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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

really fed up of parents taking the piss

31 replies

leonifay · 27/04/2009 18:07

AGGGGHHHHHHH

this morning i got up bright and early to sort out the house ready for work today (had friends over last night so very messy today!) then sat waiting for an hour and a half waiting for mindees to arrive, phoned mum at 7.45 to check if they were still coming, she said they were running abit late and would be there soon. eventually turned up at 8.30 with no word about it. in what world is an hour soon and why do they think its ok to turn up an hour and a half late.

in amongst this waiting i had a major argument with dh, as he wasnt showered or dressed and he was late for work and mindees would be arriving any minute, () he went off to work in a huff and has been all day and now i have to deal with his stroppy behaviour all night.

then get this when dad picked them up this afternoon he had the cheek to ask if i could knock thoes hours, and the 3 lots of half hours they were late last week, off the bill as i wasn't actually working.

then parent of other mindee is quibbling this months bill because she turned up on the friday afternoon before easter holidays and casually mentioned that her dd wouldnt be coming for the next 2 weeks as they were going away for 1 week and dad had 2nd week off as holiday, and i've charged her full price for it. shes now claiming that when i poke to her initially she said that dd wouldnt be with me during the school holidays. thats funny considering i had her last school holiday. i've given her £25 off the bill, as a compromise, but she doesnt seem to think thats enough.

i think thats my vent over. right now what to cook for dh to make him happy?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

cookielove · 27/04/2009 18:09

get take out

atworknotworking · 27/04/2009 18:17

yep takeout and choccy - poor thing what a day, hopefully all the crappy stuff for the week will be today and it'll get better well done for sticking to your guns re holiday club fees though.

Blondeshavemorefun · 27/04/2009 18:25

hope you told dad where to go - you were avaiable to work therefore you get paid - not your fault they were 90mins late

take out or beer and steak works well for my dh

i though mindees had to pay at least 1/2 price if they went away as you are again able to look after them, but it is the parents choice not to use you

Shoshe · 27/04/2009 18:27

Leo do you have a handbook you give to parents?

Mine states in it that they pay for the space not the actual time that they decide to turn up.

Just because they are late does not mean that you are not up and ready for them.

I also have a policy in it stating that all holidays have to be booked by the twentieth of the month or they will be charged full price.

I do find having it in black and white stops this sort of dispute.

Original poster

leonifay · 27/04/2009 18:37

yes i have a 20 odd page hand book that says everything including that they pay for the time slot not the hours i actually work, and all holiday must be booked 4 weeks in advance. thats 4 weeks if i want to go away and 4 weeks if they want to go away, and a retainer fee for holiday taken. she wants the 2 weeks holiday free of charge NO CHANCE!!

take out sounds good, although he does LOVE my home made pasta and tomato sauce and i have some in the freezer...i might pretend that i've spent ages making it specially for him as he was in such a bad mood

OP posts:

spicemonster · 27/04/2009 18:41

God when I read of some of the stunts people pull I'm on behalf of CMs. I drop my DS off anywhere between 8 and 8.30 and pick him up anywhere between 5.30 and 6. On Thursdays he gets picked up at 3.30. I pay full days for every day he's with her. It would never occur to me to do otherwise.

spicemonster · 27/04/2009 18:43

Sorry, reading that back it comes across a bit as 'aren't I bloody marvellous' and it isn't meant like that at all. I am just appalled by the way so many CMs are treated by their clients. I feel like writing a guide - 'How to treat your CM'

Flibbertyjibbet · 27/04/2009 18:44

Refer them to the appropriate page in the handbook and say 'if you are not happy with the service then of course you are welcome to look elsewhere for childcare'.

We use a nursery, but every time I see threads like this I can't believe how other parents think its ok to treat their professional childcarers.

Tell that dad to sod off. Or say if you want to reduce the hours thats fine, and then two weeks later put your hourly rate up just for that family.

Northernlurker · 27/04/2009 18:47

This is outrageous! They should pay for the time you were expecting to work - and at least 1/2 price for hoidays they choose.

I pay for my daughter's nursery 8-6pm. I don't expect 50p back because I pick her up at 5.45!

thebody · 27/04/2009 19:14

This is why its VERY VERY important to make sure you have a watertight contract and more importantly that everyone knows where they stand. I have a lovely couple whose daughter started with me recently and thought they didnt need to pay me for bank holiday becaues their dd didnt come even though I was 'open'. i re read our contract and I had been vague about it really so I have renewed all my paperwork. It says,
childminder illness... no pay,
Childminder holiday.. no pay,
Child holiday .. full pay,
Child illness.. full pay,
Bank holiday... open as usual and full pay charged whether child attends or not.

I also now insist on the contract being discussed and signed in the evening with no distractions from any children so all can concentrate..

