Should I still pay my 1-day-a-week nanny if we're away?

[piggysgal]

Hi there

I am lucky enough to have a great nanny who has worked for me one day a week for about the last three months. She was my night nanny several nights a week when my six month old dd was a newborn, as I had a lot of trouble breastfeeding and ended up pumping for three months. We get on well and, as she prefers to do nanny shares rather than work five days a week for the same family, she and I agreed that she would come to me once a week to give me a bit of a break. Our arrangement is pretty casual. There is nothing in writing, we simply agreed that she would look after my daughter for the one day a week for about three months, then review the situation after that. The three months are now almost up. She and I would both like her to continue. We need to talk about it, but we are both thinking in terms of another four months. I'd be unwilling to commit beyond that anyway, as who knows what might happen, and my childcare arrangements might need to change.

The question I have is, what do I do about her paying her when I am away on holiday/out of the city, as will definitely happen over the next few months? I am likely to be away for even as much as four weeks during this time. And also, I am very likely to be undergoing a course of fertility treatment over the next four months. This would mean going into the clinic every day for about two to three weeks. The idea of dragging dd into the centre of the city and out again brings me out in a cold sweat, so I would probably hire a temporary nanny over this period so that dd can stay at home while I go in for scans etc. Again, what would I do about paying my current one day a week nanny?

I am hoping there are some knowledgeable people out there who can help me with this. As I say, I really like her, but I'm not sure what the form is. Should I pay her for all the days I can't use her, bearing in mind the casualness of our arrangement, and in the anticipation that she can get agency work for those days? For half the days? None of the days? I'm keen for us to have a good ongoing relationship as she is great with my dd, and who knows what the future holds. I'm sure I'll be looking to use her for babysitting if nothing else, as we have no family nearby who can help.

Thanks for any replies.

No direct experience but..
have a childminder 2 mornings a week and I pay her whenever ds doesn't go there as a result of illness or holiday.
If she cannot look after him (if her ds is sick for example), then I don't pay.
I wanted to pay her while she goes on holiday, but she refused. I pay her when I go on holiday though.
She is a good friend though, and these were just the rules we made up together.

You have a verbal agreement, so that stands for now... though you say that you are going to review it. So under the current agreement, I feel you need to pay. But nothing to stop you from reviewing the current agreement and agreeing something else.
By paying regardless of her actually working, you are holding the childcare place open, so she is unlikely to seek other work on that day.

Yes. It's your decision not to send your DS, so you pay.

It seems to me it is a casual arrangement and there is no contract so imo you shouldnt need to pay her when you are away.

IT might be a good idea to sit down with her and say that you are going to need extra help - maybe your one day nanny could do extra days (or she is working 4days elsewhere?) and go from there - it seems a bit pointless paying her as well as a temp nanny.

I try to go by the rule "do unto others as you would have done to you" in such situations.

That should answer your question.

I think you would have to pay her, unless you agree otherwise. It would, presumably, be quite difficut for her to 'sell' that day if you decide you're going to be away.

Okay, I think that clinches it! Thanks, wise mumsnetters! An answer to my question within an hour must be a record! I'll carry on paying her even when I can't use her. Have no problem in doing this, as she's great, and I don't want to lose her. I think, if I'm clearly going to be using childcare services more often as my dd gets older, I'm going to need to read up on this sort of thing a lot more. Anyone got any good suggestions about guides out there to employing nannies?

Cheers everyone.

Good lord, three exclamation marks in one post. Eeek. Sorry folks, I'm not usually an exclamation-mark-abuser. Just got a bit over-excited about everyone replying to my post I think.

There is a MNetter called Eleusius who has posted extensively here. I would suggest you have a look at her threads.

Ah, by the way, I think you should pay her.

Good luck!

if you are happy to pay her then great - im sure the nanny will be happy and appreicate it.

hope all goes well with your fertility treatments

Best to just ask on here for advice regarding employing nannies. Don't think a 'guide' as such exists, there are few books around, though many are quite old... and things like legislation can change quite a bit over time.

Talking of which, I would point out to you that you should really have a written agreement in place by now, if you are deemed to be the employer. Good starting place is the ACAS website, which has lots of information for employers. That particular link will take you to details of how to produce a Written Statement (which needs to be produced within two months of the person starting their employment).

You should pay her - it is only morally right.

What you could do as well is to mention that you arene't going to be around on 'x' date and would she mind maybe doing an extra day instead on 'y' date? That's a middle gorund that will leave you both happy if she says yes (and at the least will leave you on the moral high ground if she says no)...

Thanks again everyone, and thanks nannynick for that link. We really should have a written contract by now, you're quite right. And I really need to start checking up on things like my responsibilities as far as tax and national insurance are concerned. She just pays them herself. I've been far too lax, just wanting not to be bothered with it all as it's only one day a week.

Just a quick reply in agreement. I employed a full time nneb nanny up till recently as it was cheaper with 3 kids that way - good nanny's are hard to find so you don't want to upset her. Now that I don't have a nanny she still sees us and baby sits at the drop of a hat, what goes around comes around -hope this helps
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