Two Settings

[Vimto1991]

Hi everyone, currently I work the two days my DH has off work, we have no time off together to do things as a family with our DD(20m), and struggle to even do basic chores around taking care of DD and work.
we decided to put our DD into a private nursery and they only could give us one full day and one half day starting in May. That’s fine, I can still work two days and then we’d get a day off together, and I can even work a bonus half day on her PM session.

i do really like that private nursery, but the school I hope she one day goes to has just called to say we have a place in their 2-3 room starting September. I’d love to put her in this for my work hours, but it’s term based and I need to work 52 weeks of the year. So I’m considering sending her for a morning just so she’s in the door to get used to the school as hope she can go to pre school there and hopefully get in to school there, too (not our catchment but 0.4 miles away so close).

they only offer min 2 sessions, so do you think it’ll be too much for my DD who will be just over 2 when she goes?

week would look like this:
two mornings in school nursery
followed by one full day in private
day off together with me and DH
PM session in private nursery

I don’t HAVE to put her in the school one, I just have a gut feeling it’s really nice and will get her used to the school? I also then get a morning to do chores, shopping, etc, as would DH on his day off.

any thoughts on if this is a stupid plan for a toddler - maybe I should just wait until she’s 3 and put her in the preschool there?

I wouldn't be worried about preparing her for school at 2. Keep to one nursery so the adults, days and routines are consistent and familiar. Private nurseries are better equipped to have two year olds. Schools are better for when they are three plus.

To be fair the nursery in the school is very similar to the private nursery. Both are quite small and focus on play time rather than learning (unlike the difference in the preschool vs nursery). It was more to get her used to the school setting if we were putting her in the preschool (as you are guaranteed a place if in nursery), it is also a selfish reason to get a break. The private nursery only has space for a day and a half which is when I’m working and I’m struggling to clean or do anything around my 20m as she is very much my shadow. Lovely, but I find I can’t tidy easy.
its also £14 for a morning in the school nursery vs £44 in private if we were to gain an extra morning with the current nursery. 😅

Nursery attendance generally has no bearing on school admissions.

I would wait until shes 3.

I know people who have had kids of this age in more than one setting and it seemed to work for them. It wouldn't be what I'd choose personally for my kids though, in your shoes I'd just have them in the private nursery and maybe move them to the school one for the pre-school at 3+? My eldest stayed in a private nursery until she went to primary school though and DC2 will almost certainly do the same, so I don't have experience of school nurseries.

I mean to get into preschool as they are in the same school, they first take on the nursery, then siblings, then catchment, etc. :)

It was more to give me a morning to sort housework for £14 as opposed to the private nursery of £44 plus my private nursery has no availability for anything extra at the moment. 🙈
I dunno I just feel a bit like I’m struggling for time to do anything around the house and getting a bit overwhelmed with life.

What happens on weekends?

Also consider that by the time she has been to the school nursery in the morning, come home, had a nap you’ll be at 3pm and there isn’t much time to do anything else together like see friends and you miss out on playgroups etc.

Your DC doesn’t need to start getting used to school routines age 2 and if she hasn’t been in a nursery setting at all until now then starting two settings might be unsettling. All that said if you feel it would be better for you all if you and your DH can have a few hours to yourself then go for it. Lots of children (including mine) are in childcare four or five days and it works fine. And you can always change it if you find it’s not working.

I totally feel you on that. I have two kids and we both work (although both part time) and we can't afford a cleaner and yes the house does suffer and yes we do have to run around trying to get basics done on weekends and when they're in bed. So I get where you're coming from and I don't think there's a right or wrong answer. I still dont think I'd do it at this age, but probably would when they were like 3.5+, at that price, haha. Or if you're worried about them settling, you could always try it and pull them out if they don't settle I suppose? Or wait until they're a bit older.

My husband works long shifts on weekends, I tend to have a day to see my mom (my dad died last year so see her as much as I can as she’s home alone), and a day doing nothing in the house.
yeah you’re completely right, I really wouldn’t get much time to do anything on the one day I solely have her int he week. I’d pick her up after lunch and go straight for a drive for a nap so probably looking at 2pm before doing anything and that only leaves a few hours before dinner bath and bed.
I’d much rather go somewhere with her in the week than the weekend due to how busy things can get but if I put her in nursery I’d have no option but to do it at the weekend.
definitley food for thought, thank you!

It’s tough isn’t it 😩😩 by the time she’s in bed it’s 8pm and im so exhausted. Some days I can blitz the house others I’m barely scratching the surface. I get time to do dishes and washing machine but do those clothes every get dried/folded/put away.. 🤣 nope. I think I might just bring my mom over and have her look after my daughter for an hour in the house whilst I tidy. Probably good for her to see my mom more than nursery when she is already in one nursery.
I did consider just trialling it, there doesn’t seem to be a fee to sign up, when she starts we get 15 hours free which we’d take off the private nursery which would essentially pay for that but not sure how easy it is to drop out if we aren’t feeling it. 😅😅
I have no idea how you do it with two kids, kudos to you 🙈 I’m one and done just for my own mental health at this point

Both of mine had stopped napping by 2yo BTW!

If the private nursery is open year round they’ll need to ‘stretch’ the funding which equates to 11 hours per week. They’ll also likely charge a top yo to cover meals, nappies, consumables etc. If you haven’t already done so it would be worth asking them how much it will cost.

My DS does two days at a private nursery and two mornings at a preschool. He’s fine, and enjoys both. I’d go for it.

Ooh interesting. What age are they if you don’t mind me asking? My DD will be 23 months when she starts private nursery and would be 27 months if we did go for the school nursery.

She’s shown signs of wanting to stop naps, I.e sometimes impossible to get her to nap and she lasts until 7 just fine, if she naps now it’s a struggle to get her down for bed so quite possible she’d have stopped napping entirely by September so that is a good point. :)

He was 3 in December but had been doing the preschool sessions since October, when he was 2 years 10 months

My two were in private nursery 4 days per week. When they got their free hours they did 2 days at private nursery and 2 days at preschool. In the holidays they were back at the private nursery for 4 days.

I don't think it's a problem (obviously!) although I don't know if a 3yo is better able to cope with it than a 2yo. For us the private nursery was busy, they had about 40 kids in their 3+ room so it was nice to go to the smaller preschool as well rather than 4 full on days of chaos!