Youngest starting school in Sept... what to do?

[NiftyNanny]

I've been working for a lovely family on fantastic terms for just over a year now. I have very little to complain about and I think they're pretty happy with me, too.

In Sept the youngest will start full time in Reception. MumBoss is adamant that she wants to keep me on for holidays and after school "until (youngest) is at least twelve or so!". However... I can't see her wanting to pay me full time hours for what amounts to 12 hours after school care per week. Not even the best nanny in the world would be worth that, with the salary I'm on. I can't afford to take a pay cut when there are other families who would offer me full time work.... and I don't think she expects me to. I don't want to work as a cleaner, but the chances of finding someone to care for from 9.30 - 3 is slim, right?

I'm loathe to take a younger one on as a share, as the eldest goes to a school a fair commute away and is still too young to get himself home on the tube alone. I'm sure I'd cope, but I don't think it would be practical or fair on the children to be running everyone around in a car for an hour a night (also... I would rather use public transport when it's easily available but that's an issue I have to raise with my boss when I pass my driving test). Evenings are hectic as it stands with Tutors, after school clubs, etc.

I would feel bad leaving them in the lurch and trying to find a Nanny that would be happy doing after school and holidays only but I know there are people out there that it would suit a lot better than me. There's also never going to be a "good" time to leave, but maybe September would be the right time as they would have a chance to settle a new Nanny during the summer holiday? Or perhaps January so they have a clearer idea of what the new hours and job would entail?

I'm sure someone else here has had experience of this happening - as it's likely to in any nanny job - can you let me know your thoughts and experiences please... I do love that this place is a wealth of knowledge from both the Boss and the Nanny points of view

Oh, the other factor is that I'm having a 2 week honeymoon during term time, which they're not happy about. If I quit before the wedding so they didn't have to cover my honeymoon, that would still leave a long run up to Summer for someone else to fill - and it wouldn't be an accurate representation of the job AFTER summer. If I waited til afterwards I think they would feel as though I had really taken advantage.

However, my contract states that I'm allowed to choose 2 weeks and we can't really afford to change the wedding date or take a 2 weeks honeymoon during the summer hols.

I suppose if I DID leave in Sept, I would offer to adjust my notice period or do a week unpaid to address any holidays I'd taken over my allowance.

If i was you id leave during summer. Then the kids would be around to get used to new nanny..finding something 9-3 is really slim unless prehaps in a nursery but then thats rare..If i was you id look out for yourself i know you feel bad but you have to benifit yourself..one friend said to me before when i was in the situation.."you cant look out for the parents , they are already earning enough to keep them happy." So you need to balance your financial needs as its important you have enough to keep you living how you are..Im sure you'll miss the kids but prehaps you could do babysitting etc and always go to see them but as for the after school nanny i wouldnt do that unless you find a morning nanny job..Sorry ive ranted on

Speaking as a MB if it were me I would detest a nanny leaving in September most of all..JUST when youngest is starting school.

and the summer holidays would be a real PITA as well.

i think it would soften the blow to the family if you leave so that the new arrangement begins in January.

Youngest starting school is often the time when people switch to au pairs instead of nannies, don't know if your employers have the room for an au pair.

I'm a bit confused .. it's january now.

presumably OP is planning ahead?!

Oh i presumed OP meant the youngest started school this september not next september

this happened to me in my last job,was there since no 2 was 5weeks old, and left when she was 5 and at school as mum didnt want to pay me fulltime to work a few hours a day ( plus i got bored, so happy to leave)

i said it would be best for me to stay till oct half term, to get no 2 into school, rather than lose me who she had known all her life, start a new school and get a new after school nanny

all worked well

Thanks guys, my instinct WAS to stay 'til after little one had started, so there wasn't too much chopping and changing. By then the role for part time care would be easier to define, and I would've worked a whole year negating any quibbles over holiday allowance and so on as I run Jan - Jan.

