I have rather interesting requirements for maternity nurses . References and experience are a must, not minding a manic household is also important. My husband is blind so we do have additional requirements and the maternity nurse needs to be sensitive to that. I need them to do their job without too much intrusion, in a professional way and as long as they do that I don't give a monkeys.
Having had four different maternity nurses I'd say that qualifications are not a factor at all but personality is. The first one I had had a list of qualifications the length of her arm and thought she knew everything. She lasted two weeks before my husband got so fed up with her bossing us around that he termintated her contract. She was qualified and experience but the personality was a bad fit. It cost us nearly a grand but it was worth it. The second was a hurried replacement (C-section with twins, no family, we were desperate) and yes, I'll be honest, she was young and it has coloured my experience. I won't employ a youngster again for love nor money. It wasn't so much that she didn't know what she was talking about, she did, but she was so immature and it did my head in.
The third was when I had the next one and she was the best. She had no qualifications but her own children, which is the best qualification in my book, and lots of experience! It was more a pre-emptive measure because I wanted a VBAC and wasn't sure whether I was going to get one. I did in the end so the maternity nurse ended up being an extra pair of hands, at times slightly redundant, because I was coping fine. She knitted a lot, which was lovely, helped me organise the christening, left us with a freezer full of lovely home cooked meals.
Sadly she wasn't available for the next one and I really wish she had been because it was a very complicated pregnancy and the interviewing process wiped me out. The fourth was a very sensible, middle-aged lady, who got us through a very difficult time but she wasn't as motherly as the previous one. Again a mother, that went on my list of requirements, and experienced. She was qualified but the contrast with the previous two qualified ones was incredible.
I think I now prefer my maternity nurse to have had a child so she at least has some sympathy with hormonal horrors and worry. The two good ones were mothers, the best was a grandmother. Having said that it may have just been their personalities that were better, or having life-experience. I found the first two quite insensitive to some things, especially my floods of tears. From my experience age has become a huge issue for me, but it might not be for everyone. Qualifications I don't care but the personality really has to be right. Warm, caring and motherly if I have to describe it in three words!
For me, at least, my maternity nurse needed to be both a professional baby-carer and a support to me because while my husband can be a huge emotional support, being blind means he can't do as much as far as practical care goes.
Nannynick - why is/was gender an issue for you? Am I being dense?
I live in Edinburgh, by the way. Was there a particular reason for the Scottish angle?