Expectations of Childminder

[Flittingaboutagain]

What does your childminder do to help teach social skills?

I observed our CM today telling a preschool age mindee not to be so nosey when the child asked very socially appropriate questions such as who are you? what's your name? There was no curiosity or guidance. Just shutdown.

It got me thinking if your CM has poor social skills and/or knowledge of child development, what impact does this have on how our children learn how to make friends and be socially successful?

Secondly, how many times a day does your CM send you photos or videos? A bit concerned that the CM is on the phone on and off all day messaging all the parents if the level is normal for all the mindees.

Also use childminder. I think they develop better social skills as they are around different children a lot (my childminder goes to various play group sessions/childminder meet ups). I receive 0-3 pictures per day (1 child with her all day and one before and after school- mostly updates of the littlest). I don’t think she is on her phone too much. There are periods where they will get less interaction from her (pick up drop of times when parents want a chat at the door). I don’t mind - they are usually too busy playing to notice.

there is a childminder near me and every time she walks past my house one of the children is crying. She makes no attempt to stop and comfort the child. I would be unhappy if this was my child daily but don’t know what to do about it.

Thank you for replying. I get 5-10 photos a day plus a couple of videos but often with a typed descriptive message too. We're a screen free house including phones.

That's so sad for the little one you've seen crying. Is it the same one, or just always one of her mindees?

Even when DSs were with her full time our CM only got in touch if there was a problem or something cute/exciting.

In terms of social interaction you have, I fear, to go with your gut. I know our CM’s social skills are better than mine. We did have a hiccough when she was trying to help (after school) with maths and getting it wrong…but that’s been the only occasion I’ve ever had to have a chat (I still shudder with the memory). The big reason the boys still go to her a decade later is how well her values align with ours.

Can’t comment on the poor social skills part but in terms of photos, we get them most days. Our childminder has a WhatsApp group for mindees’ parents and all photos go on there once a day, sometimes with a description of activities.

A lot of parents want photos. It's quite unusual to be a screen free house, so I think more parents would value the regular updates than not.

I used to be a CM and I did see a lot of childcare that I wouldn't have been happy about if it was my children in that setting. The drawback to using a CM is that the care standards are so individual - parents have selected an 'at home' setting, but not all homes are equal. Just as some parents are better/worse at interacting with and teaching children, so too are childminders.
You have to choose carefully - talk to the CM, read their policies, ask about what they do during the day and how they will deliver early years education.
I'm not sure nurseries are better though - they can vary in quality as much as childminders.
The reality in many areas is that there's not enough childcare places for the number of parents who require them and many childminders are working around their own children's needs, rather than running a mini professional nursery, so it's a bit of a pot luck situation.
There are also some parents who want a nanny level service for less than minimum wage and they are unlikely to get this, since a CM will be balancing the needs of children from several families, along with their own dc.
I think the best way to find someone is through personal recommendations, if at all possible.

To be honest, messaging photos takes moments and the children are likely to be engrossed in play so I really wouldn’t worry about that. Perhaps the childminder has had a comment in the past that she doesn’t send enough. Most parents appreciate having snap shots of what their child is up to