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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

How do I sack our new nanny?

26 replies

litdog · 11/02/2008 20:43

Our nanny has been with us for a week and we're just not happy with her. Our old says she wants to come back, and we want her back.
The new one is really lazy - leaves bottles for me to wash up, doesn't put clean clothes in drawers etc - and this is week one when she should be at her most enthusiastic!
We haven't declared her yet as I wanted a trial period - but we are sure now we want her to go... ASAP. We just have bad gut feelings and don't think she's nice enough to our three children.

What do I do? I don't want to be mean about it, I don't want to upset her - I just want her out. I don't think she'll have a problem finding a new job - she's very qualified, but she won't be happy.

What can I say and how much money should we give her, notice etc? I want her out ASAP as our lovely old nanny can start now.

Please advise - I feel so unhappy as I don't think she's good for our children (they seem unhappy too) and I just want her gone - but I don't want to be horrid or break the law.

Thank you.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

avenanap · 11/02/2008 20:47

Just tell her that things are not working out. Tell her that you appreciate all that she has done for you but you have used nannies for a long time and you can tell that you are not the right family for her. If she's only on a trial then I would give her severance pay if you can, not alot because she's only been with you for a week, maybe 1 week max? Tell her that you are willing to give her an excellent reference (write about her good points, not that she's lazy).

flowerybeanbag · 11/02/2008 20:48

litdog don't worry too much about the law, if she's only been with you a week she has virtually no employment rights.

I'd be inclined to just meet with her, say you don't feel it's working out and you would like to bring an immediate end to her employment. You don't actually have to but I would probably pay her a week's notice (unless your contract says more), and confirm it in writing just briefly.

ShinyDysonHereICome · 11/02/2008 20:49

You can sack somebody in the first 12 months without breaking any employment laws, so long as no descrimination has taken place.

What is in the contract that you have with her? Was a trial perios specified? if so that should provide detail as to how much notice is applicable throughout this period but I think a month is usually acceptable.

I would have chat with her, ask her how she thinks things are going before saying what you think. A month's salary would be the minimum you should pay in notice I'd say, especially considering she may have left a good job to take up employment with you.

What kind of job did she leave to join you? Did you not have a trial day with her before offering her the job?

YouKnowNothingOfTheCrunch · 11/02/2008 20:53

Wouldn't it be kinder to simply say that although she has been good your previous nanny - who has a long-established relationship with your dcs - has become available?

mightymoosh · 11/02/2008 21:01

hmmm as a nanny not sure of that crunch, would much prefer the truth and a chance to work on any probs- if not in this position, then in the next. a weeks pay in leiu (sp) of notice should be fine.

NAB3wishesfor2008 · 11/02/2008 21:02

Tell her it isn't working out and here is a weeks money.

Don't tell her the old nanny is coming back. I used to be a nanny and that would have pissed me off big time.

Contract?

frannikin · 11/02/2008 21:07

Agree - would check contract first, but if not specified then notice and a weeks pay.

ShinyDysonHereICome · 11/02/2008 21:17

I really do think a weeks salary is not fair to be honest.

Consider it from your position- if you left a good job, started a new one, only to be given a week's notice. So only a weeks money, with a mortage and bills to pay

NAB3wishesfor2008 · 11/02/2008 21:20

I took a nanny job on trial. If it ended within the first month I got a weeks money after that I was on bigger notice. She doesn't deserve more. She isn't doing her job.

Original poster

litdog · 11/02/2008 21:23

She didn't leave a job - she was unemployed before (had left her old job six months ago).

We don't have a contract - I was going to sort all that out with Nannytax but just haven't sorted it yet as I wanted a trial period. I suggested a trial period to her but she said there would be no need as she liked us (ooh I feel mean now).

She doesn't have a mortgage or bills - lives with her grandparents rent-free...

Thank you for all the replies -you have made me feel better, and better able to deal with this in the kindest way possible. Interesting too about not telling her the old one is coming back - I hadn't thought of that but of course that would be annoying.

Thanks guys

M
x

OP posts:

NAB3wishesfor2008 · 11/02/2008 21:26

i think she owuld feel used if you said about your old nanny coming back and may be more likely to cause trouble.

flowerybeanbag · 11/02/2008 21:29

I really wouldn't pay more than a week, regardless of her situation. She's been there a week and isn't doing a good job.

Plus a month's salary for a family to pay out when they will also have to pay another nanny is an awful lot of money.

