How best to source a nanny that specialises in toddlers - legitimate experiences or specialises in toddlers

[tiredmum20266]

Wondering, How best to search out for a nanny that specialises in toddler behaviour management

LO is by no means terrible. But the early toddler stage has hit in full swing. And I’m out of my depths as a FTM with no partner. And wanting to get this next yr or two of life right for LO to set us both up for a good start in life and ongoing.

I’m seriously out of my depths with managing the emotions of this and would prefer if getting a nanny now onboard. They literally were a specialist in this age bracket. To help me and LO navigate this stage of life in the bestest way possible.

Had a junior nanny previously when LO was younger (and easier, babies are easier compared to this toddler stage which I’m out of my depths and can’t cope). Although that past nanny was as great in how she bonded with LO. She was junior nanny at best/more au pair level in her skill set. And when she retired it came at the right time. As physically (she was older) and just her general skill set wise she wouldn’t have been equipt for toddlers.

Someone mentioned a NQN norland looking for their yr placement role. As they’re trained to deal with all ages of children. But specifically apparently part of their hefty training involves dealing with toddlers, behaviour and emotional regulation etc etc. On top of their other attributes they bring with their training.

But if looking elsewhere whether sourcing an independent nanny or through an agency, how would be best to make sure the candidate is more of a specialist in toddler ages. Simone that that is their speciality I guess.

It would be a live in role candidate would be going for.

Many thanks for Andy tips or advice on this search.

I would look at their education.

Norlands are certainly well trained in earlyyears and in the role of a professionel nanny.

Personally, I would go through an agency for peace of mind, check their references (which, along with their CV will confirm the ages they have experience with).

During the interview, make sure DC is there for at least some of the time so you can see how they interact. And ask them open questions about how they tend to handle boisterous behaviour and toddler tantrums - their answers should reveal how experienced they are and whether they’re the right fit for your family.

I’m not sure if you’ve managed to find someone yet, but I just wanted to reply in case this is still relevant.

Firstly, please be kind to yourself. The early toddler stage can be so intense, especially as a solo parent. What you’re describing is very common, and wanting extra support at this stage is a really thoughtful and proactive decision.

You’re absolutely right that toddlers require a very different skill set to babies. When you’re looking for someone who genuinely understands toddler behaviour and emotional regulation, it’s less about job titles and more about experience and approach.

A few things that tend to help when searching:

Look for nannies who specifically talk about toddler years as their preferred age group, not just “experience with all ages”.

Ask how they handle big emotions, boundaries, transitions and frustration, not just what they’ve done, but what their philosophy is.

Strong candidates will be able to give real examples of supporting toddlers through meltdowns, separation anxiety, testing boundaries, etc.

Someone confident with toddlers should also be comfortable supporting you. Being able to explain what’s developmentally normal and helping you feel less alone in it and give you peace of mind.

Norland training can be helpful for some families, but it isn’t the only route. Plenty of excellent career nannies specialise in the toddler stage without that background. What matters most is temperament, consistency and genuine enjoyment of this age.

Given this is a live-in role and such a crucial developmental stage, taking time to really understand someone’s experience (and having a proper trial) can make a huge difference.