caught my CM fibbing - what to do?

[angelaspangela]

my CM texted on a thurs afternoon to say she couldn't take my daughter the next day for "family reasons".

When i saw her next she said it was "a crisis" she was "so stressed out and just had to sort it out"

i then bumped in to mum of other child there and CM had booked these 2 days off months ago to renew wedding vows

she has outstanding ofsted rating and daughter is happy there

but i feel she has abused trust by lying to my face like that. she obv just forgot to tell me but truth would've been better

should i raise it? how? what if she gets stroppy and takes it out on daughter/cancels contract?

I would hate that and if I felt she would take it out on my child I wouldn't be leaving her there anyway, regardless of if I said anything.

She was a bit silly to fib about something like that. I don't think that many people would have a problem with her taking a day off for that reason.

Has she often cancelled days?

If your DD is happy there, I would let it go.

Have you never done anything like this? She obviously forgot to tell you and panicked. Or the other mother is the one not telling the truth.

And why are you leaving your child with someone that you might even consider capable of "getting stroppy and taking it out on your daughter"??????

Ooh, I would definitely let her know that you know. And perhaps offer your congratulations on the renewal of her wedding vows

I think that's about as far as I would take it though. If your DD is happy there and you are in general happy with the CM there is little point in doing very much more. I guess she forgot to tell you and by saying words such as "family", "stressed out", etc., she wasn't being totally dishonest as I am sure she was stressed about it (esp on realising that she'd forgotten to tell you) and it was indeed a family thing!

I'd probably let her know I knew with some flippant comment such as, 'got you a wedding present but thought wedding was called off as you said you were having a crisis...'

I don't think she was fibbing to you. It is a familly thing and it can be stressful. Don't jump to conclusions, are there some other things that you're not happy about?

She should have just given you the real reason, because it wasn't really trivial, like having her legs waxed that could be rearranged. This couldn't be rearranged.

It sounds like you don't have a great relationship with her??

But she told the op as if it was an emergency or unexpected which renewing wedding vows are neither.

She can cancel contract but i really dont think that she 'would take it out on your dd. I have never met a cm or nanny doing this.

I think Rindercella is right - she cocked up by forgetting to tell me, panicked, lied to get out of it and then had to keep going ("so stressed out, it took me til midnight to sort out" etc etc)

i think rship is OK - daughter happy there and that is the main thing but there are issues eg sore bum a lot of the time which we've never had before

i've only been there for 2 months and it's my first child

i just wish she had fessed up to forgetting as now i wonder if she would lie to me about other things if she had too ....

Sort out the sore bum first before anything else.