Not sure if I am being pathetic or mum is taking me for granted....

[Numberfour]

I usually have little B one day a week after preschool. I contacted mum today to say can he either come earlier at 9 or usual time. She said she was going to drop him off in between 9 and normal time but then pick him up at usual time.

This would mean one hour extra with me.

She did not ask me if it was okay. It only came up when I raised the matter of timings for tomorrow.

Now she has a problem in that she is out all day (on outing, not at work) and her DP is working til B's normal pick up time. So they only thing they can do is drop him early and collect at usual time.

i don't want to do more hours tomorrow and I had not been asked about it.

I am waiting to hear now if B is coming early and leaving early or normal time and leaving normal time.

I assume if i hear nothing it will mean normal time drop off?

I have a good relationship with the family but feel a bit that I am being taken for granted.

Oh, don't worry, we can just drop B off early at #4's.

No, you can't! I have other things I need to do.

or is that a bit pathetic on my part for one hour when a lovely family and gorgeous B is involved???

I think it ddepends on previous conversations. Is it clear he comes at a certain time and that never changes, or does it vary and you work out what she owes you on the hourly basis? I probably wouldn't make an issue this time for the sake of one hour. But, would tighten the reins on how things work going forward. It works out better for everyone if everyone understands everyone elses expectations. And it sounds like communication has maybe entered a shade of grey here.

I wouldn't expect anyone to drop off before their contracted time, unless they had pre-arranged it. My DH is always telling me to hide if we hear people arrive in the drive early (but they know me well now and stay in their car until their expected time). I went through a bad phase early on in my CM history with people dropping their children off early and collecting them late.

and .... do they normally pay you while little B is at pre school? (I would expect to be available for the paid time in this case)

it is clearly agreed that i collect B from preschool at 11.30 and she is collected at 5.30. very very seldom does it go much past 5.45 pick up and because of the long relationship we have enjoyed I don't bill for that extra little bit of time.

i do invoice them each month and they pay by direct debit each week.

HSMM, i do not get paid while he is at preschool.

i have just checked my texts and it says that dad finishes work at 5.30 which will mean late pick up (he works very flexi time, if at all) again without clearing it with me.

so early drop off and late pick up with asking me.

i am going to assume he will be dropped here at 11.30 and collected at 5.30 unless i hear to the contrary from them.

i had a problem li8ke this i sent a letter out saying i was going to charge a late fee of 10 pounds every time latness occures without notice and then 5 pounds every 15 mins plus hourly rate ,this is standard in my contracts now the parent concerned soon got the message as it added an extra 130 pounds to her bill it soon stpped it good look .

imo i wouldnt have a problem with it

I have a mindees' mum who rings me at 9am to say isnt coming at 10 (pays on day, my fault i know) and same mum gets me to give lifts to where she is going when she asks me to collect mindee, and also, on one occasion, when i turned up to drop off a toy left by mindee, asked me to go to shop and get a pint of milk

actually thats not taking for granted, that taking the pi**

B was picked up an hour after end of contract period

i need the courage to bill parents. thing is they never look at their invoices, just let the money go by direct debit each week. i always have to point out if they owe anything or i owe them.