am I being oversensitive re nanny

[hollyivypoppy34]

ok I'll admit its a first time hire and pfb..but am I being a bit too sensitive here. I've got a couple of nanny candidates I'm seriouisly looking at -one is quite clear she wants something for the longer term (wants to get a mortgage, qutie experienced, bit older, good history of long service). The other is keen on job for at least a year (her words) but is quite open re fact her and dh likely to want to move to country in medium term/start a family.

Now I know you cant' see the future but i'd ideally like to avoid having to go through the hassle of finding someone else as much cos I'd prefer to minimise disruption to dd as hassle it causes. Am I being OTT here? To be clear I think i'll be less worried about this in future when dd is older and i'm a bit more clued up about the process but if poss I'd like to have the same nanny for at least the next couple of years til she is about 3 or so.

the other hting is that candidate 1 is asking quite a lot more than candidate 2 - mainly as needs something for her mortgage application. can see her pov but this is a fair bit more than market round here at present and she also doesnt have same qualifications/needs to be ofsted registered - I'm going to raise the issue of this with her . is this reasonable (I've just crunched the numbers and we're talking about a couple of grand more so its a fair difference over market for someone who needs to get ofsted registered and has no recent experience with young children).

I don't think it's OTT. Obviously there are no guarantees with the first one either but if she's more likely to stay and continuity is important, there's nothing wrong with selecting her on that basis. Assuming of course that you would be happy for either candidate to look after your child.

It's definitely something I would take into account. It's not just the hassle of finding someone else but also I would wonder whether someone who viewed the position as temporary would do as good a job as someone who was planning on staying for a longer period, had a mortgage and financial commitments etc. My experience (we've had 2 nannies) is that the one who wanted a long-term position was more professional, punctual, reliable etc.

x-post. No reason you can't haggle with salary, particularly if she has no qualification and no experience with young children - doesn't sound as though she should be paid over market rate anyway.

Ofsted registration isn't anything negative though - presumably you are wanting her registered so you can claim childcare vouchers. That's your decision and something you should pay for and sort out in my view. When I get round to doing it I will pay and organise it for my nanny.

so basically you like the 1st nanny more as she plans to stay a while but wants more money then 2nd - is that right?

2nd nanny might not move/was honest in the fact she wants a family

would you allow your nanny to come back with her baby?

you can def negociate salary - how much ectr a week/month is she asking then no 2?

tbh there are no guarantees that a nanny will stay in a job long term, though mine have been 4/5 years each

thanks all - blondes you're right that I liked nanny 1 more I think although nanny 2 was also very nice and seemed to have a real love for the job. I'd be ok with either in the role.

mrshappy -the dedication thing is exactly it as I know there are no guarantees re future stay.

re the qualifications thing/ofsted, its more that I've been told that I have to pay for candidate 1 to be registered (she does afirst aid courseso thats a couple of hundred quid difference)

I'd need to think about letting nanny take baby in but its not an automatic no - its more it a cost/hassle getting maternity cover.

the other thing is dh reckoned nanny2 smoked (you could smell it on her which may be sometwhere you'd been/her dh smoked) but this is a no (and said as much to the agency)... dh is so vehement on this wants to make it a gross misconduct condition (ie smoking on/around our dd) -is that ott?

also re salary - is it worth raising this now? she is coming back to meet dh (second interview as it were) and given this is pretty critical (along with checking she can work the hours ) is it worth raising now or later? no point in her coming in (and me trying to keep dh sober at his works xmas lunch as he is doing it later that day) if its a non negotiable.

If she doesn't have qualifications then I don't think OFSTED registration is so straightforward. I think she needs to attend a suitable childcare course first. I would negotiate with her over who pays for that, include something in the contract about endeavouring to obtain OFSTED registration and to meet the requirements etc. £2K above market rate - is she that good, do her references support her salary expectations? If you are paying above market rate then she will probably stay for longer since she will have difficulty getting another job paying so well. However, you could still try negotiating her down a bit on salary. How did the 'at least a year' candidate measure up in terms of experience, references etc? Still worth considering her as well I think.

