Advice on employing a nanny and them bringing their children to work

[Bippityboppitybo]

Hello

After a bit of advice on employing a nanny. I've registered our vacancy with a couple of agencies but also been having a look on Childcare.co.uk. My main question is how do people feel about nannies bringing their children to work with then? 80% of the profiles I'm viewing on childcare.co.uk all say they want to bring their young children with them (ranging from babies to almost school age toddlers).

I'm concerned that this would mean my two children (6 months and 2 years) would get less attention and I'm also concerned about the legalities of this. Would the nanny not have to register as a childminder?

I'm also concerned about having another child in my house just in case they got injured or something (obviously my house is childproof but everyone must have different levels of childproofing!).

Another concern I have is that I want the nanny to take my children to babygroups/classes etc but would that mean I have to pay for the nanny's children too? Same with a nanny purse, I dont want to be paying for someone else's child's lunches etc.

However, it seems like it could be a good thing for my children to interact with other similar aged children.

Any advice?

This set up works really well for some people and not at all for others, it will really depend on the personalities involved.

Based on your post I would say it probably won't work for you. You need to be fairly laid back/relaxed and have a give and take approach for it to work and it doesn't seem like that's what you want, which is totally fair enough. I'd probably look at other options.

In answer to the legal question, yes it's perfectly legal. No, the nanny wouldn't have to register as a childminder because she would be working from your house and not hers and only looking after children from two families (hers and yours), which makes her a nanny and not a childminder. You would be her employer as with any other nanny.

Don’t do it. Your kids will get ignored or overlooked, particularly if the nanny’s child is much younger.

If you do go for a NWOC I would look for one where her child is the eldest, given how young your two are. Three small babies/toddlers would be logistically too difficult I think.

I can clearly remember my mother child minding when I was a preschooler and hating the other kids that came into our home. I assume it was because they got all the attention and took all my toys. Personally I wouldn’t but it depends on ether you’re going to be forced into a situation where you have no choice.

One other piece of advice, if you do go down this road look for someone who was a nanny before having children and now brings their child with them rather than someone who was doing something else, has had a child and has now decided they're a nanny just to have a job they can take their child to. World of difference between those two scenarios!

I would have thought one problem might be illness. If the nanny's child is sick and needs to be at home or at least isolating, unless she has a WFH partner it means more days where you won't have cover.

But that's true of anyone with children isn't it?! That's not relevant to whether she brings her child with her. Should no-one employ a woman with children?

A friend of mine had this scenario. Their nanny had worked for them for a while, then had her own baby and returned to work bringing the baby with her. Because they knew the nanny well they trusted she would look after their children properly despite having her own child there. The trade off was that it then became a 'nanny share' as their nanny was caring for another child too, and therefore they paid her a little less. That might seem unfair, but the alternative was they said no to her bringing her baby and she either had to seek and fund her own childcare, or find another job. It worked out better financially for all of them for her to look after all the children together.

For some it can work wonderfully and your child has a playmate

for many it doesn’t work out

in the end as much as nannies say it won’t happen - they will favour their own child - it’s instinct if both are playing on a climbing frame for example and both fall. The nanny will go to their child first

so it’s better to have an older child than yours if possible

many nannies say they get paid the same. I don’t think this is fair

1. your child won’t get 100% attention

2. nanny has no childcare costs

3. it’s a privilege to take your own child to work. No other job /career would allow this

so a lower rate for a nwoc is fair.

yes a nanny may want to bring their own child but doesn’t mean you have to let them

if it’s a 4/5 day role doing 2 days with is a compromise and other days the nanny puts their child in nursery /cm /grandparents /dad etx

I agree with @NuffSaidSam. I take my 5yo to work with me and have since she was 5mo old. It works well for us because both my current employer and my previous employer liked the idea of having another child in the house. I pay for my own daughters activities not my employer, and pay for her to tag along to things my employer has chosen for their children to do. Despite what some say, she doesn't get favoured, I think I'm more professional than that. She slots into their family quite nicely, she's a chilled out child and regularly spends 45min or so playing quietly while I do their homework with them. They tell people they're siblings and my daughter tells me employer she's her second favourite mummy 🤣 I love it because my daughter is an only child and it means she's not spending her whole life as the centre of attention. In return I give them lots of flexibility. My husband's job is really flexible so if she's ill, she stays at home with him. However I don't think it would work in your circumstances - I find the set up tends to really only work where families feel positive about the arrangement from the start and not those who need to be persuaded.