Original poster

litdog · 11/02/2008 21:31

Tell me about it! This whole exercise is proving seriously expensive

OP posts:

frannikin · 11/02/2008 21:49

Don't give her more than a week if you don't have a contract. You wouldn't technically have to give her anything.

Original poster

litdog · 11/02/2008 21:56

Thanks. Really appreciate it

OP posts:

YouKnowNothingOfTheCrunch · 11/02/2008 22:01

I stand corrected

NiftyNanny · 11/02/2008 22:28

I think a week's notice during a trial period is fair. It's a shame you didn't get the trial period in writing- it seems fairly standard, and the trial period is for you as employers, not just for her to settle in and decide whether she wants to stay.

To be honest I personally would feel happier if the old nanny was coming back. it would make the whole situation about the existing relationship and not about my faults... if that makes sense? You know the old nanny, the kids know the old nanny, she's become available again and well - bingo. less effort. tell her you're wimping out... it's not about her, etc etc. a nice reference and off she goes. hopefully some of the leads she was chasing before you took her on will still be "live" at this point, so the sooner the better.

jess28 · 11/02/2008 23:06

Interesting to see a couple of you mention giving her a good reference - as someone currently looking for a nanny, it makes me feel a bit uneasy to think people might be giving out good references just to "smooth things over" when really the nanny wasn't doing her job... no?

chipkid · 11/02/2008 23:13

Difficult to see how you can give a "good reference" based on one weeks service!-how much can you really know in a week! As a prospective employer of a nanny-I would say that the length of service speaks for itself!

seeker · 11/02/2008 23:17

Was washing up and putting clothes away in her job description?

avenanap · 11/02/2008 23:20

Well, you just have to think of the good things that she's done. Is she kind and gentle? I think it is far better that a nanny can care for your children then to wash up. I didn't expect my nanny to do the washing ect, I just wanted her to care for my son and for him to be happy. Were the children unhappy because she was new and they wanted their old nanny? what did she do with them during th day? was she creative? were they well taken care of? that's what you should put in a reference. I'm sure any employer would look at how long she has been with the family and use their judgment.

Original poster

litdog · 12/02/2008 12:39

Thanks everyone. Her job description was all nursery duties including making and washign up bottles, making feeding and clearing away their meals, and doing their laundry. To me, doing their laundry means putting the clean stuff away rather than leaving it on a chair in their rooms - surely that's not being picky?
Nifty you made some interesting points about being happier if the old one was coming back.
Also I am slightly troubled at the reference thing as in our very short experience she hasn't been very good - throwing the baby in the air after her bottle (result: vomit, quelle surprise!) and I don't want to recommend her to someone else who might have the same experience all over again.
I think I will offer to give a ref and then write a bit of a vague one saying some positive stuff about her which I will think up.
Next question - do I do it tonight or tomorrow morning? I won't be back from work til half eight tonight, and she lives two hours away by train. Plus she will have to pack. Would it be kinder to do it tomorrow morning so she doesn't have to spend a night with us feeling horrid?

OP posts:

NAB3wishesfor2008 · 12/02/2008 13:17

Nursery duties should/does include anything to do with the children. In my first live in nanny job I worked 12 hour days (Mum was a SAHM) and I cooked all the food and prepared all her bottles, cleaned her bedroom and bathroom including hoovering it and her playroom every day. I would load and empty the dishwasher, keep her toys tidy, take her out, change her cot as and when, did all her washing, kept her shoes polished when she had them, etc etc.

Do not give a good reference if it is to smooth things over. How would you feel if someone else did that and the nanny turned out to be unsuitable for you. TBH I wouldn't bother for 1 week.

fridayschild · 12/02/2008 13:50

I expect to have to read between the lines on a reference. Specifically, what is not said? So your reference could say she is a well-presented nanny with a good sense of humour, for example. It does not say she struck an immediate rapport with the DCs, or that she dealt with her duties promptly and effectively. Can you phrase it like that, and still be true both to yourself and to other nanny-employers out there?

A short period of employment says a lot too. I also expect to be telephoned about the nanny at some point, and to be more forthcoming on the phone.

flowerybeanbag · 12/02/2008 14:03

References should be fair, accurate and must not give an overall misleading impression of the candidate. They must be based on verifiable facts and you have a duty of care both to the ex-employee and to his/her new employer. I would say that particularly applies with nannies as references are so important, more so than with other professions.

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