CM Club: mindee behaviour troubles

[SammyK]

I have two mindees at the moment.

One is 19m and is throwing, hitting and pushing. Obv this is age related but I literally cannot take my eyes off him for one second or a toy is thrown at whoever is nearest. Usually ds as mindee follows him around. Today he threw a tardis money box full of pennies (ds's favourite object) at ds's forehead.

I do the usual fuss the victim routine but ds is dreading him arriving now.

My other mindee is 8yrs and very very high maintenance. She stands outside the loo while I am in there, costantly wants food or a drink, immediately loses interest in an activity if I am not there interacting continuously, basically just wants constantly. sigh.

Both mindees are like this at home too so not just me! Just don't know what to do. DS is ASD/aspergers and I am tired.

I feel awful typing all this as they are not horrid kids - but I am tired today and looking for any tips or suggestions.

Are they ok went you are out and about?

I love getting out for the day with mindees as I find it much easier, plus you come home to a tidy house.

Well that is another thing.

Mindee aged 8 has just had us all dash back from the pet shop were we were about to do thekids summer animal trail as she needed the loo. She went before we left BTW. I have called her bluff on this before and she has wet herself. On both occasions out less than an hour too. Trouble is don't drive so can't just pop to a loo.

I do try and get out and about and it does help the little mindee.

But big mindee still the same. Wants this object/sweet/drink, "OOoooh look Sammy's ds macdonalds", can I sit upstairs on the bus/right at the back, Is very tiring TBH.

Have discussed this with aunt who mindee lives with and same with everyone.

Oh dear she does sound like hard work, you have my sympathies!

Sorry, have nothing else to suggest.

Can you reward her for playing independently? Aged eight she should NOT be following you to the toilet, and you should insist she waits downstairs. It's rude!

I know she shouldn't c o l d i t z but when they aren't yours you can't tell tem to take a hike!!

My loo is downstairs, she will stand outside chatting to me.

Is also sly with littler kids getting them to wants things / ask for things she wants which upsets them when I say no and irritates me.

Poor you, should be better weather tomorrow so you can get out for a bit.
You say the 8yr old mindee lives with her aunt, does she have any parents?
Only asking, as she sounds like she is very anxious and does not want to leave any carer out of her sight for one second in case they disapear and maybe she does not trust adults enough yet.

Ripeberry - mindee is being fostered by aunt, was taken from family home and has superised contact with mum. She is not a bad girl - she is lovely, so affectionate but just very high needs. Has never had any boundaries, never been taught to socialise, play, maintain friendships, etc.

I feel so sad for her, it must be like entering another world with all these rules we have!

Mindee is here 11 hour days 3 days a week during summer hols - I am worn out!

Only have one mindee (little one) tomoro until lunch, then meeting college assessor, then doing a mystery shop.

Have fun with the mystery shop!