I will need childcare - possibly CM - from September. Friensd is registered CM, should I ask her?

[saadia]

I hope to start a part-time course in September for which I anticipate I will need pre-eschool and after-school care for dss (7 and 5) a few days a week. The school doea have an after-school, but not breakfast club. A friend - not really good friend but her ds is in ds2's class at school - is a registered CM. I mentioned to her that I may need her from September but as I don't know days and times I told her to take other mindees who come up and not to miss out.

Anyway I just have a few questions:

1. Is it a good idea to have friend as CM?
2. I thought I would just ask her to drop them home after school - will ask my mum to come and stay on those days - as I don't kmow how dss will get along with her dcs, do CMs do this?
3. Is there anything else I should consider or ask her?

its good to have a friendly reltationship with your cm. but i think you need to see it as a proffessional one first, then a afriendship, iyswim.
i have several friends who are cm's. one of whom is actually a very good friend, but i would never in a millino years consider using her as a childminder for my children, as i just dont agree with her methods of caring for the children. nothing wrong in how she does it, just not my idea of right for my kids.

i dont think cm's do drop off, but you can always ask.
good luck on the course

thanks stitchtime, I was concerned about the friendship aspect and whether she would "suit" my dss. I don't know her well enough to know her methods and ds2 isn't really friends with her ds even though they are in the same class so I don't know how that will work out.

Contact a variety of local childminders who are able to take/collect from that school. Visit them, let your DSs visit your top two and then make the choice.

If your DS2 does not get along with your friends child, then perhaps not a good idea for your DS2 to be with that child before and after school, as well as during school time.

thanks nannynick, there are very few who do drops and picks at that school, but I will keep looking. It's not that ds2 dislikes her ds just that they don't actually play together. But will definitely do visits with dss before deciding.

1. personally i will never work for friends or family

2.not sure if a cm would do this as if they had others they would be over their numbers for that short time

if your mum is going to be at your hosue, then why doesnt she pick your dc up from school?

i also think that if your dc and her dc dont get on very well, it would be unfair to make them spend time together after school

thanks Blondes..., I agree about the friends things but we are not really good friends - say hello and chat at school at the most. Mum doesn't drive and school is not walkable. She also has health issues but would be OK at home with dss. It's not that the boys don't get on, more that they they don't really know each other that well.

I do a pick up on the way to school and a drop off after school for a friend, but generally it is not a good idea to mix work and friendship, because it can cause problems. Up to you. Can you keep the minding side and the friendship side separate?

HSMM I think I can move it on to a more formal relationship, but I can also see why it is not ideal because it might be hard to broach any problems that might arise.

That's interesting that you do pick-ups. If she is prepared to drop them home that would probably be best. I think I might just talk it through with her and try and cover everything beforehand and see how it goes.

It would most likely be for two - perhaps three - days a week.

I actually have minded for friends (people I have got to know through toddler groups etc), and it has always worked well. They have already seen me "in action", and we have always been able to still maintain a professional (albeit friendly) relationship with regard to the childminding.

I have also dropped children off from a school pick-up, but would still charge for a minimum of one hour.

ThePrisoner, it's good to know it can be done. I think I will try and guage how it will work out. The dss's school is not walking distance from me and friend/cm doesn't live too far from me so that would make things easier in terms of picking up. Paying for the hour is fine I think, if she agrees to drop them home. The main problem at the moment is that I do not have a timetable and don't know when I will get one so I can't give her days and times yet.

I have become friends with mums i mind for, after time they get to know how you work so friendship can develop well, their are some parents that you have a lot in common with and some you don't particually relate to. I doubt very much that I would start minding a friends child who I already new well IYSWIM I try to keep the business thing as seperate as I can, it can get a bit awkward at times if they are late a lot picking up or if they don't pay on time . Personally if it is a good friend I wouldnt want to risk my friendship, another point is that three of my mindees mums are really good friends with other CM's and they chose not to use them even though they had spaces and were cheeper than me, so I think they obv want to keep things seperate too. I did a drop off on way back from school for a while, it was a total nightmare, parents never in or really late or someone I didnt know would be there and I wouldnt leave mindee so ended up taking them back with me anyway and then spending ages trying to contact parents, won't do it now and it eats into the ratios too much to make it vaible from a business point of view. I would have a look around it's always best to compare minders anyway if your ds doesn't have a particular friendship with the mindees son, they may be totally different and not hit it off, I tend to find children of this age know everyone in their class and decide who they do / dont want to hang out with.

Thanks for your views atworknotworking. It does seem to be the concensus that CMs are not keen to take on friends' children. It may be that my friend is not keen to take on my dss as she may be worried about the friend/professional aspect as well.

I can see why those things would annoy you but I can't see those problems arising with me as my mum would be at home and I hate owing people money. The school does have an (Ofsted-rated Outstanding) after-school club but I think dss would be happier this way.