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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

Newborn childminder vs nursery??

68 replies

pinacolada22 · 21/05/2022 22:26

I have been working from home with my baby girl since she was 5 days old. She's 10 weeks now and I am in desperate need of childcare! I am not sure what would be better for: a child minder or nursery? She has never been around other children, and is only really familiar with myself as I don't have close family/friends around.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

noscoobydoodle · 22/05/2022 19:29

My kids went to two different nurseries that took babies - I know when DD started at 5 months there was a baby at 11 weeks there too. The staff doted on the little ones and I was really happy with the setup. I did visit a couple of nurseries and they weren't all great so do visit and ask questions. We took milk in to be stored in the fridge. At the time I chose nursery because I had very little job flexibility and there were multiple staff at nursery, so less chance of them not being available

Lilililili · 22/05/2022 19:47

For pumping I'd get a good electric pump like e.g. Medela swing, and a good freezer bag. You can express the milk, put straight into the fridge, and then transport in the cool bag. Try to express a bit more than needed so you build up a freezer stash. You can best store the milk for the freezer in freezer milk bags and defrost overnight. So overall you need

Pump (plus the bottle(s) it comes with that you express into)

Bottles for baby to drink from - start with smallest size teats

Freezer milk bags

Freezer pack for transporting the milk

As far as I know if you have a dishwasher you don't need a steriliser as dishwasher is enough to sterilise the bottles between uses.

When you give the baby the milk, you can just stand it in a jug of hot water for 5 min to warm it up a bit.

Geranium1984 · 22/05/2022 19:51

Childminder of a nanny. Her routine will be changing every couple of months so you will want someone who can respond to that and give more 1:1 care.

Starlightstarbright1 · 22/05/2022 19:56

I was a childminder, had baby from 6 weeks.

Go visit, trust your gut instinct..

I would also use a c/m at that age.

Also open up a cms claim.. even if he isn't traced he will bee building areas.

Starlightstarbright1 · 22/05/2022 19:58

Meant to add Baby and me still have a strong bond years later .

I also had b/f babies. Mum supplied some fesh milk but i also had a few spare bags frozen.

Wasywasydoodah · 22/05/2022 20:00

if you can, it’s worth getting double electric pump. Hiring them is a good option. Saves loads of time, and you will be grateful because pumping is time consuming. Also, don’t beat yourself up if you need to use formula to survive! Ignore people on here who are judgy. You’re doing amazingly, by the sounds of it. I’d prefer a childminder at this age.

CrabbyCat · 22/05/2022 20:02

We've used both nursery (pre Covid with DC1 and DC2) and childminder (post Covid with DC2 and 3). Whilst the range of activities is better at nursery, I wouldn't say that was important to mine until maybe age 2.5 ish. Younger than that, the staff continuity at the childminder wins. Even in a good nursery, staff change, they work shifts so they aren't there the whole day, and of course the kids regularly move up rooms. For my DC, I had a lot less trouble with them getting upset at drop off with a childminder.

The downside of a childminder can be reliability. However, they can work in teams of up to 3 with another childminder / an assistant. The only time ours has closed in almost 2 years was once due to compulsory Covid isolation for all staff and children. They also cover each others annual leave so they are open all year other than Christmas. I've heard of similar arrangements elsewhere so it might be something to look for .

User280905 · 22/05/2022 20:04

You're facing some hard choices here op, well done for facing up to them. I hope things get easier for you. And your baby won't forget you, that's one thing you really don't need to worry about

ReginaGeorgeismyname · 22/05/2022 20:32

Lots of judgy comments on here. If the OP posted she's on benefits as she has a newborn and no support people would be falling over themselves to tell her to get a job!

I actually just came on to say I hope you are aware of the tax free childcare scheme? If not look into it. If you are not eligible for universal credit top up for your wages/help with childcare then this scheme will save you some money.

I think I would go for a childminder at this age. Some nurseries have quite high turn overs and many staff work shifts - I think more settling for a very young baby to get attached to one person in a childcare capacity.

SouthLondonMum22 · 22/05/2022 20:47

Mine will start nursery at 6 weeks. Full time too, the horror.

We decided to go with nursery instead of a childminder because I feel nursery is more reliable and we feel more comfortable with multiple adults rather than just one adult present.

Both have pros and cons but either way, your baby will be just fine. Don't let anyone make you feel guilty.

