Am I correct in thinking it is a Mother's Help that I am looking for?

[MadMarg]

I have a DS, almost 2 and am pregnant. I currently have DS in nursery 2 days a week to give myself a break, and want to start studying at home.

I can't stand housework, and am really falling behind (my fault completely!) so have thought about hiring a cleaner for 2 half days a week.

But then I thought that I might actually be better off with a Mother's Help for about 3 days a week, and that would probably cost less than the nursery 2 days a week and a cleaner (and I would have a bit of help with the new DC if I got really tired and needed to lie down or even have a shower!).

Is this the sort of help that I could expect from a Mother's Help? I don't think I would actually be leaving them with sole care of both children very often, but maybe letting her take the older one out for activities sometimes.

Thing is DS loves nursery and I think he gets so much out of playing with the other children - I don't have any friends with children around his age so he doesn't mix with other children that often otherwise, but he needs to be there for at least 1 1/2 days a week. Also, when he turns 3 I would get a discount at the nursery as they will apply the government subsidy.

How much of the cleaning would you be expecting the MH to do?

My experience of mother's help is they do pretty much what you want, within reason and obviously you need to make it clear from the off what you would like.
Mine have always done a mixture of childcare, cleaning, washing, ironing, tidying, all the general housework stuff.

I have never asked any to take a child out, it has always been within the home, but if the MH is happy with that then why not?

SimpleAsABC - I guess the general cleaning things - such as vaccuming and mopping, and probably bathrooms (dont' like doing them when DS is around because of the chemicals) and some ironing. Oh, and tidying toys, that is a constant with children though, but DS is getting old enough to start putting toys away now. Oh, and ironing, especially DH's shirts. Spread over 3 days I would assume that about half the time would be on the cleaning duties at a moderate pace (wouldnt' expect the same pace as a proper cleaner as such), and about half the time would be with the children.

If there was someone to 'help' with the housework, I would probably do more little things because the jobs won't seem so darn huge.

kittywise - here's hoping I get a nice one like yours then! Guess I wouldn't necessarily ask her to take the DC's out, but would use her cleaning time as a good excuse to get out of the house.

I am a MH and my role involves about 90% childcare and 10% cleaning/housework. I cook for the DCs and clean up after meals. Load and unload the dishwasher. Hang clothes up to dry if I have time. Tidy toys away. Lay school uniform out. I don't do any proper cleaning.
The role of MH varies from household to household though and you will find some who do 10% childcare and 90% housework. The idea is to help the mother, with whatever needs doing. The most important thing is that you advertise the job for what it is. Make it clear that you want both housework and childcare, this way you won't waste your time or the applicants' time. Equally, you won't end up with someone who is unwilling to do housework because they equate the title MH with childcare.

Thank you MuffinToptheMule - that's good to know, and I guess I will have time to think about what it is I want. Cooking and cleaning up after DCs, aren't most nanny's willing to do that too though? That was the point of wanting a MH, to get them to do cleaning that wouldn't be part of a nanny's duties.

I had originally thought of an au pair but tbh I want more housework than I think it is fair to ask an au pair for what they get paid - and I'm not sure I really want someone living in.

I think asking a MH to do cleaning/washing/ironing would be fine - also think it would be fine to have sole charge of the children occasionally too. A MH should be just that - an extra pair of hands for the mother, so helping out with any jobs you would normally do. As Muffin said, just be clear in the advert that it's a 50% split cleaning to helping out with the children.

advertise on gumtree

my SIL has an au pair and the poor girl does nothing but clean!

7am - 12 noon Mon - Fri.

As long as you write in the advert what your expectations are, you should find the right person.

Au pairs aren't on that bad an amount of money - £60 pocket money, plus food, plus all of their bills paid for, a warm room usually in a nice house (which in my area alone would be about £100 per week). All for 25 hours a week.

i have been a mothers help and i didnt do cleaning bathrooms. its still cleaning/tidying things to do with the children, like a nanny, but theres not the responsibilty of sole charge of the children. when the children were asleep i done childrens ironing and dads shirts but not all families ironing. you're probably better off with an au-pair to do these things. an idea is to look for a newly qualified student from college. they would appreciate the experience but it wont be daunting for them like going straight into a sole charge job would be. you can call up your local and advertise, thats where i found my first job.
Mothers help start from £6ph so think what you would do for £6ph, not scrubbing someone elses toilet i bet!
a mothers help is just like an extra pair of hands.
i was mothers help for a 3yr old and newborn twins. i entertained the toddler whilst the mum breastfed/expressed then i cuddled the babies whilst mum had time with the toddler.
hope this has helped you at all!

Muffintop and no1cm, can I ask what you charge for being a MH? I am thinking of getting one in June but the prices in Berkshire seem to vary hugely, £7 up to £15 per hour!!!!! And to a CM, that is a huge amount of money considering I only charge £3.75 per child for CMing!!

I'd be interested to know the rates too. I would have assumed they would be around the same as for a nanny or cleaner.

I'm hoping that because I'm looking for hours that would suit a mother with children (during the day while children are at school) that I might find it a bit easier to find someone (please don't destroy my hopes on that one !)

Well I'm live-in now, like an AP, but before I lived in I was paid £5.50ph. I often had sole charge of some of the children. The family have 4 children. When I started the youngest was six months old, she is now 2.6. It is worth noting though, that I have no childcare qualifications. This job is for the sole purpose of funding myself through university. Someone who has childcare qualifications or many years experience may require more money. I am thinking of becoming a tutor instead though, as I will do practically the same work as I do here but for more than double the money!

P.s. I am in Aberdeen. I MHed in London when I was at 6th form and was paid £5 an hour.

they will need to be paid at least minimum wage if they are live out

There are three levels of minimum wage, and the rates from 1 October 2008 are:

£5.73 per hour for workers aged 22 years and older
A development rate of £4.77 per hour for workers aged 18-21 inclusive
£3.53 per hour for all workers under the age of 18, who are no longer of compulsory school age

mothers help is around £6ph, to give you an idea of the price difference with MH and a nanny, nannies start at around £8ph depending on years experience etc. (thats in my area, walton on thames) even if a MH has years of experience they are still cheaper than a nanny as they arent left in sole charge of your child/ren. most highly experienced childcarers opt to being a nanny and MH's are usually fresh from college.
hope this helps!