Pg and need someone to look after dd if I go into labour in the evening/overnight

[Ally90]

Advice please!

My dd will be 2.11yrs (if baby arrives on time ) and our options are, dh stays with her, or someone else. We have no relatives to ask so would you as a childminder/nanny consider doing an overnighter for someone you don't usually contract with? Or is that a really unreasonable to ask? Naturally would pay the rate they asked...and would have to get dd used to cm/nanny...she's quite particular about who she likes and I do know one local cm she seems fond of...just don't wish to offend.

Also do you know if doula's would look after dd instead of me when I'm in labour? I just want to know my dd is safe at home. Oh and during the day I think my friend would happily take her so no need to take dd during day when you could be working...

Is that enough info? Really appriciate any ideas/thoughts/advice.

Thank you

How about your neighbours?

I wouldn't be able to help you as a nanny, as you would not be able to give a date and time.

i don't know sweetheart, i tmay be a case of insurance for the cm but you could always ask x

any chance friend mentioned would have her if it is middle of the night? Ask her she can only say no!

yes i have done overnights before for my family that i work for and also through agencies in emergancy's

could your friend not take your dd if you go into labout at night?

where are you?

Have you thought about a home birth? Though I suppose back up would still be needed in case you need to go in at the last minute.

I'm in Yorkshire. I would really like my dd to stay in bed and not be moved in the middle of the night iyswim. I would worry less. And there is the transport, my dh would have to wake her, 10 min drive, drop off...what if I needed ambulance transfer? Dh would have to follow behind, make sure dd is settled and could have missed the whole birth. I was quite fast the first time so I'm thinking worst case scenario here I suppose...midwife says if waters go and contrations start I most likely will have baby within the hour!! Got me thinking all sorts of things...which I should post elsewhere!! Gone off topic a bit!

Thanks for your replies, at least I can start working out what to do

I am in the same position as you! I have now employed a doula who has said she is happy to stay with DC if needs be (am planning a home birth). I have also looked at the emergency childcare website and they may be able to send a nanny but i'm not sure how long that would take. Good luck!

problem is unless you DEF know the date you will give birth, then its harder to book an emergancy nanny as you could meet a few, yet when the time comes they may already be babysitting/working/out with friends etc

could a friend or neighbour without their own children or one with a partner be on stand by?

Well looked at emergency childcare...but it said max 2 hours to get a nanny to us...and I would rather my dd knew who was looking after her...but like the doula idea, if I choose to go for homebirth...thanks

Having spoken to DH and told him all your comments he thinks we should try asking our neighbour to stay over, my neighbour and I do chat a lot and I would say she is more than just an aquaintence and neighbour, but its such a big ask. And as she has two big dogs that dd is not keen on will ask friend if she would come and pick up dd (in her ds's carseat) and babysit her for the day. And hope that its a quick birth!

I feel really bad asking someone to get up in the night without huge financial inducement. I would do it for a friend or a close neighbour tho...and me and my neighbour do chat regually...

Thank you all for your help

sure they wont mind getting up in middle of night

and when you feel up to it after birth, then give them a card and a bunch of flowers to say thanks

I have had children of friends turn up at all times of the night and in all states when mum is in labour..one was 3.30am..child was in a babygrow and dad practically threw him at me and said buy anything you need in the morning and we will pay you back.... obv it was unexpected and an emergency for them and we had plenty of stuff to tide us over for the following day and all was fine.

Friends WILL feel honoured if you ask them to help you out rather then put out...just ask!

It might not be a huge ask. As littlestars says, I would be honoured and excited to be asked even by someone who wasn't a "best friend". If I could possibly manage it logistically I would help.

had not really thought of it that way...I would not mind helping someone out who was pg and had a child they trusted me with at such a time...