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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

CHILDMINDERS PLEASE HELP!!!!!!!

19 replies

coolj · 14/03/2008 15:01

Hi I wonder if anyone could help me with a dilema. This morning one of my childmindees mums rang and said her child would not be coming today because he had a cold. I sent my sympathies but she said in not so many words that it could have been avoided and it was my fault and he must have caught it from me as I had a cold last week but not bad enough to warrant time off and letting down parents. I said to her that I only have to advise parents of infectious diseases and not the common cold (is this right). She was really off with me and started spounting off the contract to me saying I should have advised her of any family illness. Am I in the wrong here??? She does tend to wrap this child up in cottonwool and wont let him in anyones car in case of an accident etc. In saying that he had an accident at home (fairly bad) last week and it was their fault. Talk about double standards??

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Katisha · 14/03/2008 15:03

What on earth is she going to do when the child goes to school? Take no notice - you can't stop the spread of the common cold. My mother always tries to trace the route of any cold anyone gets and it really annoys me.
(I'm a parent who uses a childminder by the way.)

Original poster

coolj · 14/03/2008 15:08

Thanks Katisha. I came off the phone this morning totally wound up. I am fairly new at childminding and try to do everything by the book. I did ask her what would happen when he goes to school. I said he will get everthing going including the dreaded head lice, chickenpox etc but she wasnt that interested. She also said that she wanted to cut down his hours to term time only. He only comes 2mornings per week as it is. Does anyone think I should charge more??

OP posts:

Tinker · 14/03/2008 15:11

But she would have had to take time off if you had been off presumably? How odd. Is it the time off or "illness" that she is worried about?

Original poster

coolj · 14/03/2008 15:16

The thing is she doesnt work. Just wants some 'me' time.

OP posts:

BoysAreLikeDogs · 14/03/2008 16:40

Oh dear coolj, this is tricky when you are new to minding.

I understand that the parent is concerned about infectious diseases, and protecting LO, but really a cold is normal, no need for you to stop work, and as you say let the parents down.

(Whether or not she works is immaterial)

Children do catch colds, many of them.

A cold is not a notifialble disease, bless her.

I hope you can see that she is a bit overprotective, and this does not affect your working relationship.

HTH

BoysAreLikeDogs · 14/03/2008 16:47

I have posted a link in the CM staffroom, hopefully you'll get some more of us piling in to help

MaureenMLove · 14/03/2008 17:02

Presumably she still has to pay you for today? Afterall it was her choice to keep the child at home and you were availabe to work. Maybe that's why she was so rude. If you had taken time off last week, then she won't need to pay you. Whatever the reason, I think she was being very unfair blaming you.

Do you charge her more since she uses you only 2 mornings? If she is only going to use you term time only, then yes I would charge more or a retainer for the school holidays. The reason being, that you won't be able to fill that space with a full timer and you'll be holding a place open for her.

Original poster

coolj · 14/03/2008 17:44

Hi everyone sorry I took time out to do internet shopping at Tesco and once I finished I managed to lose everything I did. It only took me 2 hours... Im not having a good day.

Thanks for your input MaureenMLove. At present I charge her the same as everyone else. I think if I asked her for a retainer during the holidays she would just cancel the contract altogether. I might just see what happens on Monday if she comes or not.

OP posts:

BoysAreLikeDogs · 14/03/2008 17:45

coolj, please feel free to join us in the CM staffroom, all are welcome

MaureenMLove · 14/03/2008 18:53

Fair enough Coolj, but if she kicks off about it, it might be worth mentioning that it is general practice and its unlikely that she'll fine anyone that won't charge a retainer. Don't let her walk all over you. There's lots of cm's in the staff room, that can offer advice and sympathy whenever needed!

Glubs · 15/03/2008 21:55

I don't mean to sound harsh, but I think you should definitely ask for a retainer, I don't know any childminder who would keep a place open for just term time and just charge for the hours used.

As for the illness thing, a common cold is surely what we all expect our children and us to get periodically from mixing with other children. My child has caught colds from being at the childminder and has also given colds to other children, it's accepted as part of life.

I hesitate to say, but maybe if this client is being difficult she may do you a favour by quitting and you can get someone else to fill the place who is more on your wavelength.

rookiemater · 15/03/2008 22:39

I'm not a CM but just browsing the post. I would suggest to her that yes you can do term time only but if she doesn't pay a retainer then thats fine, but if you get any other mindees then her child won't get its place back.

vixma · 15/03/2008 22:58

I am also a childminder and you are absolutly right. If you picked up a cold from her child you would not be complaining to them. She sounds stressed out so dont bother taking it personally. The contract thing....its a cold, not the plague. Obviously if you were aware something nasty was going around you would of contacted her. It sounds like she is stressed, and has taking her mood out on you. Well done for being a good childminder who cares about her children enough to be aware of risk.

Original poster

coolj · 16/03/2008 09:44

Thanks for all your support ladies, it feels better just to have a whinge. I cant wait until tomorrow, not....

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Mum2Luke · 16/03/2008 17:00

Sounds a bit pathetic that she's blaming you! I have a cold at the mo too (caught by a mindee I may add who is always coughing over everyone despite me reminding him to cover his mouth and wash his nads after sneezing.

She needs to stop wrapping him in cottonwool, when he goes to school he is going to catch all sorts so he may as well start now!

If she is using you for 'me time' and not working, tell her people have been ringing you for full-time places (even if they havent) and you need to know if she either wants the place permanently or just now and then in which case you will have to charge her full time rate and she may think twice about moaning!

Original poster

coolj · 17/03/2008 10:45

Hi all. Its Monday and guess what. The poor darling still has sniffles and is not able to come today. (Theres a surprise!) Thanks for your input Mum2Luke. I have looked after her DS since January and it is on a permanent basis, ie 2 mornings per week.Trust me if someone came along who wanted the space I would give it to them. Its just that 'beggars cant be choosers' if you know what I mean. To be fair she has been ok up until now. Think she is just very overprotective with her son (except a couple of weeks ago when he burned his face on a blowtorch!!!!!!!!!!) where was the overprotective mum then?????? God I am turning bitchy now?

OP posts:

sophiewd · 17/03/2008 10:51

How the hell did she manage to burn his face on a blow torch?

catchingzeds · 17/03/2008 10:55

Tis only a cold and I completely agree with you but I hope she's not a mumsnetter! There can't be too many children about who had a burnt face last week from a blowtorch

Original poster

coolj · 17/03/2008 11:03

Didnt really get the whole story mum said it happened with a candle, dad said different. I just recorded the injury in accident book. And she whinged at me for passing on a cold even though he only comes 2 mornings a week. He could have got it from anywhere same as me.

OP posts:

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