Our nanny is 48. She is from Estonia, and has two grown daughters of her own. One of them has a son, so she is even a grandmother. She fits in pretty well. But, to be honest she pretty much keeps to herself. When I get home from work she goes to her room immediately. I used to wonder if this was a sign that she was unhappy. But, it may just be that her day is long and tiring so when I get home, she runs for cover. Or, it may be that she regards herself as the hired help and think her place is in her room. I have tried to wlecome her and explain that she need not dpart the living room just because I am home. But, then, perhaps she is more comgfortable in her own space where she can unwind at the end of the day. Anyway, we get along fine.
It is just pure luck that she is actually quite the nutrition freak -- oh joy! So, I don't need to worry much about what DD eats (and if it were up to dd she would refuse all meals in favour of milk and cookies) So this is a wonderful trait of a nanny. Although, I dod suspect that in my absense, the Nanny may give in to demand more easily than I would. For example, if dd demand cheerios for dinner, and I am offering pasta with veg and meat, then too bad. If she protests, I just let her down and she goes without. But, for the most part Heidi certainly shines on the food front when it comes to leading by example.
The problem I expect you will face is that you want someone for what really amounts to very few hours. My nanny works 60 hours a week, plus miscellaneous babysitting. I don't pay her a great deal (at least not according to the critical mumsnet brigade). But, with the amount of hours she works she makes enough to live on.
I wonder if the ideal person for you might be someone who is a bit older but wants to persue some other activity, such as studying in her spare time.
Also, I know that this is a bit controversial, but I do think it's valuable to jusge the liklihood of getting along with someone based on their culture. And, from what I know, I would recommend Estonians. The person for whom my nanny worked before me was actually a young English couple who were living in Estonia. When I spoke to her (for a reference) she told me that she had had sever Estonian employees and they all were very good and hard working. She believed it was an Estonian trait. So, you may wish to try Estonia as a good sourse.
There is, however, one draw back to an older nany who has raised a family already. And, that is that she is bound to have definite views on various subjects which might not be the same as yours. For example, my nanny is very keen on all things natural. Camomile tea for sticky eye, "Vodka socks" for a fever, and so on. I, however, believe firmly in modern medicine and my children WILL be give paracetemol if their feven goes above 38.0. I have to be rather firm in ensuring that she give the medicine sometimes.
Oh, I've rambled on and on... Hope I haven't said too much. I previously had a young au pair from Polans, and she was a big mistake. If you want to know more, CAT me and I'll have lots more to say.
Good luck... Uwila