Nanny advice please

[Lovepluto]

I am returning to work after being a SAHM and have two girls (age 5 and 8). I'd love advice from those with experience of nannies and housekeepers. Would it be better to go with option 1 or option 2 below (or something else I haven't thought of!):

Option 1: have a daytime housekeeper (for morning drop off/cooking/laundry/ironing/cleaning etc. 7.45am - midday) and after-school nanny (starting with pickup at 3, helping with homework, serving dinner, putting to bed, finishing at 8pm). Would use holidays camps during school holidays (which we already use quite a bit anyway)

Option 2: have a nanny housekeeper do everything as above, starting 7.45am and finishing 8pm (seems like very long hours!)

What are the pros and cons of each option and which one do you think would work better?

Thank you for your help!

Why do you need an 8pm finish?
Will you ever see your children?
Maybe boarding school would be an option?

7.45am-8pm is too long a day for one person to do, but it will be easier to recruit 1 full time person than try to find an after school nanny imo.

I assume money isn't an issue?

I would try to sort something else out in the morning like breakfast club, and then hire a nanny/housekeeper who will do say 10am-8pm.

Or, a live in au pair who could do 7.45-9am the end of the day to support a nanny housekeeper working 9-5.

From Having a SAHM to a nanny 8-8 seems quite a huge jump for your girls!

Thank you for thoughtful (and thought provoking!) messages. Lesser hours are not easily available in my line of work, at least not from the outset, but I'd hope to request these if and when I'm more established in the new role and see what happens. Yes I feel for my girls and it's very hard to leave them, but I feel it's time...

You say "we". Are both of you working those hours?
Breakfast club at school.
Housekeeper not needed every day, so 2 or 3 days a week doesnt matter too much if there is an issue one day.
Afterschool nanny or au pair for the evenings.

Any way you could leave work earlier, and work the last few hours from home, or will you a totally need to be present?
Any way you can rake a drop in responsibility (and salary) and get hone to see the kids?
I was a SAHM when my youngest was 4-9. He doesnt remember childcare, and has really struggled - and we are talking a couple of hours a week.

Yes I feel for my girls and it's very hard to leave them, but I feel it's time.. time for what exactly?

Having two employees means that you have to manage two people ... their problems, holidays, sickness. However, it means you can get two people who are each "specialists" and, if you're lucky, might be able to cover each other to an extent. With one person doing the whole thing, you're looking at a 60 hour week and are very exposed if they're off for any reason
Perhaps re-consider what you're looking for a bit. What are your DC going to be doing for those five hours after school? Can the nanny do some of the day to day stuff then and then you just have a cleaner ... and sort out something for before school?
My DC are older but we have an after school nanny who starts at 3pm as that builds in 30 mins or so for her to go to the supermarket/post office/uniform shop before school pick up (3.40). I don't care if she does those errands between 3.00 & 3.40 or if she does them at some other point during the day (as she usually does). Nor do I care if she gets some of her own shopping whilst doing errands for me.
She gets home with the DC at about 4pm and then they have 30 mins screen time whilst she sorts out packed lunches, sports kits (including putting a load of washing on if necessary) and the dishwasher if it needs doing. Depending on what clubs are going on, there's then a mixture of taxi service, playing with the kids, supervising homework etc as well as cooking tea. Once a week, DC1 is at a club and DC2 has a tutor at home so the nanny does their ironing and will change beds or something if I ask but at other times reads or whatever. I'd never ask her to clean the loo or anything but she's willing to do most things occasionally and will also do things because she's just sensible and kind - like sort out the fridge after milk spilled everywhere. From 6.30, it's screen time again so the nanny might finish tidying up the kitchen & run the hoover around if she hasn't already done it or watch TV with them or something.
We also have a cleaner who comes twice a week. One long sessions when she does a full clean including changing the beds, swapping the towels over, wiping out the fridge etc; one shorter session when she just does the kitchen, the children's bathroom (toothpaste everywhere!) and a couple of key rooms downstairs. Again, she's flexible so, if we've got friends coming to stay or something, they do the guest room instead.
The holidays are much the same. My two DC are both sporty so happily go off to clubs and the nanny collects as usual.

Can you not do breakfast club, then a cleaner/housekeeper a couple of times a week, and an after school nanny?
Surely you don't need a housekeeper every day?

Hopefully you will manage to get 2 people who your girls will get on with.

Get one person to do 7:45-9:45 and 3-8pm. That's 7hrs per day.

Many nannies work a 12hr day including myself

Tho 8pm is a late finish every day

I would Prob look for an 8-8 but make clear when kids are at school qbs household stuff done that they have own time to chill /watch tv /read book at youre or own joke if they want if local

We have a nanny that does split shifts - 7.30-9 and 2-6 so it’s definitely doable. Ignore those who have no understanding of the myriad of reasons you want to return to work or seem to think that people can just pick and choose the hours they work

7.45-8 is too long and you may struggle to find someone who will work that late without being live in. I think the suggestion of breakfast club + an afternoon housekeeper/nanny is probably the best.

Go to an agency. You only pay if they find someone but their advice is invaluable. They’ll tell you what kind of post will be possible to fill or what you might need to offer to make the job more attractive.

8pm is a late finish and pretty late for your children too. Why so late?

8-7 would be more typical for a nanny

Do you really need a daily housekeeper. If no one’s at home then houses don’t get too messy.

I’m a nanny
12 hour days are completely normal.
8 pm finish is late so this might be difficult.
7 to 7 pm would be better.
Splits shifts are difficult to fill . Because nanny can’t get other work in the gap.
Cost of travelling to you twice . You would need someone who lived close by. So depends on your location .

My youngest is 6 and I can't imagine ever feeling it was "time" to leave him such long hours to go back to work.....
Surely having a child/children means you would like to be able to see them more than just weekends?
And before everyone jumps on me saying "hours can't be chosen and things aren't that easy for my line of work" surely this was factored in when you chose to have those children? And also yourr eldest has had 3 extra years of you being at home in comparison to the youngest.
5 is still so very young and I know personally my son would be so upset and not getting to see me at all in the week.

Could you work from home at all so you can see the children a bit more? Have that cover there in case you need to take a call etc but just being in the house would make a huge difference.
Try to get the same person to do it all if you need to cover those hours as otherwise your children will have 2 different people looking after them each day.

I know people do it but I think going from seeing a parent 24 7 to only really seeing them 2 days a week is a massive upheaval for a child. Children struggle with it enough in separations do you both (as you say we) work 12 hour days?

I know a family who have a housekeeper who does mornings, school drop off, cleaning and cooking and a nanny who does school pick up, activities, homework supervision, bed time. She also organises their activities, camps etc and works full time during school holidays, inset days, sick days when the kids are unwell and the occasional Saturday morning. The nanny gets paid very well and is paid full time hours which is assumed to average out over the year. I am good friends with the nanny. The family have had various combinations over the years and this seems to work for now. Between them, the nanny and the housekeeper do most of the children related admin and organising.

Could you do a school breakfast club for the pre school time and then have an after school nanny for the collections? Won't the kids be in bed by the time you get home from work every day?

Do you have room for a live in nanny? The they could have time off in the day and work full time in the holidays (or choose to send to groups/camp etc). You would pay them a gross annual salary, children's sickness would be covered - which wouldn't be if split shift. And get a cleaner / weekly housekeeper to tidy and clean. You rarely find a candidate who is happy to look after the children, clean and work into the evenings