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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

advice please all other childminders

31 replies

lololola · 12/01/2008 14:04

hi.
i have been c/m a little girl for almost 2 yrars. she has just been diagnosed with
diabetes type1 which requires lots of special atention. i have had her for one week
and already the worry & responsibility is killing me. i have to take her blood sugar levels twice a day, record everything and keep checking she looks "ok". i have 3 other children i c/m aswell. plus, and i know this might sound abit mean, but i have been offerd no extra money for all the extra responsibilty. i just need advice. should i carry on and see how it goes, or should i be honest and tell the parents i'm finding it too hard?

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
NoIHaventChangedMyName · 12/01/2008 14:08

I@m not a cm but my first instinct is that you will find it easier if you give it a bit more time. Also Personally if A CM asked for extra money for caring for a child who only really routinely requires a quick blood test twice a day I would leave!!

KaySamuels · 12/01/2008 14:10

I think you should talk to the parents - be honest and tell them you are feeling overwhelmed.I think you need to do as much as you can to feel comfortable looking after this little girl. The money being the same amount is just how it goes. Maybe you could go to some of her check ups with the parents, research diabetes, etc.

If you are checking her twice a day that's ok really, surely all you have to do is jot it in her daily diary? I would imagine you are montioring food and mood/energy as well as blood sugar, this can all be jotted down quickly if you just keep her diary out and open somewhere.

If she has only just been diagnosed it will seem overwhelming for everyone involved, but I think this a situation where a childminder could shine and be a real support for the family, and I think that is what you should focus on - how you can make the best of it for this little girl. Good luck.

dramaqueen · 12/01/2008 14:17

Surely you check the other children are looking OK as well, so that's not really any more than normal. If I were her parents I would question as to whether you were up to the job.

oops · 12/01/2008 14:21

Message withdrawn

lololola · 12/01/2008 14:34

thank you, i am just overwhelmed i think.
and maybe your right dramaqueen, perhaps i'm just not up for the job. better to admit that to the parenst than carry on i think.i would have more respect for a c/m that was honest. at the end of the day the childs needs are more important than what the parents may think of me. and i'm sorry, but i think i should be paid more for the extra responsibilty. if i was a parent i would offer my c/m more money.

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NoIHaventChangedMyName · 12/01/2008 14:42

DQ was a little harsh. But I still think it is unreasonable to expect more money for what is a responsibility of all CM's - making sure the child is ok!

KatyMac · 12/01/2008 14:42

Sorry lololola - but I think you are completely wrong

You cannot discriminate against this child because she has a health problem - you cannot charge her parents more than the other children it would be wrong

OFSTED & NCMA would not allow it

The only way extra money would be appropriate is if you gave the other children notice and only looked after this LO - but the parents might not be prepared to pay for sole charge - AND they may not want this

rantinghousewife · 12/01/2008 14:46

Lololola, I'm sorry did I get the wrong end of the stick. This girls parents have to manage her just diagnosed diabetes and you want to charge them extra!

lololola · 12/01/2008 14:52

thank you katymac, thats why i'm asking for advice. i know ofsted wouldn't allow it, but that doesn stop the parents offering.
but what you say about me giving notice to other children, thats what i'm thinking. the extra work with this child is not huge, but it's having the other children to look after aswell. at the end of the day i am a business just like any other, i have bills to pay and i have to be realistic. i am a good c/m, i am willing to give this my best, but im bloody scared she's going to go into whats called a "hypo" while i'm doing a school run with 3 other kids. i'm just being honest. but thank you all for being honest with your opinions.

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KatyMac · 12/01/2008 14:55

Be very careful if you give her notice because of her health you may be the one in trouble

You can pick & choose the children you care for but you can't just change your mind because of this - it would be classed as discrimination & could land you in court

lololola · 12/01/2008 14:57

rantinghousewife;

do you work? if you were asked to take on extra responsibilities, would you do them for no extra money?

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lololola · 12/01/2008 14:58

katymac;
how would i go about it then if it was just too much for me?

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KatyMac · 12/01/2008 15:00

You are a professional childminder - you take the children as they come
There will be a few months as she settles into her diagnosis/medication - she is far less likely to have problems now it's diagnosed than before when she was undiagnosed

rantinghousewife · 12/01/2008 15:02

You are paid to look after the children in your care, if one were to choke on a grape and you had to rescue the situation, would you then charge the parents extra for that?
And yes, plenty of people in the world of commerce have to take on extra work without getting paid for it.

