Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

Time to say goddbye?

37 replies

OFSTEDoutstanding · 19/05/2009 09:58

Hi am feeling really today. Have just had 2 weeks off work as I am currently only minding one mindee and he went on holiday. I have posted about him before and the problems I have with his parents and him sometimes. He came back yesterday and cried solidly from 7.30-1 when I dropped him at nursery. There was no reason for the crying and I tried to ask what was wrong and he wouldn't tell me. He cried whenever it was a meal time and this started off my dd (aged 8 months) he is almost 3. Am wondering if it is for attention. I know its not because he has just had 2 weeks off as was doing this before he went too. My problem is I do this job not only because I enjoy it but because I am able to look after my own children this way (sorry to say but after 16 years in childcare I would prefere to do it myself I have met some real rotters over the years!) My ds (3 1/2) has now asked if he can go to pre-school every day so he doesn't have to see x and also if he can not go to toddlers so he can go to 'school' with his friends and not with x. I am really because I am feeling that I want to be with my dc who don't want to be here because of x. What would you do he is my only mindee and I need the money? I tried to talk to mum this morning but she couldn't get away quick enough and he was already crying. I have a new mindee in Sept and another one has asked for a Sept start which I have said I will get back to her about as x is due to go to pre-school but mum forgot to ask for a place as now he is on waiting list. Mum has told me once he gets a place he will be using his 5 sessions and I will be dropping down. This other possible mindee would be 2 days week and the definite new starter is full time. What do you think is it time to say goodbye to this mindee based on the fact he is making my dc miserable and my dh wont come home from work until he knows he has gone as can't be doing with the tears? Or do I persevere and see if he gets better (have had him since 5 months so not a settling in issue either. Would love to hear your comments TIA

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

littlelamb · 21/05/2009 10:04

I agree ali. I am very about these threads. Can you imagine if the mum read them??

alibubbles · 21/05/2009 10:12

Good post socks {smile}

pellmell · 21/05/2009 10:48

You sound completely clueless!

If have not already given this family notice, then you need to!.
You could contact your early years department and ask for a chat with one of their support staff. You could ask NCMA for some advice etc etc....have you?

Your posts say more about your inability to manage than they do about this child.
I'm sure this child is experiencing prolonged stress if nothing else.

You are supposed to have the interest of the child at the forefront of your service.
It amazes and upsets me that adults don't intervene and communicate with one another at the earliest opportunity!

pergol · 21/05/2009 17:39

As a first-time mum who is returning soon to work and looking for a childminder, I found the whole story deeply upsetting.

You don't tell us much about his family life, Ofstedoutstanding, you do tell us though about yours and how it has been compromised by the little devil. Do you really care, when you are paid to look after him but you prefer to hide behind your finger and ask for sympathy from fellow CM? Why haven't you asked for advice on your own free time?

At least, it seems there are CM out there with insight into children's behaviour and decency.

TheOtherMaryPoppins, Oligo, Baisey, Pellmell. Alibubbles, Redandgreensocks, do you work near Uxbridge? If yes, please reply. If not, thanks for bringing balance to this issue.

A worried mum

FabulousBakerGirl · 21/05/2009 17:44

I can't help feeling that if you are a trained CM you should have some clue about what is wrong with him. Surely as you have had him for a couple of years you know him by now.

And why two threads if you are then going to leave the other one when it doesn't go your way?

Are you really rated as Outstanding?

TotalChaos · 21/05/2009 17:46

He very much does sound like a child with a language problem. Does he often have difficulty answering your questions?

JenniPenni · 21/05/2009 18:05

He's been there 2 years???? Never saw that I know my lil ones inside out within a couple of months Any probs/potential probs are dealt with with the parents asap. If things (eg: language probs) aren't nipped in the bud, how can the necessary help be sought?

The fee is FAR less important than the happiness and wellbeing of the mindee and the CMs kids. As I said before... please give notice/seek proper aid in how to care for this little boy, asap.

TheOtherMaryPoppinsDiets · 21/05/2009 22:03

Not in Uxbridge nope, but my cousin(in-law) is in Harefield if that's any use.

OO any update for us? How was the wee mannie today? Did you get to talk to the parent?

Greatfun · 21/05/2009 22:19

I am appalled by the OPs approach to this 3 year old child. You talk about him as little more than an inconvenience to you. If a 3 year old child is crying all day he is clearly in distress. Surely you can work that out. You have spent a significant portion of your working day on here trying to get advice. The answer is looking back at you in the mirror. Please for the boys sake stop minding him.

This has made me so . You should be banned from looking after children you are clearly incapable.

alibubbles · 21/05/2009 22:19

I'm in Herts.

MissSunny · 21/05/2009 23:43

Message withdrawn

Oligo · 22/05/2009 00:29

Not near Uxbridge either.

I'm now using Ofout's AIBU post, as it seems to have more going on.

Flip

1 2