I will have to talk to MumBoss about it as she seems to be convinced it will all work with me going part time and/or working for someone else during the day - I guess it's just one of those things when you have children growing up, sooner or later a full time arrangement isn't practical! I'm shy of mentioning it too early though and make everyone stress about it, although I don't want her to look really hard for a share or other arrangement that would only continue for 3 months. If we didn't, though, would you be really annoyed at having to pay the extra for a part time nanny or would you think it worthwhile to continue the care until a suitable replacement arrangement came into effect? Basically, I feel it would sour things if I were only working 12 hours a week, but then again if it's only for 3 months it might be worthwhile to make life run that bit smoother.

Interesting point about having an au pair instead, as they would be able to cover longer hours in the holidays if they were willing, do extra babysitting etc.

Yes, I'm planning well in advance for Sep 09 but I didn't want to get to the point where we were all unhappy with a costly set up, I was bored or resenting spreading myself over several jobs just to keep my income stable, they were resenting paying me for 12 hours a week.... yada yada

Oh, also, I am getting married this year and would like to go backpacking with my husband at some point - ideally early 2010. If I was out of work from October I would find it a struggle to last until Christmas - I wouldn't be able to take on permanent work with a good conscience. But then again my conscience would be plaguing me for getting paid full time wages for 12 hours a week. I guess that's my problem though, if I choose to leave the country in Jan then it's my fault I wouldn't be able to take perm. work in Oct. I guess I could try and persuade him to come earlier if I did find myself unemployed! There's bound to be work for English speaking nannies in Australia, Canada...

I will have a chat with MumBoss at my review and find out whether she thinks Oct half term or end of Dec term would be the better time to finish. My ideal would be Dec, but I know it's unlikely that she'd want to pay me til then. Am I stupid for worrying about it so early?

Blondes, your post was really helpful!

glad to be of help

tbh most parents, should be happy to pay a nanny for 6 weeks of first half of winter term when child at school - yes you may be doing 12hrs, but you are there on call

i did go in and help with listening to children read once a week as well at school - which school really appreicated

i did the shopping and then time was my own, and as i said i got bored, its boring having 8.30 - 3.30 free - there is only so much lunch/gym/shopping etc you can

nothing wrong with planning ahead

and yes if you do stay, it is hard to find work 10-3 ,maybe a mum at school might like a morning free to shop with her children

but if you arrange to take on a 3mth temp job and your current charge was ill/sick/off school what would happen to temp job?

Yes good point about the possibility of them being off sick! That is really reassuring, of course I would be "on call" and I'm sure that after the school drop there are things I could busy myself but would still have a bit of time to myself. Sounds too cushy to be true from my perspective but you're right, it is only 6 weeks or so. Plus I'd be there to help out any new person starting if we overlapped for a week.

Phew, this is all much clearer in my head now.

It's my first long term Nanny job (I retrained at 26) I love the work but I'm coming up against these technical issues for the first time. So good to have support here!

again from parent perspective I would have happily paid my nanny to stay on for a short while after DS started school. i could afford it before he started, and nothing else would have changed.
It would definitely have helped if she did something extra, I like Blonde's idea of helping out at school, or perhaps I could have negotiated with her that she would do some extra work around the house.

As it happens she left in July and we have been OK, but I am able to be at home a lot.

And I just remembered that DS only did half days for the first term. I would have bitten her hand off if she agreed to stay and pick him up every day at 1.00! Even if your charge goes full time, will there be other children finishing early for a term??

Thanks, iheartdusty... at the mo I have been doing bits and pieces around the house while he's at nursery so maybe I could do a bit extra and put the cleaner out of a job... it's something I would be happy to do although I suspect I'm not nearly as efficient as the cleaner, she's brilliant (and she can iron men's shirts... which gives me the heebie jeebies, I've never been able to get them just so)

It did cross my mind whether he's likely to be a half time starter or just go straight into full days. I suspect the latter, though there may well be someone who I can take for the afternoons, good one. That would help assuage my guilt and at least get a little money coming from elsewhere to relieve the burden on my boss.

I've been gearing up to helping at school in the mornings now, so that would definitely be a good thing to do! Shows willing that I'm not just wanting to sit around and UM... surf the internet, for example!

Speaking of which... vanishes to buy wrapping paper

When I was little I remember my best friend had a nanny. She did the drop offs and pick ups at school, had them when they were ill and in the holidays, did all the playdates, did the cleaning around the house as well as doing the household shopping and cooking the evening meal.