Nannies, parents with nannies - do you/they ever put your children to bed?

[snickersnack]

We have a nanny, she is delightful and the children (3 and nearly 1) adore her. She's been with us since January and I have absolutely no hesitation leaving them with her...she babysits, but we've got into a situation where I dash home from work, put them to bed then dash out again. She's said she'd be very happy to do the bedtime routine, and I don't think the children would mind - in fact the oldest one would probably think it was a bit of a treat. So really, it's just me thinking that it's a big ask of someone (though they are pretty good at going to bed generally)/worrying the kids might freak out/feeling like a slack mother.

So, nannies - do you mind (really mind) being asked to do this? Parents - do you ask your nannies to do this?

I used to do this for my ex bosses every Thursday as this enabled them to go out for a meal after work without having to come back first....To be honest i actually really enjoyed this as it made our day (especially in the summer) rush free and much smoother! On occasion parents did come back and do bedtime routine somehow it interupted the children (although they were older than yours at nearly 3 and 6) So i would say why now-i honestly enjoyed it....
I left there when i was pregnant with my first child and sadly didn't return with him but wished i could have

If a straw poll helps you at all, all of our full-time nannies' babysitting has been "straight through" - ie, no break from starting in the morning to finishing the babysitting stint at night. We never broke in to do bedtime ourselves.

Doing it that way was so completely taken for granted by our nannies (one or two of whom would definitely have "said something" if it wasn't OK) that I think it must be the norm. In fact, the longest-term, and most firmly principled (but we love her ) of our nannies would have thought us coming in to do bedtime was an unnecessary and possibly destabilising break in her very steady, tranquil and well-adjusted routine.

Seems like our long-term nanny would agree with kkey21.

Sorry - meant to also say - the issue might be different with a part-time nanny - eg a morning one, who wouldn't normally be doing bedtime. But our experience is even that babysitters coming in just for the evening will cheerfully do bedtime if asked.

As a full time live in nanny I used to get the children up in the morning and have them through to bed time or until later on nights I was babysitting. So Mon-Fri I used to put them to bed.

In other live out jobs I have always put the children to bed when I was babysitting and tbh would have found it disruptive of the parents had come home in the middle of it. Many of the nannies I know put the children to bed when babysitting so pretty sure it is the norm

Daisy

I'm also a full time nanny, and I always put the children to bed. Even on occasion when their Mum comes home early, she comes and says hello/goodnight to them while they're in the bath, then leaves me to do the rest of their bedtime routine

As a babysitter, I often put children to bed. As a nanny, I have on rare occasions done overtime at work and thus have bathed and put children to bed.

Our nanny doesn't go until DS is in bed and at least settled, if not asleep, which is always by 7pm. If i can get home from work early and do the bedtime routine, i do, but I don't take over unless there's enough "run in" time or it just disrupts the routine. I think it's absolutely fine to agree this with your nanny, if she's happy with it too.

if the children are happy with the nanny, then they shouldnt have a problem with her putting them to bed - just make sure you tell the children that morning that you are going out and xxx is looking after them/bathing and putting to bed

if i bs then i will put my charges to bed- seems a bit pointless you rushing home to put to bed imo - course you are not being a slack mummy, and tbh if the nanny did object, then i would seriously consider getting rid of her

go out and have a whole evening out and relaz

sprogger - it isn't at all unusual for a nanny's ordinary (non-babysitting) days to stop before actual bedtime - in fact I'd say that that was nannying norm, if there is one.

We found (after running a few variables) the best of all worlds with babies/toddlers was having nanny's hours end with bathtime, so parents get a clean cosy pjyama'd child just ready for stories.

i think most nannies would find this normal,when i was a nanny i put the kids to bed before i finished work most of the time and i lived in when parents on holiday and had kids 24 hrs kids thought it was a treat,i wasnt as strict as parents so it was hols for kids too they got lots of treats too!!!!

This is definitely OK.

My stepsons' nanny and the babysitters I use for our daughter all do bedtime with no qualms.

silvermum - i find it sad that you dont normally put your child to bed and that the nanny does.

I understand that some parents work long hours and dont want to disrupt the childs routine, but isnt it possible to come home 15mins earlier or put your child to bed at 7.15 instead of 7?

Maybe the nanny can bath them, and all be ready for you to walk in, read a story and put them to bed?

My MB likes to bath her children,as it gives her some time to chat about their day etc, then she puts them to bed but if she on the later train, then I wil bath them, so when she is in,she can sort out bedtime/story etc

lauramd - why doesnt the mum finish off bath time, or even let you do it, and then she can read story to them - what is the point of coming home early, if not to spend time with their child?

We have a live out nanny and generally one of us puts the children to bed. Our nanny also babysits sometimes and on the babysitting days she does it.

Walking in halfway through bedtime is disrupting though - if one of us is half an hour late, the children perk up in excitement when we get home and it then takes longer to get them to sleep than if the bedtime boss had carried on single-handed.

I think different things work for different families. This is supposed to be one of the great advantages of nannies; the family can arrange for the children to be brought up the way they want. Silvermum, you should ignore posts that suggest you are doing something wrong. I understand exactly what you are saying.