Is a Norland nanny worth it?

[Internationalpony]

Hi all,

We’re looking at getting a nanny and I love the idea of a Norland nanny for the following reasons:

1. They’re people who have truly chosen nannying as a vocation and haven’t just drifted into it
2. After a three year degree they’ll have a real in depth knowledge of child development so will be actively developing DC not just looking after them
3. They develop a weekly meal plan and activity plan - I’d find this so reassuring and beneficial
4. It seems like they’d do things to make our lives easier in so many other ways e.g. responsible for keeping the nursery tidy, DC laundry, will even meal prep for DC for the weekend
5. There are a clear set of expectations set out by Norland on what the nanny does and doesn’t do which can help to avoid any potential problems further down the line

However they’re of course very expensive, even for a newly qualified one, and we’d only consider a live out arrangement.

Obviously affordability is very personal but my question is, how easy is it to find other nannies who are just as good and proactively focus on child development? Are most other nannies happy to / expect to do similar duties? Where else have people found good nannies?

Finally, we have recently relocated to Northern England which another reason I’m concerned about finding a good nanny - there is so much more choice in London! Would any Norland nanny want to or be willing to be based here? Has anyone had a Norland nanny in the North before?

Thanks in advance!

there you go

thenorthernnannyagency.com

Amazing, isn't it?

I seriously wonder why some people even bother to have children tbh! What's the point in having a child and getting someone else to do all the work?

Salaried employees have varied benefits - maternity leave does tend to be shorter, but it is sometimes paid (and if not, it can be affordable if you've been able to set money aside from your higher salary) and holidays can be pretty decent. A lot depends on who you work for. Hourly employees tend not to get much paid time off, and mat leave is short and unpaid, though there are parts of the country where hourly workers' rights are being championed.

Most children go to a nursery or childminder, which is vociferously defended on here. To criticise a mother for using a nanny is a bit hypocritical.

Ooooh, is “mithering” a proper northern word!?

I use this word to my kids (“Stop the mithering, please! I’m sick of hearing it!) and it’s true I am from Sheffield. I just assumed it was a universal word.

Must make a personal note and remember to use the word much more frequently in future.

We use "moidering", but I grew up t'other side of The Pennines.

When I was offered an amazing role in the UK the only childcare that works is a nanny and I would absolutely hire a norland nanny, however my reason for doing so is because of having the agency there to help find someone who has special needs experience.

I have three children, two with autism and a third with dyslexia. All 3 have ADD. I need someone experienced who can handle more difficult children who need an instruction repeated at least 5 times, if they don’t want to do the instruction you are looking at 15-20 times. It’s incredibly frustrating and someone not well trained will lose their temper. This is why I prefer to have two nanny’s when I’m not there. There are times you need to step away to collect yourself otherwise the stress is too much.

I can’t do my job if I don’t have good childcare and yes spending £60k a year on a well trained and experienced nanny is absolutely the best option for childcare. I normally have two working when I’m not available during non school hours. It’s shocking to me that we as woman fight each other on these things when what we should be doing is fighting for all childcare and housekeeper costs to be deducted from gross household income. A mother who has chosen to stay home to raise their child will need childcare to attend doctor appointments, if they are sick and I believe things like soft play, which is important socialization for toddlers, should be considered a childcare expense and deducted from taxable household income.

In the long run it always pays off to have the best possible childcare and education. I’m a single parent with minimal financial support from the children’s father. I get no alimony or child support. He is supposed to pay 50% of child related costs. He doesn’t. My current childcare set up is not optimal and in September it will change.

Some mothers choose to work, some choose not to. We need to support both options.

There are lots of great nannies, there are also lots of people who call themselves nannies and might be students or have limited knowledge of child development and ultimately do the same job as a babysitter but during the daytime

You seem to be very fixated on child development. That’s fine but how essential is this expertise? Typically, parents are not experts in child development, yet how does this disadvantage children? I didn’t really have a knowledge of child development, apart from what would be obvious to any layperson, when I had my kids and neither did anyone I knew with kids then or now. They have all seemed to grow up normally or any developmental concerns were flagged by HV’s (using checklists), nursery staff in the preschool/school readiness setting, and school teachers in early years. It’s not as though parents need to undertake quals in child development which needs to then be taken over by someone else with quals in the absence of that parent when they are taking over care of children instead.

A few things OP:

1. can you afford the nanny once her salary jumps after a year? If not, I'd avoid - if you've got a good nanny you'll want to keep her for a few years rather than the disruption and upset to your child of changing
2. it's a very personal hire so I'd interview some from Norland and some from local agencies. You'll know when you meet the right one
3. I'd focus on the quality of the bond they form with your child more than the quality of the meal planning personally - I'm not saying feed your child junk obviously, but I am saying that a loving bond with your child doesn't get learned at university

Are you getting paid for saying Norland Nanny as many times as possible OP? Look after your children yourself ffs, you’re moving to the north, all your airs and graces stand for nowt now,

Yes, I'm aware of what she wrote. Bears no correlation to the stupid responses.

yes I chatted to someone here in the US and his husband will make 250 k as a nurse practitioner- highly specialized so many years of extra training and a masters but yes $250k.Every year so a little less than a doctor.