Kite22 · 22/05/2022 20:50

There are some shockingly unhelpful and unkind comments on here.

OP has explained her circumstances, and needs to find childcare. Trying to make her feel bad with the "I wouldn't leave such a young child" etc. is just downright nasty. Bully for you that your circumstances are such that you can afford that choice. OP doesn't have that choice.

It is also a whole load of nonsense being spoken about it being too young for a child to be looked after by someone else. It's not so long ago that maternity leave for everyone was 12 weeks - just the same age as the OP's baby is likely to be when she finds someone. All those dc have grown up just fine.

I personally think you will struggle to find a child minder who will take under age 1
This is utter nonsense too.
As is all the stuff about needing 1:1 attention - how do you think 2nd, 3rd, and 4th children cope in life? Or multiples?

clumperoo · 22/05/2022 21:25

My baby went to nursery at 6m but I think they take them from 3m

Never had any issues with settling in ay that age and and is incredibly socialable and outgoing

Pinkbananas01 · 22/05/2022 21:57

I'm a childminder, we can only have 1 small baby at a time & 3 under 5s in total. So it's basically like being part of a family. Small babies/toddlers need to develop a good bond with whoever is looking after them, it's essential for their wellbeing & development (Suzanne Zeedyt has a lot to say if anyone is interested). I treat all the children I look after as an extended part of my family but this absolutely does not mean I am replacing their mum!
If your child goes to a childminder you can expect them to be doing all the normal things you might do if you werent working - going to the park, playing in the garden, bei g flexible to have quiet days if they're having a bad day with teething, being able to keep your child to their usual routine

Blondeshavemorefun · 23/05/2022 12:33

Wow some great support here not !!

@pinacolada22 you should be entitled to ma not smp - assume was in job for less then a week when got preg

year ago ml was 12w so many children went into childcare at 3mths and survived

can you get uc plus then in some cases they pay 85% of childcare COst if registered

sorry you are doing it alone. Hope uou have some friends or family about as dad isn’t

milk. Rule of 6. 6 hours room - 6 days fridges - 6mths frozen

yes they can have straight from fridge tho may be chilly. Can talk out hour or two before or heat up using boiling water and jug

can freeze in boob bags and take to childcare setting

take care of yourself

Thehop · 30/05/2022 21:12

thebabynanny · 22/05/2022 08:41

I would go for a childminder. No, baby won't get 1:1 attention but then my 3rd child didn't get 1:1 attention either and she seems to have survived!

A childminder will have one baby and then a couple of other preschoolers, and might do have some school age children before and after school. The experience is definitely very much like a "busy family" and actually I think that's a lovely experience for an only child. Your baby will have a close relationship with a special adult who becomes like an auntie figure, and bigger children to watch and play with. Then can come home and get 1:1 attention from you.

This!

om a childminder and the children here are so so loved and enjoy their days immensely.

i cared for a 5 week old a few years ago who started full time at 5 weeks and I pretty much wore him on a stretchy wrap! He loved being part of a busy family here and was adored by 2 families really. His mum at home and us here! He had the best of both worlds and has a lovely bond with his mummy, always has. We never replace mums. We’re a lovely extra.

sounds like you’re working incredibly hard for you and your baby, and managing to breastfeed too? You’re amazing.

Borntobeamum · 14/06/2022 19:03

I used to be a childminder and the youngest baby I had the privilege of caring for was 3 weeks old. His mummy was a teen parent and had to go sit her GCSE’s.
She was a brilliant mum and I had a lovely bond with the little boy.

Id certainly put feelers out for a childminder, and I’m sure you’ll know when you find the right one.

Good luck x x

Msmbc · 14/06/2022 19:16

OP you can get a lot more than 500 in universal credit a month, once you are privately renting and paying for childcare. When you do the calculator put in childcare costs for two days a week and put in the amount you would pay for private rental. You will then get a proper estimate.

WildOnce · 14/06/2022 19:48

I’m sorry if this has already been explained and I missed it but I’m confused as to why you did not get two weeks off following the birth of your baby. All women are entitled to 52 weeks of maternity leave regardless of any pay (SMP/MA) and all women must take two weeks off following labour and some people have to take four depending on their job. Sound a like you only had a week? I’m not being pedantic it just seems like an injustice!

For what it’s worth I think you’re facing some really hard decisions really bravely and good on you.

I would go with a childminder for a baby that young, mimics the home/family dynamic more and you know exactly who is looking after your baby.

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