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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Looking to employ live in nanny - though not able to set up a seperate annex (which would be the better option I know all round) & some salary advice

15 replies

anonymous987654 · 28/12/2025 16:56

For context we have had a temp live in nanny in the past this year who was imbetween careers and feel it’s something want to do again for my LO as we are a single parent household and feel LO needs that extra ‘at home/within the home’ person in their life. And I do also if I’m honest, for my sanity.

I tried outside childcare help since we moved to a new area after trying out that said previous live in temp nanny when we lived in our old area.

But have realised due to our small family unit of just LO and I. Have realised LO is regressing just having myself at home as their only caregiver. And I’m struggling to enjoy motherhood and feel I’m drowning with no village so to speak. And so the best solution is to have a live in nanny for LO for the next yr/2yrs or however long is needed to bridge the gap before LO (who’s just reached toddlerhood) will be in school.

Want the best for my LO. And that has clearly shown to be, to have someone else as part of the home environment. Not just in the form of external childcare options. She needs someone more than me at home.

So will be searching for a long term live in type candidate in the New Year (looking independently seems a minefield, so may resort to sourcing the candidate through an agency, still working this part out).

Thing is, in an ideal world, as others in this situation have done, it is no doubt best if the candidate had their own floor of the house, or separate equipped self contained studio or annex.

Unfortunately that’s just not something I can factor into with our new home.
Later on there is potential to build a third floor into the loft (which is huge) to create a nice en-suite large room / studio type layout. But finances won’t allow for that until a good year or few.

So for now, the home layout I have is what I need to make work for us, and a potential live in Nanny.

I’m worried about the impact having a bedroom on the same floor as us, or a non en-suite room, or a room above a living space below. Could have on potential applicants who elsewhere could be offered much more Accomodation / layout wise. But I’ve got to work with what ours is for now.

Is it just best, that I offer the large double room (that has the dressing room area to it, and its own en-suite, all behind one door) (have attached floor plan).. that’s across the top right of the first floor of the house. That’s above the garage (so they wouldn’t be bothered by noise of a child and just family life going on around them) below their room on their non working times and days?
This was scheduled to be my room. But if I had this room for myself. My LO’s room is in effect going to be next to the nanny’s. And the nanny also will only have access to a shared bathroom across the landing. Rather than an en-suite.

I mean I could keep my daughter in my room (we slept in the same room until recently with it just being us/not having a partner). So that’s doable to have LO in my room til she gets older. Resulting in any noise my LO may ever make in the night or on nanny’s days off, is masked by being with me in the right hand side of the top floor layout room.
And the Nanny’s room would be far left double room at the front of the house?

I guess I’m asking, does anyone have or has had a live in nanny where you lived all on the same floor, and couldn’t offer them more?

Also I’m wondering what people would expect to pay for a 40hr a wk live in nanny? Or do pay?
(I know there are huge ends of the spectrum on this subject, but just thinking what I should be looking at for a decent nanny, but let’s say not a nanny that advertises they have worked and work with ‘UHNW / HNW families, and likely not a Norland nanny (not opposed to norland Nannie’s but I think they may not be the best fit for the Accomodation I have to offer. And them having certain expectations).

But I do want to employ a decent nanny.
No throwing too much shade on the temp live in nanny we did have who was great in many ways (for example the great connection she had to my LO. but she was charged and was paid around 500pw net after tax, for 35hrs a wk (her choice of hours per wk). Was live in. Found through an agency. Her nanny tax HMRC, Pention, sick pay, holiday pay, groceries and fuel etc were of course ad on costs.
But although like I said was good in many ways. She lacked in knowledge, updated skill set, and was older and rather less proactive in keeping up with a young child. But she helped during a period we needed help. And was a good introduction into learning about how it can be with a live in nanny, or nanny at all. And what to look for in a long term potential candidate etc

I’m fully aware I should perhaps look to broaden the budget no doubt for our future permanent candidate for a better all round professional nanny. And when agencies have rate categories for diff nanny profiles. I need to go for a higher price bracket of potential candidates to get the positive attributes needed for a growing toddler that needs someone offering a bit more overall.

