still keep in touch with her and she now has a little girl herself.

It worked out well for us as our 10 month old could keep her routine and was at home rather than in a creche. She could drive and take our older child to tennis and other activities not possible if she was in school aftercare.

A good website is www.nannygps.com and I noticed last time I was looking there were also part-time nannies looking for work too.

booboo78 · 16/11/2009 14:29

Clareygill I think what your looking for is achievable, although if you want someone to start in Jan 2010 you will have to really start looking now as it can be time consuming with interviews, reference checks etc.

There are lots of different ways to find an au pair so it really just depends on which is the best method to suit you.

I prefer to find my own, when I used agency before I didn't have a good experience and yet there are other families who swear by them.

One piece of advice though is if you have applicants who are already in the country with a host family but wish to find a new family due to being unhappy/unsatisfied with current family then make sure you get both sides of the story from AP and host family. Could save you a lot of trouble in the long run.

dikkertjedap · 16/11/2009 15:00

Most agencies will not allow au pair to have sole care of 13 month old though ... would however be fine if there is an adult present in case of emergencies (e.g. if you are able to work from home). We had a similar problem when our DD was 1 year and I had to go back to work. Good luck.

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