What would you do about this nanny/TV ishoo?

[rupertsabear]

OK, we have a nanny housekeeper. At the mo, dcs (7, 4, 3) are in summer activity centre/nursery respectively. She picks them up and they're all home at 5-ish, then have tea around 6 or 6.30. I get home between 6 and 7 usually. I have repeatedly said "no TV" in the week. DS1 has revealed that they actually always spend this 1 1/2 hours watching Power Rangers, Pokemon, and a load of horrible ads for junk food and plastic rubbish.

Now, my problem is that the carer in question is a nice person, but just useless with small children, with exactly zero imagination for games and no techniques for coping with tantrums and rows. When I confront her with this, she just says "but they were fighting" and looks dumbfounded when I ask whether she had thought of initiating a game, doing a puzzle, starting a painting session.

But, I don't think power rangers is suitable for 3 and 4 year olds as too violent. And I don't want them watching the adverts.

But, they seem to have found their happy medium in this way, and we are only talking until mid-August, when we will have other childcare arrangements. I don't have time or inclination to engage in extensive training for the nanny/housekeeper, as we are moving house, I'm busy at work, and she's leaving anyway, and it's just not a complete train wreck (though this is one of a series of problems, which is why she's leaving when we move). But I am a bit cross.

So what would you do? The options are:

1. Let it go. After all it's hardly child abuse and everyone's happy.

1. Say no TV, and babysitter has to be responsible for making sure they have something to do apart from fighting.

1. Say they can watch TV, but only a DVD from the kids selection (extensive) that we have at home. The problem with this is that they always argue about what to watch.

If professional, qualified nannies are a british eccentricity then surely they're a positive eccentricity?! I've seen many appalling nannies (particularly live-in)- really absolutely incompetent in even basic things- looking after children in the country where I originally come from. The only positive about those nannies is of course that they're dead cheap. They do it simply to make money (and have no particular interest in childcare or child development) & the parents hire them so that they don't have to pay much. I'm not saying that there are no unqualified nannies who're good- obviously there are, and some of them end up caring deeply for the children & looking after them brilliantly, simply out of having good instinct & a good heart. But surely it's better- when it comes to your own children!!- to hire someone who has experience & knows what they're doing & has an active interest in child development?

BTW I say this as someone who has a non-experienced, relatively young part-time nanny, no qualifications to speak of, but a wondrful kind heart, lots of common sense & a good instinct (found her through a personal recommendation, she was a friend of a friend). Still, even though she's fabulous, if I were to do it again I would go for a professional, qualified nanny.

I think proper nannies are great! I would probably get a proper nanny if my children were at home all day too, though I have for the most part had very good experiences with completely unqualified people looking after them. I have heard about British nannies being in high demand, but have never actually met one anywhere at all apart from in Britain, so they're not all over the place. It would definitely be very unusual in Italy, and in the Middle East I've never met a nanny who wasn't filipino or indian.

But, great as nannies might be, I don't need to import one specially to work for me for an hour between nursery and the time I get home

REALLY?

Golly, I interviewed for at least 3 positions in Italy last time I was looking, and that was just out of the job specs I was sent that I liked, and agencies kept trying to steer me towards to the Middle East although I have to say I wasn't interested. If you just flick through the vacancies on Nannyjob there are tons wanting qualified, experienced British nannies all over the place.

I would unplug the tv and put it in the cupboard till she finishes working for you in August. If you, the mother and employer say "no tv", then no tv it is.

If, as you say, she has no idea whatsoever how to occupy dc, I would put a few things out every morning forthem to play with when they get back from their summer activity set-up. One day paper, paint, crayons and a trainset. Another day building blocks, play dough and so on. Don't you have story CD's they could have on in the background whilst they potter about?

I find 90 minutes TV a day WAY too much btw.

Do they have a playroom as such? If so, I think 3 dc can occupy themselves for an hour or so with their things without too much adult intervention and guidance - and with another half hour for a glass of milk and a snack and clean up, I should think the 90 minutes go past without too much trouble.