CM Club - How would you mention this to parent??? (behaviour)

[looneytune]

I've a 20 month old whose behaviour has suddenly changed as of last week. I know it's the usual phase etc but I usually mention to parents so can make sure all happy about how we deal with it. Well one thing she's been doing is pushing people, especially my very small 10 month old mindee who just started walking this week. She's clearly jealous even though being given same level of attention. Thing is I've had her since 8 weeks old so has had odd occasion where she's been clingy to me. She's just started being like that again (not in a non confident way, just when others come for a cuddle or are being praised, she dives at me for a hug so to be centre of attention iyswim).

My ds1 told mum on Monday that mindee was 'naughty' and then said what she did and mum replied 'she wouldn't have done that on purpose, it would have been an accident'. Thing is, she IS doing it on purpose but it's a phase. Mum said she was fine all weekend and doesn't understand, but mindee doesn't have siblings living with her so parents aren't likely to see what I see.

So, how do I mention tonight as I want to make sure they're happy with what I suggest for dealing with it.

TIA

I would just be honest and tell the mum what is happening, so like you said, you are both happy with the way it is being dealt with.

Good luck, these situtions are tricky

I know but how do you handle it if they say that it must have been an accident when it wasn't? She did the same at group today but I wasn't looking after other mindee then, it was her mum who saw her do it.

oh dear... the mum saw it, but still thinks it's an accident

I would mention it, and if the mum still says about it being an accident, you will have to say that you saw what happened and it wasn't.

Like you say, it will be just a phase, as 20 months is still very young, so maybe re-assure the mum with that too.

sorry, mindee pushed the 10 month old mindee who just started walking and it was THAT mum who said something. When i told the 20 month mum on monday, i said it was normal at this age but she said it can't have been on purpose. fingers x'd she'll be ok tonight, we get on VERY well, she's just a bit protective

As a parent I'm worrying about my gigantic for his age 18 month old pushing others around. If he's doing it with CM/other mindees or at groups I'd want to know but wouldn't think it was an accident. If it's something that's happened with previous mindees, if you've found ways of dealing with it and they've worked before, I'd personally want to know and welcome any advice or help you might have. Don't know what you can do if parent in denial though!

elkiedee - thanks for that. She was ok in the end and as I had few examples, took what I was saying as being what happened. I told her it's normal developmental stuff and she'll grow out of it and she agreed with how I planned on dealing with it so we're fine thank god. Think she was just embarrassed and couldn't understand as she doesn't see her with other young ones as I have her full time. Mum agreed that as she's been with me from 8 weeks and used to have one to one care (was paid double), although she's used to the other mindees as had them a while now, it's probably a jealously thing as the 10 month old and 18 month old have both started walking on their own in the last couple of weeks, and of course she's forgotten the fuss she got when she did that! All I can do is ignore the minor negative behaviour, deal with the stuff that needs dealing with and PRAISE, PRAISE, PRAISE the good behaviour and hope she goes back to wanting to please all the time .