AP vs after school nanny

[HarrietTheSpy]

It's possible, after all the hemming and hawing I have done over the last several months, we will actually be able to hire a nanny who will do after school only work. It would work out at £130 per week gross for the hours we need.

DH is still doing his own hemming and hawing about whether an ap is better. This is while still expressing some uncertainty over living in.

RE the cost point, my argument to him is that in London lots of APs expect to get 100 a week anyway. I can't see how an AP would only cost us 30 quid more a week, plus we would have the factor of loss of privacy, all the uncertainty around whether we should be entertaining them at the weekend, etc.

I actually think the after school nanny is really good value and will give us the most piece of mind. Anyone else think I'm right???

If you're unsure about sharing your home with an au pair, I would go for the nanny. Having been an au pair when younger myself, I think for it to work the family really needs to be into the cultural exchange/host family experience rather than just looking for childcare.

I agree with you, our AP costs us about £650 a month I think (£85 per week pocket money but also food, petrol, car insurance, gym membership, meals out etc).

How many hours will she do? Can she help with homework? Does she need to drive? Fix childrens' meals?

Is it not quite hard to find a nanny who will just do after school hours?

She'll be doing about 16 hours for us. Fully qualified. Can drive - someone could walk to school but this means she can also easily take DD1 to playdates/birthday parties etc which can be a pain to organise. Can also take DD2 from the nursery so her days are shorter. The big big downside with the APs I've met so far is that I just wouldn't trust them with both children unsupervised (while awake and DD2 still doesn't sleep well) for...well, any period of time. Maybe an hour, but tops, and I think I would still worry a bit. So DD2 would really be looking at an 8.20 to 6.30 nursery day maybe three days a week (more if they won't let me work from home). Can help with homework and supposedly cooks.

Yes, Lily this was the problem. Needle in a haystack sort of situation. But we may have just found someone.

Harriet, APs cost a lot in terms of invisibles. Our first AP could eat for France. Really it was colossal the amount he would eat - our food bills went up by £50 a week. Then of course the additional heating, etc. Throw in a travel card or two and a mobile phone contract and our APs ended up costing around £200 a week.

This is what I'm thinking could well be the case the 'hidden costs' adding up to significantly more than this nanny would cost us, even with some overtime, with none of hte piece of mind that comes with having someone trained and more experienced.

Met an AP/MH prospect this weekend who was genuinely suprised that I wouldn't offer her several days sole charge work with no qualifications, very limited experience (would be a relative giving her a reference essentially), and fresh out of secondary school.

think you are right going down the after school nanny rather than an ap

you might find it easier if you have nanny with their own child - are you agreeable to that?

I think the after school nanny sounds good so long as you are prepared to change course when and if she leaves. Sounds like the chances of replacing her a are fairly slim. However I think that tide may be changing in the nanny market place. So, maybe in 6 or 12 months it might not be so hard to find someone who is willing to do after school hours.

Agree with Athene. As you have found a nanny who is suitable, then it makes sense to employ them - the cost isn't that much more than an AP/MH given the 'hidden' extras that come with having live-in help. Also you don't have the hassle of having someone else living in your home 24/7.
The nanny market is changing, more part-time jobs than full-time jobs. So when the nanny does leave, it may well be easier to replace them.

APs are not the cheap option that those who have never employed one think they are.

You have a qualified nanny who will do exactly the hours you want, won't be hanging around the rest of the week for less than the (real) cost of an AP.

No brainer.

deffo this nanny, snap her up and treasure her.

Harriet, I agree with what has already been said.

The hidden costs of an aupair are fixed costs per month (food, room, utilities, car insurance, breakages). If you only require 16 hours, you are paying more hidden costs per hour than that of a standard aupair who works at least 25 hours.

Plus you might struggle to find an aupair to work 16 hours for less than the going rate for a 25 hours aupair because the pocket money will be too little to survive on.

For me, just the fact that you need a driver means that if a nanny is a viable option, to go for the nanny.

Thanks for all your messages.

It's not total shangri-la. For one thing, she can only do our job if another particular job she's going for works out for her in the am. If not, we're back to square one. Also, what do I do if it breaks down half way through for whatever reason (ie they don't want to continue but we do etc etc.) Hence the outstanding queries really. Plus there might be a limited lifespan for another reason (but not more limited than it probably would be with an au pair anyway - I'm guessing we'd be fortune to get a quality six months from someone.)

Would I consider a nanny with their own child - maybe, depends on the age of the child and the other commitments they had.

I could fill an APS time for 25 hours, with the nanny we will be foregoing morning help, for one thing. Would pay the £100, it's just how much more it REALLY works out on top of that. At least with a nanny I feel like the costs are more knowable.

HarrietheSpy am going through a similar decision. I have previosly had two wonderful au pairs but have had awful luck this yr. First one 18yr old canadian slept with half of our village and then lied about her need to go home (nan had died who then telephoned!) followed by a german 17yr old who crashed the car, shrank my new dress, forgot to pick up my kids and then lcoked us out of the house for the night. She promtly left.
Have had enough of AP's and am looking for after school help as can manage the mornings and school holidays. Finding it tricky to find someone longer term for those hours but for the sake of someone repsonsible and reliable plus not having to worry about entertaining them, feeding and have them hover every night while I try to chat to DH, might be worth it.

Those that need after school help have you considered contacting the local college and asking if any of those doing a child care course would be intersted in some after school babysitting.

or as you need a driver the local university for those undertaking degrees in child related topics - teaching, nursing, psychology etc.

The thing that has kept us with the au pair option is the babysitting. I agree that hidden costs add up and loss of privacy is an issue, but 2 night babysitting a week is brilliant for us. We hardly ever use both nights, but I do like not having to rush home for the sitter and also being able to pop out fr a drink, or to the cinema, without having to book someone. We are in London so the cost of babysitters is astronomical and that makes the au pair option a goood one for us. However, when ds2 goes to reception next Sept, I will do my sums again, and look at the after school nanny option. Good luck with your decision.