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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

Help!! 11year old playing out while siblings at mindees.

18 replies

Earthymama · 02/04/2008 07:24

Just found out that 11 year old boy I look after twice a week for full days during hols and after school is bringing his mobile and his parents want him to be able to go to local park with his friends unsupervised.

That's fine when his parents are in charge of him but how do I stand? I got up early to devise a permission/disclaimer form for them to sign and have got in a panic!!

He's a capable lad, and would be fine but what's my position?

An dreading having to say no, and having stroppy 11 year old all day!!

Please advise me!!

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Original poster

Earthymama · 02/04/2008 07:34

bump....though I know you are all busy

OP posts:

crace · 02/04/2008 07:36

Earthymama- I actually don't know where you stand on this one. I am hoping the others will be along to advise.

moreJellothanJlo · 02/04/2008 07:46

don't think I'd be happy about this, I'd spend the time knowing i'm responsible for him but not knowing what he's up to/who he's with

Maidamess · 02/04/2008 07:49

I think it would be okay.... if he's got a mobile and he promises to call you if they go anywhere else.. I'm not a childminder or a nanny, but am the mother of a recently turned 12 year old, and this is ALL they want to do. I think it could work if you put some time restraints on him, or even take the other kids to the same park if thats possible?

shoshe · 02/04/2008 07:53

Dont think you are covered by insurance to be honest.

Not sure tho, and I must say, I was in the same postion a couple of yeasr ago, and decided in the end NOT to let the child go out.

Not just in case anything happened to him, but also because I had 6 other children under 8, and felt that if anything happened to one of them and I had to go to a hospital or anything, would then have to get the older one back to me quickly, and it wasnt practical.

and who is to say that wherever the 11 year old is they will have a signal? or be where they say they are.

What if you want to go out somewhere, I know we go out everyday, is the 11 year old going to want to stay behind?

I would stick with, thet NO, only supervised.

saltire · 02/04/2008 07:54

I had this with a child . I got parents to sign a permission slip. On it i included things like the mindee must not go into other people's houses. he must come back every 15/30 minutes to let me know he is ok.

MaureenMLove · 02/04/2008 08:21

Instead of being the big bad wolf (that the 11 year old will no doubt think you are!) why don't you suggest that for the time he wants to spend out with his mate, he is th responsiblity of his mates parents, iyswim.

So, it'll take some working out on his part, but he could arrange to go out on Tuesday morning, Wednesday afternoon an all day Thursday or whatever and be answerable to someone else, not you.

I don't think that's an unreasonable suggestion to make to the parents. Tell them the legal and insurance problems, not to mention the logistics of having various other mindees. They will have to face facts that if they use a cm, things aren't going to be that easy.

ayla99 · 02/04/2008 08:41

I would not agree to this at all. My understanding is that your public liability insurance would not be valid as the insurance provider would not view the child as being in your care/supervision under these circumstances.

Although an over-eight is not included in the compulsory Ofsted registration, Ofsted have told me that regardless of age, ALL children must be within sight and sound of the childminder at all times. Its impossible to ensure the safety of a child you cannot see or hear.

I've looked after children up to age 12, so far. Families know that if they book me their child will have to stay with me. If they want to play out with their mates they have to arrange that for weekends or other days they are not with me (or after they have been collected from my house). We don't stay indoors all the time, we do go out to park etc in which case they can play a bit of football with their friends where I can see them next to the kiddies park where I supervise the littlies on the swings etc. Thats as much freedom as they get with me, I'm afraid.

I do think that its important to encourage independance and a child of this age should have time with their mates. But should be done outside of childminding hours IMO

dmo · 02/04/2008 09:26

i had a disclaimer from parents for a 9yr olsd to play on my front
OFSTED were not happy at my inspection with it and said the children should be within hearing/sight at all times
i got marked down for saftey

KaySamuels · 02/04/2008 09:33

I would say no too.

Explain it to the parents, there are just too many problems with it, you don't just have him to think about. I say no to this every week, would rather have half an hours sulking than all the hassle and worry.

Ofsted say mindees in sight and or hearing at all times I believe....

Original poster

Earthymama · 02/04/2008 09:35

Parents have insisted, signed a disclaimer will tell all later

OP posts:

imananny · 02/04/2008 09:40

As a nanny I would have to say no to allowing this, as if something happened to the 11yr while under your care, you would never forgive yourself - plus would your insurance be validated?

My friend looked after a 11yr and 2 younger siblings (3days) and MB was happy for him to walk home from school, play in park alone,cycle with friends on her days and was happy for my friend to do the same, but my friend said no - hence a stroppy 11yr but a safe one

I reliese CM have different insurances from a nanny but not sure if you would be covered - myabe a letter from parents would help

imananny · 02/04/2008 09:41

you typed your reply while i was replying

will pop in later for a read on here x

Stars22 · 02/04/2008 18:32

Sorry not sure about how childminders insurance and things work but as a nanny i let my 10 year old charge play out where i cant see her, she isnt allowed out if her friends arn't out, she knows where she is and isnt allowed to go and has a mobile, i think it also depends on the child and the area that they want to go out and play in iykwim.

BradfordMum · 02/04/2008 18:51

Imagine the headlines - Child goes missing/is injured while in Childminders care.

The papers would have a field day, and once again, childminders will be all tarred with the same brush.

Not a cat in hells chance as far as I'm concerned.

ThePrisoner · 02/04/2008 19:21

Regardless of whether Ofsted would allow this or if we are covered by insurance, it is something I certainly wouldn't allow.

It is something that has cropped up in previous years with me and older mindees - parents have totally accepted that I do not want the responsibility for a child who is not physically in my care.

As shoshe has already said, it would be a nightmare if I had to rush out to get the child in an emergency. Can you imagine getting all the other mindees dressed with shoes and coats, and be suitably equipped with buggies or reins??

ROSEgarden · 02/04/2008 19:56

make sure you get her to sign something that says she INSISTS her child be able to leave your house to play out, put that at these times both you and the child (if hes old enough to go out on own, hes old enough to sign a record to say hes left your care)will sign a record to show when he is and isnt in your care(when he leaves and when he comes back), put that this child will NOT be coverd by your insurance at anytime whilst not with you and that you have advised against it in the interest of his safety but this suggestion has been declined, get her to sign and i would also send a copy to ofsted explaining what has happend

Original poster

Earthymama · 03/04/2008 10:19

They have insisted, though luckily we were busy and it didn't happen yesterday...I had other committments last night so couldn't address this and it won't happen again til next hols so will take on board all your advise and contact NCMA etc.

Thank you all, it's good to know your instincts are right. When the weather is great it's not a problem, we all go to the park.

when it's cloudy and chilly it's fine for football players but harder on littler ones.
Today it's great!!

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