Why are nurses so low paid in the UK? It is unacceptable.Their job is so high stress. Nannies I know here make $70-80k so 40 k starting sounds right for the UK- it's the nurses who are getting underpaid.

We have had two Norland Nannies as part of their course placement scheme for 6 weeks each. Their knowledge and ability to get stuck in from the beginning is astonishing. The professionalism they show in setting boundaries from the beginning, their attitude etc makes the Norland reputation we know. Their care of the children and knowledge of child development is excellent having been on nursery placements as well as live in etc and not all classroom based learning.

Of course you will find non-Norlands with the same knowledge etc but those will be in high demand and not every one will have those skills whilst you know the Norland’s will.

We had one baby with horrific reflux and an intolerance and they took it in their stride and were a wonderful asset to the family.

Plus it is wonderful to have the freezer stocked with food, especially during the weaning stages when you don’t feel you have time to think between naps, food and other tasks!

Slow hand clap for Crackling, who has put the boot into another woman for making different childcare choices to her, and (horror) for asking an entirely sensible question about the availability of nannies trained in Bath who will have exciting international travel opportunities, in an area of the UK several hundred miles away from Bath.

So you believe all women should be stay at home mothers? I strongly disagree and intend to continue with my career. I don’t think believing women should have access to childcare is having “airs and graces”. After weighing up childcare options we believe a nanny will be a better option for our child than nursery. I’m not sure why that annoys you so much?

That’s the salary of one subset on nannies who are particularly highly qualified and trained at an elite college so I’m not sure you can compare it.

I agree that nurses are underpaid but the average salary in the US is $77k vs £41k in the UK. Salaries in the US are much higher across almost every field. Doctors in the UK aren’t paid anything close to £250k either.

I've found that people with no real career, or anything else about them than having a child, have to validate themselves that way.

I worked part time, some of the time. And had nannies. It's what worked for us. I'm not "better" for it. Neither could I "not be arsed" to look after my children. It was brilliant for us and that's all that matters. When we couldn't find a decent replacement in later years, it worked fine for us too.

It's usually the people who can't afford a nanny who are the most adamant and vocal that a good mother doesn't have one. They have to push this narrative that they are making the best choice, as opposed to admit they don't have any choice.

There are people who can afford nannies who choose not to have them. They aren't the people pretending it makes them a better mother.

So do kids oop north still lose fingers in the looms while their parents work?

I have cousins who live near Leeds and I could have sworn the mum mentioned using a nursery rather than taking her toddler along on her rounds with her (she's a hospital doctor), but maybe I was mistaken. Maybe she's not actually a doctor after all - imagine a woman doctor! Ridiculous notion!

Honestly, if we could've afforded it we'd have hired a Norland nanny - they're bloody amazing! Sadly we couldn't afford it, but you should definitely look into it if you can.

Ignore all the snide remarks, MN is a real cesspit sometimes.

Oh, and I'm a proud Northerner, living Oop North. There are even Northern Norland nannies!

If you can easily afford it, I'd go for it OP.

Absolutely not. Northerners are proud to be so and will defend the stupid, untrue and pathetic crap that is said about the place and its people against posters who are just being sheep. It's interesting how there's always more Southerners spouting crap about Northerners than the other way around. Probably because Northerners are friendly and don't feel the need to put others down to feel better about themselves. We have plenty of sheep. We don't need to act like one.

Surely the worry the OP was expressing about the North (which would also apply to Scotland, Wales, the South-West or most places in the country that are not London or the South-East) is that there might generally a bit less choice in terms of Norland nannies in particular because a lot of nannies, especially non-English ones, do want to be in or near London. And a lot of rich, international families (the sort who hire Norland nannies) are based there. I don't know why people are being so obtuse about this, unless it's because 'bash the OP' is much more fun than engaging with the OP's actual post.

Did you write that because you're northern and therefore superior to the OP, or are you just being rude?
I can't work it out.

OP hasn't denigrated 'The North' in any way. She just asked some questions, having moved to a part of the country that she's not yet familiar with.
It's embarrassing to read some of the responses.

I’m sorry but this is rubbish. There’s a lot of things I enjoy doing with/for DS, and other things that are just chores. I’d be quite happy to have someone else prep (and even cook, shock horror!) our meals, it would actually mean more time to spend helping DS with homework or reading with him or playing with him or chatting with him.

FWIW, I can see that the OP has raised hackles by suggesting she might find it harder to find the kind of nanny she wants in the north.

I'm from the north originally and always enjoy my visits back. However, regional inequalities are a really serious issue in the UK. Internal transportation and international travel links in most of the north are far less good than in the SE. The OP is not being daft by suggesting that she might find fewer Norland trained nannies in a northern city. Some nannies may be reluctant to move if their friends and families are all in the SE.