Mind you I have been very lucky with my parents who are all great.. poor you.. oh and tell dh to go suck a lemon..lol

Numberfour · 27/04/2009 19:25

spicemonster, it is parents like you that us childminders love and appreciate! Northernlurker, so many people still see childminding as a lesser form of childcare and childminders are just babysitters.

leonifay, i hope you managed to stick to your guns with the dad wanting a discount for time not used! bloody cheek.

i hope your day ends better than it started!

HSMM · 27/04/2009 20:40

I was with you this morning waiting for mindees that never turned up! No phone call. Nothing! I wonder if they'll come tomorrow? I could have had an extra half hour in bed. I wouldn't have given them any money back - you were available for work! (Depends what's in your contract of course)

Original poster

leonifay · 27/04/2009 21:38

thanks all, my dh came home and said he was taking me out for the evening (i was in tears when he walked through the door!)

i havent given dad any money, he was late i was still up at 5am! and i'm not giving other parent any more money off. i thought my contracts were water tight, they state that bh will have to be paid for, on wrap around children they state that half/term holdiays will still need to be paid for, any holiday will have to be paid for. i really wasnt expecting this!

HSMM - my problem is that when mindees are late i start thiniking i could have had 30 mins or what ever extra in bed! i hope they dont keep you waiting tommorow

OP posts:

thebody · 27/04/2009 23:11

glad your Dh came up to scratch,(actually that sounds sort of wierd) but you know what I mean. Your contracts do sound watertight so they are just taking the piss and its disgusting and so bloody mean..
stick to your guns and you might consider just mentioning how maxed out you are with enquiries for places.. might make them think a bit...
HSSM how rude not to even text that they are not coming.. I would have to have a few words if that was me unless there was a very good reason. and charge full wack anyway.

underpaidandoverworked · 28/04/2009 00:11

Stick to your guns - some [not all] parents really take the piss. I get calls asking 'can you keep dc an extra hr' when dc already has coat and shoes on ready to go home.

I walked out on a hosp appt - follow up appt after surgery - last week because I had to get back for dc who was coming for extra hours. Got home to find grandma had tried to drop him off 90 mins early - while i was still in hosp trying desperately to see consultant so could get home in time. Then got txt to say seeing as dc was already with grandma she was going to keep him the rest of the afternoon . Am considering charging cancellation fee as well as everything else....

Spicemonster, wish there were more parents like you out there............

HSMM · 28/04/2009 09:18

Guess what! No sign of them again this morning! Do they not realise that I worry about them and that their children were due to arrive 3/4 hour before anyone else, so I have to get up and get ready for them! (Still no refund)

AnguaVonUberwald · 28/04/2009 09:25

I am really shocked by all of this, we pay our childminder the full fee whenever we drop him off. She lets us drop him off a little early, (discussed before signing contracts) but then we nearly always pick him up a bit early as well.

We pay for our holidays and half price for hers.

Yesterday we dropped him off late, and picked up early, still expect to pay full fee.

We pay for bank holidays, but she will take him on those days, so sometimes we drop him in for a few hours to get a little time on our own together, but we still pay the full fee.

She takes care of our child for us, that means that we have to respect her (or why is he there), and if she doesn't respect us, then why is he there. It has to work both ways

AnguaVonUberwald · 28/04/2009 09:26

I mean, we pay the full fee, whenever he is due to be there!

HSMM · 28/04/2009 09:35

Well .... we always have a packed lunch on a Tuesday, because we eat at the Childminder Drop In. I have made a packed lunch for 4 children, 2 were due at 0800 and 2 were due at 0930. I am pretty sure the later 2 will come, but what about the others? (reminds self ... ask if they have been to Mexico)

alibubbles · 28/04/2009 10:24

One of mine hasn't arrived yet, I am paid from 8-6, she picks up at 4.45.

If I need her to come early if I have toddler group or drop in, I tell her the night before what time she must be here or I will go out and she will have to catch up with me, it works!

HSMM · 28/04/2009 12:28

I go out without them and charge full rate, but what about my sleep and the food and activities I prepare for children who don't turn up?

HSMM · 28/04/2009 12:34

and ... Leonifay - sorry for hijacking your thread!

and ... I worry about them. Why aren't they here? Has something happened to them?

stealthsquiggle · 28/04/2009 12:37

We tend to drop DD off late / pick her up early from nursery in a slightly random manner, but (a) we pay for the full hours and (b) when they are going somewhere (down the road to leaps&bounds) I make an effort to make sure she is there on time. TBH, it's one of the reasons I use nursery rather than a CM - we have unpredictable lives, they are there and staffed anyway and if DD isn't there then I figure it just lowers the ratios rather than messing one individual around.

NO WAY should you consider a reduction in fees - they pay for the hours booked, not the hours they use (and I would charge extra for anti-socially early booked start IIWY!)

HSMM · 28/04/2009 12:50

I have no problem with them not turning up, or arriving late, or leaving early, as long as I know, so I can make plans accordingly. I am happy to be flexible to any of the families, but a little bit of information goes a long way.

Ripeberry · 28/04/2009 13:43

Depends what area you are in. Some parents take the p*ss because they have lots of CMs to choose from as no-one round here is full

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