If you were my childminder and I asked you...

[FoolishMum]

If you knew how my DD got a bruise would you think I was terrible?

She has an unexplained bruise so I asked my childminder if she had had an accident (thinking she might have forgotten to mention it). Childminder was unaware of how it happended.

I trust her, it's not a bad bruise so I am happy to think that however it happened it was not sufficient enough for either of us to notice.

But now I am feeling really guilty, should I not have asked? Am I allowed to be a bit neurotic.

Oh I wouldn't feel guilty it is just natural mum worrying

The thing is mine often get unexplained bruises now and again.DD had one on her bottom the other day,and she has a nappy on.God knows how it happened

You are allowed to be neurotic

Honest

As a childminder I watch the children lots but I miss things - es if the child doesn't 'react' & I never get offended at questions like that

oh thank you, I've been fretting about it!

I was worried I soured the relationship.

I wouldn't ask it every day tho'

Any concerns you have, always ask... but don't expect the childminder to know the answer, as young children can often injure themselves and not create a fuss, just pick themselves up again and carry on. I am guessing that your DD is not old enough to ask how she got hurt, thus is likely to be an under 5.

I'm a cm and had a parent ask me if I knew how a bruise was caused, I didn't and was quite happy to be asked but then I did wonder if the child had had a bump and I hadn't noticed, then I felt a bit guilty. But I was totally fine with being asked and would be happy to be asked again.

If my child was at a childminder's and the CM minded me asking, then she wouldn't be the right childminder for me. That said, if another child caused the bruise or if she sat on something for example, then yes it may have happened there but she wouldn't necessarily know about it.

I have to fill in an 'existing injury form' if needed when I drop DD off at nursery, even just for bruises.

Sometimes, in the box where it asks for details of how the injury happened, I have to say that I don't know. Sometimes you just don't. I'm fine with that, and I'm sure that your CM is as well.

You were asking, not accusing, so don't lose any sleep over it