What would you pay a mother's help, and does this sort of thing exist?

[WhatFreshHellIsThis]

DP is keen for me to have some help when he goes away on business - we have two DS's, one 3 year old and one 4 week old. DP goes away at least one night a week, if not two, but they're not always the same days iyswim.

DS1 is in nursery three days a week so we'd really want someone only on days DP goes away to help with nursery pick up, tea and bedtime, an extra pair of hands iyswim. Maybe some ironing as well. Unlikely to be in sole charge, certainly not of DS2, possibly occasionally of DS1, more helping me to get things done.

We'd want someone who didn't live in, to pay by the hour on an ad hoc basis (obviously if they weren't available on a particular day, then that's fine, we can't expect them to always be on call!)

We'd probably also use them for evening babysitting occasionally.

Does this sort of person exist, and how much would one pay them?

Hi yes they do exist, I am one of them. I am a nanny during the day but finish around 3 pm so for the last year I have worked for two different families and about to start with a third doing just what you are looking for, helping mums with new babies look after older toddlers, helping to keep their bedtime routine the same and helping out where needed. I charge £8 per hour for this.

Where abouts are you based and would you want someone with qualifications/experience as that will affect the cost to you.

Thanks eeyore! we are in bristol, I guess experience/qualifications not so essential as we're unlikely to be leaving them in charge much but would be nice.

I found someone like that and used them almost exactly as you described. It was a lifesaver when DH was away. I paid £8ph too. I found ringing some nanny agencies and talking to them hlped. The person I found had recently had her hours reduced with another family and was looking for temporary part time work, and was really flexible. I still use her on an ad hoc basis, I'm going to the hairdressers next week and will be there for about 3 hours, so I'm getting her to come over to look after DD.

There's an advert on Gumtree in my area for someone to help out a 'frazzled single mum' in the mornings, doing a bit of tidying, loading dishwasher, helping get children off to school (so not in sole charge of children, just helping out) and they are offering £10 per 1 1/2 hr session, so that's £6.66 per hour. But of course they're not looking for anyone with any qualifications, it could be a sensible teenage babysitter-type prson.

My friend has 3 DC and her DH often works late/is away. She has a wonderful woman come for 5pm-7pm every evening to help with tea/bath/bedtime routine. IIRC, she is a NNEB who works part time at a nursery.

Why don`t you advertise at the University?

Thank you! I might put an ad on Gumtree and see what we find, I'd rather have a recommendation but you never know. I'll ask at DS' nursery as well, they might know a nursery nurse who wants some extra hours.

the uni is a good thought except they'll disappear over the summer, so maybe I won't try that just yet.

Try the doula websites too. I've just employed my second (trainee) doula and my twins are 7 months old (also have a 3 year old). My first doula wants to do less hours as I think we've worn her out!

They both charge a flat £10 an hour and have lots of hands-on experience plus the doula course.

Other option is the job centre. It is free to advertise. We got loads of good quality applicants, most of whom were NNEB qualified. We were looking for someone for £8/9 per hours, for about 10 hours a week....but sometimes less than that/sometimes a bit more. It will generally be early mornings only.

Our mothers help starts in a few weeks time.

My friend had a student in to do this and another has a playworker from their son's nursery to babysit.

They do exist! I have recently employed a mother's help (since third child was born). DH works v long hours and is unavailable to help in the mornings or evenings. The girl who helps me out works 1 or 2 hours am and the same evening to help with tea/ bath. She also helps with folding laundry, ironing, etc. She charges me her usual babysitting rate, 6 pounds/ hour. It is expensive but I am finding it such a help while the baby is tiny!
Nurseries would be a good place to ask. My mother's help is a part time teaching assistant at my DD's school, so just works in the middle of the day. Also, might be worth contacting colleges with childcare courses as the students need to do placements or they may know newly qualified girls who haven't yet found jobs!
Good luck!

Thank you! All good tips - I have so far failed to do anything about it, but am going to ask at DS1's nursery tomorrow, and also put an ad up on Gumtree and see what/who turns up. Good to know that people do exist who want to do this kind of thing...DP is very keen on getting someone who also irons, as this is something I just do not do....