Put off after childminder settling in session

[Weloveflowerss]

Dropped my 5 month old and 2 year old off to childminders. She just took the 2 year old, didn’t ask any questions about milk (she takes gaviscon), naps etc. settling in session is only an hour but when I dropped them at nursery for theirs they asked all these questions. Then when I went to pick up it was the assistant who gave them back to me and when I asked if she fed they said yes but didn’t know how much, then childminder shouted something like 120mls, turns out it was only 50. Am I being unreasonable? Just nursery asked me all this.

You surely know that you're not being unreasonable.

If they can't be bothered with these details on the settling in session, they never will be, so only stick with them if you think that it's ok and if you're happy not to be communicated with.

I should add they gave me a form today to fill out where I can detail about feeding an naps etc.

I just didn’t know if because it was a settling in whether they just don’t bother with all the details.

The only explanation I can think of that would be somewhat acceptable is that generally quick drop offs are better for many kids so they didn't want you hanging around longer than necessary at drop off. If that's the case though, they should have made sure they had asked you about milk/nap needs, dietary reqs etc.

Childminders are individuals. Some are great, some are not. Some are great at ticking all the boxes but aren't a good fit for the child, some are great with the kids but aren't a good fit for the parent.

Trust yourself here, and look elsewhere. You're not happy. Your kids will sense this.

No, I wouldn't be happy. I would want a decent chat after a settling in session, details on how they were, what they did/ate etc.

Why are they going to a childminder rather than nursery?

Thanks, I am not happy either and good to know I’m not being fussy.
they are doing 3 days at nursery which is near DH work (work is 40 mins away and this nursery is the only one which is open before 8 and closes at 6) and 2 days with childminder as it is nearer our home and DH WFH one day a week, so makes sense rather than travelling 40 mins to drop at nursery and then travel back.

I should add they are not going to a nursery near me as I work shifts x

You can explain away some of it and I think you're coming across a bit passive. Why would you leave a child who needs meds with their milk, without first explaining about their meds? It's your responsibility to make sure caregivers know about it. It shouldn't rely on someone giving you a form. Maybe a bit of grace on both sides this time if it was only for an hour and you weren't expecting them to need feeding.

However you should listen to your intuition. If it doesn't feel right, keep looking.

No I wouldn’t be happy with this and would swiftly move on to finding someone or somewhere else

I'm not sure why you would be dropping off your children with someone for the first time and they don't have this information already? Did you not have a meeting first to discuss your children and sign contracts?

As a childminder myself I wouldn't do a settling in session without having done at least 2 visits with a parent. I would already know all the details about the children long before the first visit without a parent.

Exactly this. I'm a childminder and have a lot of communication with parents, both face to face and via messaging so I know what I need to know about the child before I even meet them!

I would have met you at least 3 times chatted about baby and routines etc. Before arranging settling you would also have had an all about me form detailing feeds sleeps and comforts, permission slips etc I don't understand why anyone wouldn't want this information it's basic.

She said because it’s only for an hour she didn’t feel the need, said it’s instinct on how to look after a baby as she has been doing this for many years and has children herself.

She said because it’s only for an hour she didn’t feel the need, said it’s instinct on how to look after a baby as she has been doing this for many years and has children herself.

Look for someone else.

All babies are individuals I've been doing it since 95

She has 2 other assistants but said they don’t do key workers there as they are all family. Is this normal?

And also said that she didn’t want to sound pompous but she has a very good rep and a long waiting list and I can speak to one of the parents at drop off to ease my worries.