baby not settling!

[mollythetortoise]

Hi all, I had a settling in session for my 8 month old this am with new childminder and apparently he cried the whole hour he was there. I had never really left him before so didn't know how he would react but did not think he would be that upset. I know 8 months is a bad age developmentally for leaving them so hope this phase won't last. Have any of you CM's had babies that didn't settle or do all babies settle given time? I felt v bad for the CM too, she must be thinking he is a nightmare baby!

mollythetortoise she wont be thinking he is a nightmare baby love dont worry, most babies cry like that at the first visit (and some for quite a few visits after).

But on the whole 99% do settle, will you be taking him for more settling in sessions.

I have a baby settling in too who is a little older, but in same situation. It just takes time. {reassuring pat on shoulder}

I agree with shoshe on settling in sessions, do lots of hour ones if you can.I vary my approaches when my new mindee is upset too ie sometimes hug/carry, sing songs, sit on knee and play with older kids to distract, go out, etc), if cm is experienced she will have plenty of tricks up her sleeve to put your baby at ease with her. Keep communication as open as poss between you both, she should be reassuring you.

Can you write her down any rhymes/songs you sing? A favourite musical toy from home, or cuddly toy even? Any little tips on what he/she likes, ie patting or rubbing back etc, these are things baby love the familiarity of that is often forgotten when communicating eith childcarers.

It is a big change but your dc will settle,

Sorry my keyboard is playing up as usual!

It's a very scary experince for a baby to have a change in their routine, especially in someone elses home who they don't know. You'll probably find that your LO will settle after the first couple of visits and, as Kay said, the CM will hopefully have tricks up her sleeve to help distract your LO.

My DS was 6 months when I sent him to a CM and took a few days to settle properly, but was fine when he realised that his CM was brilliant and that I was back to collect him at the end of the day!

I had one baby who had several one-hour sessions, and she screamed the house down for the entire hour. It certainly wasn't a problem for me - but I am sure that it was for her poor mum, who probably had the same worries as you have.

We gradually increased the hour to two hours and it soon sorted itself out. She is now a delightful three-year who happily runs into my house each morning.

I have never had a baby or child who hasn't settled in, if that is of any consolation at all.

I had one baby who had several one-hour sessions, and she screamed the house down for the entire hour. It certainly wasn't a problem for me - but I am sure that it was for her poor mum, who probably had the same worries as you have.

We gradually increased the hour to two hours and it soon sorted itself out. She is now a delightful three-year who happily runs into my house each morning.

I have never had a baby or child who hasn't settled in, if that is of any consolation at all.

Oops, I only had the one baby!!

i had a call last night for me to start this morning with an 8mth old girl she came today for 8hrs and cried most of them because
a) she didnt know me
b) she didnt know my house
c) she didnt know the other children
d) didnt know if mum was coming back

as soon as she saw mum she had big smiles hopefully tomo will be better

give your ds time to settle as soon as he realises the cm cleans him, feeds him and returns him to you the better

thanks everyone. i do feel abit better now! my ds will only be going one a day a week (all day) so i guess this is not ideal for helping with famililarity etc. we are going to try again on wed and keep fingers crossed!

one day is not ideal as babys do forget and a week seems so long
could you not afford/if cm has a place to send him one extra morning/afternoon a week?