Many thanks for any advise, I realise that was a lengthy post! X

Looking to employ live in nanny - though not able to set up a seperate annex (which would be the better option I know all round) & some salary advice
OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Rocknrollstar · 28/12/2025 17:35

Be aware that you will be liable for National Insurance, holiday pay and maternity pay should they get pregnant.

anonymous987654 · 28/12/2025 17:48

Rocknrollstar · 28/12/2025 17:35

Be aware that you will be liable for National Insurance, holiday pay and maternity pay should they get pregnant.

Yes, the temp live in nanny we had for nearly 6 months found through an agency we had before was paid all that using Nannytax’s services to help me with that.

She did take the slight micky on sick days but that was just bad luck on that front (she wasn’t the healthiest of eaters/keeping her body in good check/exercise if any at all etc, so her health was suffering due to partially that. (Something I’ll keep in mind for future candidate - someone who lives to be out and about more (especially now my LO is a toddler and needs someone more fit and healthy) and so will ask previous references on any future candidate how they faired with their health/periods of sickness etc

She was beyond child rearing age so to speak, so maternity pay wasn’t a factor. But I’ve had that mentioned to me before, regarding factoring in perhaps what age bracket of candidate I may go for. As maternity pay is a big thing to have to cover I imagine.

Like I said, all this is a bit of a minefield, so still navigating it all.

I’d love to just rely on outside of the home childcare options, but it is just myself that LO has, as our extended family are no longer with us. So I see she really does need more than me at home as part of what she may view as her at home caregivers/at home environment. She is regressing with just me as her sole at home caregiver I’m seeing this, so need to do what’s best. Just need to navigate who and where we source them the best I can to get it all right.

OP posts:
Lullabycrickets23 · 28/12/2025 17:53

I have been a live-in nanny about 12/13 years ago! Just wanted to say, you sound absolutely lovely worrying so much about the potential lady needs!
I wouldn’t worry too much about the room! Many nannies do share a bathroom with the children. If you want to offer the master bedroom, that’s lovely, but I don’t think strictly necessary. Also about the family noise. The nanny should expect to hear noises and children crying or whatever. They know they live in a family home. To be honest, I wouldn’t want a nanny that expects silence and quiet when she’s off. Of course there are boundaries, like no child waking up the nanny on a Sunday morning jumping in her bed. No walking in toilets or ravaging through her stuff. That said, normal family life and playing with other families on weekends is to ve expected. If she doesn’t want to be around she should go to her bedroom or organise some activities elsewhere for herself. I don’t have a guideline on salary as I am out of the market.
It depends a lot on what you need and expect from her. Do you need her to be qualified? How many years of experience? Your area also has a huge impact on salary expectations. Live-in nannies tend to earn slightly less than live-out, as they don’t have to factor in rent and food and bills. I know the ongoing asking for live out nannies in London at the moment is 18/20£ ph gross. However, it really depends on experience and area mostly and if they hold qualifications.

Allaboutthecats · 28/12/2025 17:54

Your house looks a decent size so am sure will be OK. My friends' live in nanny had a unsuited bedroom.but no private living space.
Could you remove some of the wardrobes and turn the dressing room into a snug?

Lullabycrickets23 · 28/12/2025 17:57

Regarding Maternity Pay, the government covers it. You pay the nanny and the government gives the money back to you, so there is nothing to cover out of pocket, unless you offer in a contract anything different from Statutory maternity pay.

Autumvibes · 28/12/2025 18:05

Does it need to be live in? Depends where you live but live in I would budget for 3k a month, more if south east.

A room is really all you need.

Autumvibes · 28/12/2025 18:05

Lullabycrickets23 · 28/12/2025 17:57

Regarding Maternity Pay, the government covers it. You pay the nanny and the government gives the money back to you, so there is nothing to cover out of pocket, unless you offer in a contract anything different from Statutory maternity pay.