PS - just saw the bit about nanny 2 smelling of smoke. That would concern me too - definite no no around babies and I don't think it is OTT to make that a gross misconduct matter. If you are still considering her then I would ask her whether she or partner smokes as you could smell it on her. Its possible she just met up with a smoking friend before you saw her. Also give her a trial period with a short notice period during that time. If she stinks of smoke every day then just get rid of her!

IMO nanny should pay to meet REQUIREMENTS for OFSTED reg - in order to be taken seriously we should have an appropriate 1st aid cert and insurance and some form of qualification anyway so as a nanny I pay for those myself. If I had a qualification not approved by OFSTED eg old-style NNEB I might ask for the employer to contribute to cost of updating. I'm aware that I might be a bit of an oddity on this. I think nannies are all agreed employer should pay for CRB and registration fee though because it's a benefit to them and not in any way helpful to the nanny.

When you say doesn't have the same qualifications is it a BTEC vs NVQ vs NNEB vs DCE issue, which are all level 3, or does one candidate have a level 2 qualification and the other a level 3 or do they both have the same basic qualification but one has added more courses to her portfolio?

No problems with smoking around your DD being a gross misconduct issue but I have to say my DP smokes and therefore I can smell of it so don't automatically assume that she does (which you haven't). Sometimes I turn up to work and think "ick my coat smells" so I hang it outside if possible and definitely wouldn't let it near a very little one. Raise it with her and see what she says. If it's that she doesn't then decide whether you can live with the smell because you won't have the worry about her actually smoking around your DD/excreting nicotine through her skin.

Good luck with second interview!

did no 2 say she didnt smoke? agree not ott to have gross mis in contract IF she smokes around the child

yes nanny should pay to be up to scratch for ofstead, but as franikin said if employer wanted me to be reg and my NNEB isnt up to scratch then yes I would expect employer to pay for the common skills course that i might need

2k more is about £40 a week more is that right?

all academic now as candidate 1 has decided she wants to work with older children... prob as well as I'm not sure that would have been abel to meet her costs. Out of interest not sure she had any qualifications but lots of experience.

checked with agency and she doesn't smoke (and as frannikin said I can't legislate for what dh does)..its really around baby that is problem ..

Holly, are going through an agency exclusively or have you had a nose around yourself as well? It seems that you are paying a fee fro someone your not really all that happy with.

I realise nanny1 has backed out. But there are so many nannies out there, I wouldn't break the bank for one I sorta mostly klike but not too sure about.

Is this a live-in or live-out position? Where are you?

My view is that I wouldn't break the bank to meet her salary expectations if I would be resentful if she then left in six months anyway because that can (and often does) happen. So if she costs you say an extra £300 per month and she stqays for 12 months will you then think jeez, that was £3600 I didn't need to spend and she's gone anyway.

If you really want her to stay for two years, I'd offer a bit less and usse the savings as a two year bonus if she stays on that long. So, say offer £100/month less but then offer a £2000 bonus after 2 years of service.

All candidates are agency so far (got ad in netmums and one going in nannyjob in jan as they didnt want to take it earlier but nothing from these yet).

its live out in sw london. Have just seen a much more qualiified and experienced nanny so am hopeful re her - played down salary discussion here as didnt want to get tied into it (and she was a lot more open minded - admitted agency had suggested higher fee )

good thought re bonus -as you say I wouild be hacked off if she'd buggerd off...think may use that on this one as she has history as a temp

The long service bonus is a good one in my view. Work out what you want to pay, offer below that amount, then if the candidate stays you can give them a bonus as and when you decide, such as 6 month review, 1 year anniversary, etc.

Is Gumtree worth advertising on given your area?

thanks nick - yes it is. but am holding off on that til jan (as on nannyjob) as told that is best time to ask so will send ad at weekend if this nanny doesnt work out.

and am defo going to factor in long service bonus in some way