With a 6 month old and 2 year old I would be reluctant to employ a nanny with their own child. Having worked as a nanny with this age group, they need a lot of attention and adding a 3rd child which is presumably under school age would make it difficult to give full attention to them all. If the nannies child is unwell will she be bringing them into your house to infect your children, or will she call in sick and leave you without childcare? There are lots of things to think about here. There are plenty of nannies without children and also older nannies who's children are independent.

And no uou wouldn't pay for the nannies child to attend activities. The nanny would pay for them

but def sounds like you aren’t sure about a nwoc

maybe contact agencies to see what nannies they have with no children /older with childcare

You can have issues as I did when, eg, you want your child to do something that their child doesn't like/ is in the nap time/ starts playing up when there so your child suffers. Or when it's something that your nanny can't afford so she can't pay for her child.

A childminder could have 3 children aged under 5 in her own home. I've done this as a childminder and it was absolutely fine. I imagine a nanny in your home with 3 children to care for would be much the same.

The ages of the children are important though. A childminder can only have 1 child aged under 12 months. I would stick with this approach. I would want her own child to be at least 12 months old, ideally 18 months +. Your 2 year old would have a playmate and your 6 month old would still have enough attention being the youngest.

I found a mixed age group great. The young ones learn really well from those that are a bit older. The older ones learn about looking after the baby and being gentle, sharing etc.

As others have said, you need an experienced nanny who is used to looking after several children at the same time, as oppose to a mum with a baby who has decided to become a nanny for the first time as it fits around her child.

The nanny should fund her own child's costs for playgroups etc. As for food, 1 extra toddler mouth to feed wouldn't normally cost more than £1 or £2 a day so I wouldn't get worked up over food costs. A nanny with her own child would generally be paid a slightly lower hourly rate to reflect the shared arrangement which would more than cover a few extra toddler meals and snacks.

will she call in sick and leave you without childcare? There are lots of things to think about here. There are plenty of nannies without children and also older nannies who's children are independent.

This is nothing to do with her bringing her child with her @steppingcarefully , but just down to having a child.

Now, would you say this in any other context? Don't employ women who have children as teachers/police officers/lawyers/office staff because they may need time off to care for a sick child? I doubt it. It's a disgraceful thing to think and even worse to say.

I have gone through this scenario twice. One I employed as a nanny when she already had her own toddler - mine was a baby. To be honest - yes it was a bit cheaper than the other options I had at the time.
And then later my (different) nanny got pregnant by surprise as a much older mum. She had some time out and then came back to us and brought her baby with her when she needed to. My child was 3 years older than hers.
In both cases it was completely fine. I never felt my child was disadvantaged by this.

It can work really well... my DS and nanny's child were the same age which worked out really well.

There may be a few things that need to be discussed; special toys your DC don't want to share, who pays for food if nanny and all children eat together, activities chosen by employer (some were happy to have two for the same price, some had sibling discount, some the nanny paid for), extra equipment needed (double buggy, travel cot for naps, high chair).

With three kids... life will be hectic.... you will have to take that into account.. not that she will put her child first as I never saw that (though I know that emotionally of course she did!!) ... but three is full on!!

Well it’s cheaper and it works for a lot of people. Ideally they’d have a slightly older
child.

We tried this with our nanny (who had been with us for several years before she had a baby). It didn’t work - she did the absolute minimum with our children (who are older than her child) and we were relieved when she eventually resigned.

I'm a nanny and I bring my son to work with me since he was 9 months but I only look after children of school age and it works well for me and my employer.I do slightly longer hours during school holidays.I think NWOC would only work if you had school age children that are slightly more self efficient.My son is 3 and he enoues the company he gets at work.

I know a family that do this and it's cheaper - they effectively pay for a nanny share. they ended up with is as they basically needed nanny hours due to their jobs, but couldn't afford a nanny at normal rate. It works really well for them - the nanny's child is the same age and they have company. However, both their child and they are very chilled out, and then nanny is excellent.

I’m a nanny and have taken mine to work with me before. My youngest is 9 though and at full time school so that makes a difference to some families

it can work really well

I have a NWOC but as an after school nanny - she brings her own baby with her. It was not my first choice scenario, but market forces prevailed - decent after-school nannies are really hard to find so I gave it a try and it's actually worked out really well. She was a professional nanny before she had her own and her professionalism was what impressed me.

However, I wouldn't have done it if I had two preschoolers.

If you do it then usually 25% or so off going rate and put into the contract that the ability to bring own child is reviewed at 3m and then every 6m.