Yes but it does take rather a long time to be reimbursed.

Allaboutthecats · 28/12/2025 18:09

Allaboutthecats · 28/12/2025 17:54

Your house looks a decent size so am sure will be OK. My friends' live in nanny had a unsuited bedroom.but no private living space.
Could you remove some of the wardrobes and turn the dressing room into a snug?

Ensuite not unsuited!

Dencar · 31/12/2025 16:45

You have a lovely spacious home. As you have a downstairs powder room, convert your reception room to a bedroom for the nanny. She won’t need to go upstairs during the night to use the loo.
That provides the evening privacy for all of you. The shared bathroom is available to her when needed.
i think that would work perfectly for a live in nanny position.
Having worked as a live in na nay for many years I would have lived that arrangement.

Hiptothisjive · 31/12/2025 16:54

Autumvibes · 28/12/2025 18:05

Does it need to be live in? Depends where you live but live in I would budget for 3k a month, more if south east.

A room is really all you need.

Agreed. Ours was a few miles away and this was convenient and she wasn’t on top of us so to speak.

Depends where you live but I would factor 30k and that is from your gross salary. I don’t know your situation but an au pair is an option too.

Nanny tax is good and easy to use but claiming back money from the government for sickness can take months . Also you will have to include your nanny in your taxes.

Also be mindful just because they live in doesn't mean they can work 60 hours per week and just be there when you want to nip out. Employing someone directly means the can’t work longer than prescribed hours unless they choose to.

Devoed · 31/12/2025 17:12

My mum was a nanny many moons ago.

She appreciated her own bathroom, bedroom and snug. She also made sure she had a kettle, small fridge and toaster/microwave in the snug so she could get breakfast, etc without being accosted by the children.

The parents she nannied for weren’t great with boundaries so she used to have DC banging on the door asking for her a lot.

anonymous987654 · 31/12/2025 18:15

Devoed · 31/12/2025 17:12

My mum was a nanny many moons ago.

She appreciated her own bathroom, bedroom and snug. She also made sure she had a kettle, small fridge and toaster/microwave in the snug so she could get breakfast, etc without being accosted by the children.

The parents she nannied for weren’t great with boundaries so she used to have DC banging on the door asking for her a lot.

Oh no, yep my LO knows not to do that. From our one past experience of the live in candidate at our old place. She knew not to ever disturb like that.

Just wish with new property could offer some sort of self contained self sufficient studio or annex but the property layout and planning permission wouldn’t allow to build out like that. But I’m hoping I can get the funds together to build into the loft later next year and create that type of upper floor en-suite studio type room totally separate space layout.

Will provide little fridge, kettle, microwave etc for them, as think that’s always good. But will see how it goes with them having just one of the double rooms to start maybe, rather than forfeiting the large en-suite double room on the top floor right hand side of floor plan I attached to the post. As like I mentioned I will likely have my daughter in there with me for the next however long.

Luckily the property has nice setting of having a half acre paddock through a gate from the garden. And then farmers fields all behind around there behind the house. So I’m hoping if find right candidate they might be an outdoorsy person and appreciate the outdoors aspects to the house and surroundings. And later I can put money to build into the loft to make a better living space for them that gives both them and us (myself and daughter) a bit more of separation and privacy.

OP posts:
Devoed · 31/12/2025 18:28

@anonymous987654
Personally, I would give them the master suite. It has loads of storage for their things, and the bedroom looks big enough for a bit of a studio living with a sofa, etc.

anonymous987654 · 31/12/2025 19:07

Devoed · 31/12/2025 18:28

@anonymous987654
Personally, I would give them the master suite. It has loads of storage for their things, and the bedroom looks big enough for a bit of a studio living with a sofa, etc.

I do see what you’re saying. I’ll have a think on it. Thanks for your input

OP posts:
Devoed · 31/12/2025 19:08

@anonymous987654
just to add that it will give you more privacy too.

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