KatyMac · 12/01/2008 15:02

Chat to the parents & explain - if you really can't cope - but most childminder I know are eager to look after children with additional needs. I know I am, I am getting a name for being the C/Mer to phone if a child needs that bit extra

C/Mers are normally better able to deal with additional needs than nurseries due to the close relationships inolved

NoIHaventChangedMyName · 12/01/2008 15:03

If ofsted won't allow it it is for good reason. It wouldn't ever cross my mind to offer extra money.

Ok practically - why was the little girl diagnosed? What led up to it? you need to ask her parents how well managed her diabetes is. The blood sugar should be a certain range, usually about 4 - 6mmols, or sometimes higher (like after a meal or snack, drink).

Regular healthy snacks and drinks should help make sure she does not go below this. Do you have to give her insulin with her lunch? If you are worried about the school run I would suggest doing one of the twice daily blood tests you need to do prior to leaving.

lololola · 12/01/2008 15:03

thank you katymac.
will update you in a few weeks.

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KatyMac · 12/01/2008 15:05

I don't know much about diabetes but most recent children with SN have been Global development delay & cystic fibrosis - but (from what I remember)well controlled diabetes is not a high risk situation (I could be wrong)

KatyMac · 12/01/2008 15:06

Not 'but' should read AS

NoIHaventChangedMyName · 12/01/2008 15:07

I'm a nurse. The patients with diabetes are a real pain. I'm thinking of asking for a little extra in my wage packet to cover the extra work.

I'm a CM - the 4 yr old in my care is still in nappies. I'm thinking of charging extra for the extra responsibility.

I'm quite sad that you have had this little girl in your care for two year and yet have expressed no sadness at the fact that this little girl has been diagnosed with this life long condition which is not only extra responsibility for you but also her parents, and when she is older, herself.

lololola · 12/01/2008 15:08

it was actually me that noticed it. she seemed to be drinking an awful lot and i know that is a sign, as my mum is type2.
i told the parents to get her checked at the doctors. i love this little girl, i'm just scared of doing something wrong.
and sorry if i'm coming across as mean. i'm not. i work for far less than the going rate in my area.

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NoIHaventChangedMyName · 12/01/2008 15:18

www.diabetes.org.uk/Guide-to-diabetes/Living_with_diabetes/Caring_for_someone_with_diabetes/For_care rsofchildrenwithdiabetes/ this may be helpful as might the website as a whole.

lololola · 12/01/2008 15:20

thank you

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NiftyNanny · 12/01/2008 15:32

lololola, i think you're just freaking out because it seems like a lot of responsibility. Let's face it though, you've already COPED with her for 2 years before this was diagnosed. She was showing symptoms - thirst, perhaps woozy? - and you coped.

You can do this, chick, you're just worried because it's a condition with a name and known risks. Don't be! Now you're better informed, better equipped and have the support of the parents, you can ask advice from them, doctors, other people on here with diabetic children.

Take a while, chill out about it and don't see it as extra responsibility. You are equally responsible for all the children's physical well being. This child has a condition that means you have to check a certain aspect of that regularly - let it serve as reassurance rather than extra stress.

As an anecdote - a friend of mine had diabetes all her life and sometimes slipped into a hypo at school. It's quite simple to deal with, she'd get herself some lucozade or a mars bar and within a little while would feel much better. Now you know the signs, you can check and pretty soon it'll be routine. You can make sure she's less likely to have swings in her blood sugar by planning meals with that in mind. Don't worry. You can do this. You know you can, but I think you're just a bit shocked by it all and worrying that you're going to do something wrong. Ask for support, but I wouldn't be tempted to throw your hands up and give this child notice, it's really not fair on her or her parents, it's discrimination and at the end of the day, once you are more used to the routines involved with her care I'm sure you'll settle into a more relaxed state anyway and will wonder why you panicked at first.

Good luck!

looneytune · 12/01/2008 15:37

TOTALLY agree with NiftyNanny - well said I think you're just scared, we all worry about the responsibility of other peoples children, it's only natural as we are caring human beings I think you're just more worried than usual and need a little time to get over the shock of what this means but you'll be fine! Sometimes things don't come across very well online, I've had it before where people read into a post totally the wrong way but they didn't know me and didn't see the whole picture. I also agree with whoever said that this is your chance to shine. The parents are probably very worried too as this is so new but if you are supportive and strong for them, they'll think even more so that you're the best childminder in the world

Keep us posted with how it all goes and agree, a little research may help to reassure you as having the knowledge usually helps.

LT x