Considering not sending DD to pre-school until 4

[Mumabear5]

Hello

I just wondered if anyone else has done the same as I'm not sure what to do .

My DD has just turned 3 , I personally do not feel ready to put her into nursery / preschool just yet .

BUT ...She is very shy and so so clingy to me that I know it will probably be good for her now so am I being selfish by wanting to keep her home?

My plan was to send her when she is 4 so she will have almost a year of preschool before she starts reception as I want her to get use to that type of environment before starting school.

We go to a playgroup once a week , so she is around other children but as it's an outdoor forest type she doesn't get masses of interaction with the other children as everyone sort of runs off and does their own thing.

We do lots of activities at home but probably not enough ?

Im just in two minds , I ofcourse want whats best for her and I am worried as she is so shy I don't want her to struggle at school.

But I also know I'm not getting these years back and if I can keep her home with me for a while longer I'd like too.

Any advice would be appreciated.

Thank you x

Do you see other children during the week?

I don't think pre-school is necessary, but I think you need to do something more for socialisation than playgroup once a week. Also, do they ever spend time away from you with someone else like a grandparent or aunt? Even if only for a short time? I'm no expert but I'm assuming they should feel secure enough to not always have to be with you

I did early partly so I could work but also it made the transition to school easier, sure I missed my child but I did it to benefit them not me

Thanks for reply . Yes she spends 2 days with her grandma whilst I work. Shes perfectly fine with her grandparents . I agree , I would like to do more classes etc with her its just finding the time and the right classes ( we don't have much going on near where I live )

I have 4 children none of them went to preschool or nursery. Just started school in reception nothing before that. People did find it odd though!

Could she go on a part-time basis like two mornings a week and the afternoon with grandparents?

She may seem very young now but she will go through enormous changes this year and nursery/preschools are experienced with understanding the development of this age group. A good preschool will have lots of wonderful opportunities for exploration and fun for a 3 year old.

For what it's worth op, we had a very shy 3 year old who had only been with us or grandparents before she started preschool. When she first began (September) she cried every drop off and for some of the morning. I was ready to take her out but the preschool staff reassured me that she may just need a little more time.

Well now I'm so glad we didn't take her out because it's honestly been the best thing I think we've done for her. She's a different girl, so much more confident and happy to play with her peers, both in and out of preschool. All the teachers have commented on how much more confidence she has. Now she skips in and doesn't look back!

Obviously this is anecdotal but I thought you might like to hear our story.

Meant to add, she does 3 mornings a week so we still have plenty of time together

For shy children preschool is a good ease into socializing and then Reception won't be so overwhelming. If she is your first you may be more anxious than you need to be, and instead should instill confidence in her to try new things and meet other children. She looks to you for reactions and if you act fearful and worried she will assume that's its something to fear.

Can't you send her to a playgroup, childminder or preschool a few mornings a week in September so she's prepared to separate from familiar people and mix? Most kids go to full time reception at 4